We're gonna go through what we've gone before in a way that, like, how can you do this instinctively? Some of this is not. You're gonna need to practice some of this. Remember, we talked about how to do the period, this climax of your speech, that will take practice and a lot of rewriting and a lot of memorization, okay. We're talking here about the stuff that you're gonna walk away with now and you're gonna need to go back and take a look at some of these materials. What do we call them?
The bonus materials.
The bonus materials, duh. Alright, some of these things you're gonna find in the bonus materials and you're gonna be able to practice. You're gonna have some exercises. You'll go to ArgueLab.com. But one of these is make them feel comfortable, that's the first thing you do. Get them into cognitive ease. You're not gonna make them think they're less powerful than you. They're gonna be physically comfortable if you can arrange it and that's part of the occasion. You can't contro...
l it all, if you can, wait for when they are comfortable. Pivot to the future, this is when, people tell me this is the number one thing they walk away with when they hear any talk about this art of persuasion. It's something you don't generally think about that now you will and this should be an instinct. I'm in trouble, things are uncomfortable, people are disagreeing with me, there's anger in the room. How do I pivot? What tense should I be in? It's gonna be the future. It's really, that's actually kinda easy, right? You just gotta get used to doing it. It's gonna take some practice. That's a no brainer. Yes, and. We just talked about that. Don't say but. And basically what that means is don't push back. If somebody disagrees with you, don't immediately then, I've gotta score some points, here. I gotta beat the other person. You simply nod your head, acknowledge the person, send those love beams out of your eyes. Show yourself to be the better person in the room if there are people looking on. So be the adult, don't lose it no matter how much of a jerk the other person is. Acknowledge what they're saying, nod your head without actually agreeing with them and then say, yeah, and... And steer the conversation around. That takes a little more practice, not entirely a no brainer but it's no brain enough to be on this list. Be the audience, that's the audience has the power. The audience is the decider. So be the Pope. How do you do that? By listening and then ask for definitions. What do you mean by? It's a great way to frame an issue, by the way. Say is this really about? How do you define the issue? Ask for facts, ask for specific facts, numbers. Ask for the sources of those facts, where did they get that? And do that in such a way that you're not going, hey, what are your facts? Do you have any? Instead, you say, this is really interesting. Can you give me a number? Where'd you get that, I'd like to go to that website. Be positive and you know what, some people will see it as being ironic. So much the better. But people, even if they think you're being a little ironic, will be flattered that you look interested, at least. C3. Caring, craft, cause. This is gonna apply to your resume and your website. Do an audit of your character as you project it to the world. Everybody does that now. How are you in social media? Are you looking like you know what you're doing and can apply it to specific situations? Do you have some case studies that you can go, we talked about this in regard to profiteroles. This can apply to everything else. Are you showing you know what to do and that you've solved specific problems for specific occasions. Can you teach this to other people? That's gonna show how much you care and do you represent some higher value. What's this really about? This is not about profiteroles, this is giving people precious moments during their day and there are not enough precious moments in this world. Never thought I'd be saying that of profiteroles. (audience laughing) Ramp the action and this is not even talking about lures right now, we talked about that enough and lures take practice, they're hard, you need to collect the data points and know how to meet a desire. Ramping the action actually is really easier. It's like saying, I'm not gonna ask for the final step. I want an action, I wanna sell something, I want people to do things but first, I'm gonna give them something really easy and fun. Then I'm gonna give them a second step that's just a little bit beyond that. Don't go to this website, do this thing on this website that you really wanna do. Have fun. In reframing you ask what is this about? Basically that means not accepting the frame. Until you want to. Is this about peanut butter or is it about your relationship with your lame boyfriend? Remember that? Finally we get to the no brainer at the end of them, which does not sound like a no brainer but it really has to do with, does the proof make sense? Can I trust the proof? Is the source of that proof trustworthy? Does it lead to a reasonable choice and is there the right number of choices? Is the proof good? Is the choice good? Is it the right number of choices? Does the one lead to the other? And these are things, now, obviously these aren't necessarily no brainers but these are the basic tools that seem to apply to most situations and this is what sums up this wonderful art of rhetoric. What's most important of all? Is that this is not no brainers, this is a changed brainer. So I hope what you're gonna do is you're gonna be thinking, this is not about me. This is about my audience's beliefs, their expectations, what moods they're in, and what they think of me. How can I get this all to work properly? And all that leads to is a highly social world where you get along with people in some new ways. I think this is the way we change not just our brains but we change the world. Here is my cause. It is a real cause. I hope that you will now become not just practitioners of this wonderful art of persuasion but champions of it. Get to the top of this consumer journey of rhetoric and spread the word. We are in trouble as a society. I'm not gonna get political but you know this. We're in trouble as a society. We don't know how to get along. We make assumptions about each other and we assume that whole groups of people are doing evil upon the world. That itself is an evil. This is an art that lets people get along with each other and learn to like and respect one another. It is a dark art that does terrible things but it also brings people together and built the civilization we have. So I can't emphasize this enough. Learn more about this. This isn't about what I want. The books I wanna sell. That's not why I did this. I did this because I discovered that this is an art that brought this country together and helped create the world as we know it in the best way, today. In order to sustain that, you need to know this art and you need to get other people to understand it, as well. It's the art of leadership that brings people together. So that's the sermon part of this. How do you get in touch with me? I would love for you to stay in touch. In the usual ways and go to ArgueLab.com for the exercises and you have the bonus material to help you practice.
One of the world’s leading persuasion consultant, Jay has trained top speechwriters, lawyers, and entrepreneurs to influence people and take the anger out of arguments. And he teaches high school and college students the persuasion skills of leadership—while showing how to avoid getting manipulated.
I read Jay's book, Thank You For Arguing, a couple years ago, and it was life-changing! The course is terrific too and absolutely worth taking to learn how to communicate more effectively with other people, particularly anyone who may not understand or agree with your perspective or whose support you may need for something but don't know how to ask for or get it. Like in his book, the advice, ideas, and strategies Jay shares in this course will help you become a more confident communicator and also have more successful and happier interactions and relationships as a result. Highly recommend!
Excellent course for those who want to learn how to argue efficiently and respectfully. I've read Jay Heinrich's two books and was thrilled to see he had a course on here. It helped me consolidate the extensive knowledge I gained from his "Thank you for Arguing" (great book!). Unlike some, I loved his quirky presentation style! But then, as a huge fan, I'm biased!
I really enjoyed this class. It was chock full of information that I will be chewing on for awhile. I love hearing the examples after learning the process. It helped with the understanding of what we had just gone over. I would recommend this class for everyone, whether it be for your job or your life in general. We all need these skills in our arsenal. Jay Heinrichs does a terrific job in his instruction of these rhetoric concepts.