Discovering Your Show & Format
We are now we're going to move into another section that still kind of talks about the concept of story concept of audience and we're going to actually attempt to brainstorm some stuff at the end of this, okay? So at the end we're going to go through and try to get some some ideas of your story and your story as well. So so let's go through again what is your business? What is your passion? What is your story? What is your why? Remember at the break? I said could you tell me a bit of your story isn't what I asked at the break? Did any of you kind of put together your personal story? Did you write them? Jean? Yeah, you wanted I would love it? Absolutely. And then online online of you wonderful online people tell me your story go ahead and put it in the chat box and we'll get to it but jane, go for it. So to give you just a bit of calm ticks I shared with you earlier that I lost three million dollars in one day and so now you're kind understand this, but my name is jean I do what I do be...
cause I want to make a difference coaching others to a higher level is my purpose I'm creating a community of others that are in the trenches of their business my podcast leaders in the trenches gives me the chance to create free content and add value with those interviews brilliant brilliant and do you talk about your personal story and that in there yeah that the framework was small so no, I didn't that's fine absolutely you do this because of these things that have happened to yeah right um wonderful anybody else sir? I think you know it's great in this environment just hearing different stories and kind of gets me to remember about things I didn't necessarily remember for a long time it zero calling when he was talking about uh, how being responsible for your business or your your life and it got me thinking of when I was working my corporate job, huh over six years ago and being there every day and seeing my co worker just so upset and didn't like their jobs and this is not but they never did anything to fix it, you know? And being around those people just drove me not I couldn't see him being around people who don't, you know, take responsibility and try and make something better and through, you know, through that it really drove me when I got home at night to start looking online and doing very saying so that, you know, almost accepted years ago I walked in there and I quit just because I've been ableto make more from home and I was a corporate job but it was it was from the people I was working with beverly help to me is this going because I couldn't stand it but just taking that responsibility that you couldn't you khun do whatever you want if it is a passion enough about it and, you know, never give up on so this was a window into what you didn't want to become, right you came from a place where that was where you saw what it did, it also affected you and how you wanted to live your life differently because you you were doing that before, right? And we knew what that what? That the cost of that, right? I mean, I wasn't happy there either, but I was definitely proactively going home at night and not just have complaining about I was going ok that's that is what it is yet what can I do tonight to make tomorrow a little bit better on cool? So so think about that and think about what your story is my name and why I do what I do now and that's I mean obviously it's because because of that you've been there and now you have seen that this you want to go in a direction where you you have the reins essentially yeah, I mean that that is a part of my passion to say you know I get it you know? So many people don't like what they're doing and yeah, we are looking for a better way to you know, do you do what they wanted to make money from their passion so I want to you know, I want to help people follow those dreams and cool you know what technologies out there to help you actually those excellent so let me to jump over that have to do that I thought I shared by an earlier so you did well right right, right, right that the just taken responsibility yeah, that is that's your story right that ultimately I think it it follows over into I can't think of an aspect of life actually that it doesn't follow over into, you know and one of the things earlier I tried to go into business and getting people to prepare for disasters yeah, but unfortunately, you know that's not a very sexy kind of where nobody wants to prepare for disaster. I mean, just like insurance salesman, right? But um people do want more and more take control of their outcomes and so that's kind of forms the basis of what I try and do every day that's awesome I mean, you can come up with so many different ideas I mean, obviously you have a business based around it but it's just such a such a strong brand tio that you know to kind of take responsibility and no where yes, what your story kind of where it comes from and why you're kind of here to talk to talk about those those those things that's there was attracts the type of customers that I really love to work with you I think I love I love to hear from them on the phone or you know, email or something so the more we know about our stories the better it's going toe equipped us to find the audience members that really connect with us personally. So it's dennis dennis did you come up with a story for yourself? Well yes when I was sharing my passion that's really the story so the story was yes how you have you the audience was the one that helps you tapped into your story right? And you know to anthony's point my mission statement remember saying at the time was that want to help you take control of your personal are you professional destiny no matter what's happening with the economy or your current job and what I end up doing is providing the tools and the skills and the knowledge and that gives me the satisfaction and instead of working with people that I enjoy working with that I get I get fulfilled because of what it how it helps them yeah well, now we're now yes, and I think that there's a through line here and the only person I don't think we had talked we had last time. Well, where was you right way didn't hear from you in the last time you do, we should say no, I don't think so. What's your story? Well, my story is that I was hiding in the business world, growing up in switzerland, working for the swiss government, working for the swiss banking industry, coming to silicon valley, it's, whole business business business, and in two thousand six, I lost six million dollars because of a bad business decision and very quickly within about six months, and it got me to a place of despair became homeless and, you know, just just really lost everything, including my health, and what people didn't know is that I've had three near death experiences at the ages of five and fifteen and twenty five that I didn't have anybody to talk to when I was growing up. So it was a part of me that even my ex husband didn't want to embrace it just was a part of him that just didn't know what to do with it because you don't just have a near death experience and get away with it, and I came to a place of having nothing being nothing, having your accomplishments just being really down and out and going back to the drawing board and realizing that I need to just be authentic, I can't hide in the business world on my life and let this other major part of who I am go and so I decided to leave the u s and to hide in the italian alps and swiss alps and get my phds and metaphysical science and embraced that part but then merge it, emerge it back with the business aspect of it so now I'm helping the mind body spirit feel those people how to stay authentic but how to really bring the business forward that they are is taking its grounding, its grounding that spirituality, isn't it it's taking that and putting it almost gets these practical there's way too many spiritually people that are airy fairy and they're not grounded they're not practical and I don't have the left brain and so for me it's about bridging the two but while being authentic that's a big moment that is so you have a very distinct audience because of them because there are people that want to bridge those two sides right exactly what they have to they have to they have to bridge the two sides in order to go anywhere you have no bridge to side so that's a pretty powerful story and I want to hear about this at some point the near death experiences er and all everybody's story obviously relates to their audience is well, how about online? Do we have anybody who wait a few? We do passionfruit passionfruit one of my favorite fruits of an idea person with a lot of business experience I've always been super uptight and meticulous about my own regimen did a lot of research and experimentation with it as a result my friends will come to me for help with their own resumes and eventually I realized I could turn this into more of a system and help everybody because you know she says I everybody had a lot of people I made don't understand the power and potential than missing opportunity so she's now creating a region by writing online course to help people learn what she has already left so people were asking her to do this and this is what happens I mean if someone knows that you're good at something or you find that you're good at something and people are like hey, can you can you do this for me? Can you do this for me and eventually that's the key tell right there that that's the the thing that you're supposed to strive and do if that's something you're passionate about so that's that's awesome that's a great story any anyone else indeed we got one val mac she says my name is valerie I'm a business coach because I love helping people tackled their issues and upping their leadership skills I always wanted to be a teacher as a child I originally became a programmer because they make more money but I'm born to be a teacher and you're doing my mba I took a one hr course and now that's what I do so I'm back coaching and teaching so she loves coaching and teaching and where did that come from? Where did she say that came from? She said it just came to as a child she wanted to be a time teachers a child but she went into programming to make money and developer leadership skills again a very smart thing to do but then she had the financial background I'm guessing to really pursue her passion so you were able you were able to do both it sounds like you were you used the programming to bridge that gap and still have that passion of teaching and relais that into your into your teaching so congrats that's that's brilliant I want you to lose something you do constant little different I'm a painted because I love to invent magical worlds and invite people into them teo teo well, who doesn't love to live in their own creativity live in their own imagination? I mean that's to me that's amazing to be able to take what's in your head and apply it and put it into a visual medium is is just just it's it's ridiculously cool I've never been able to do it I've never been really a painter or or anyone who could draw my wife is very good but to be able to take that that's that makes complete sense anyone else I could never draw either that was always my handicap it sue says my name issues I do what I do because I just love people and share my knowledge and expertise to help women look feel and be beautiful which builds their self esteem and it builds their self comp so so I'm guessing she's got some kind of advisor could be online or something like that is there something that what's her name again? Suze based on that based on that you want people to look and feel good? Is there anything that has affected you or anything affected any loved one or someone in your life where they weren't made to feel good or they weren't or maybe they were set apart or is there a specific type of beauty that you're interested in natural beauty? You know, high cosmetic beauty, anything specific that that kind of that is tapping into what you personally like to do for instance here's a for instance my wife okay she's not watching she's working she has a studio pallotti's a studio in l a in fact the makeup artist one of her best friends takes it goes to the studio so my wife's studio a lot of times when you think fitness you think like look better naked all right? So her studio that's not that's not what they do that it's it's about your best body you could possibly have and everybody no matter who you are can come into the studio and feel comfortable so a lot of people in fitness if you haven't worked out in years and you come to a studio and and you just see just tight rip people just you know, pumping and doing their thing you walk away, you get out of the probably leave the jam because you're intimidated but her factor is she doesn't want she wants to not keep this stigma of like the body alive, right? She doesn't want to say you have to have the have this l a body which no one can have I mean it's just this indignant it's not riel instead of having the l a body I have the best body you could possibly have and that's my wife has always said that that's that's her style of teaching and training health and fitness it's not about fitness to become like you know to try toe be somebody else's body you know if that's not what your body is going to do it's to be the best body you can have and it's a very distinct difference if you notice that yeah so it's so when we're talking about something like something like makeup or artistry or trying to help people look at her feel good, where does that come from? Just so just think about that where does that come from for you from you personally and for me my wife it was she went through a process of of finding her best body right but not what hollywood perceives as your best body her best body because hollywood perceives it as a photoshopped twig standing there no comment on that I don't want to rustle any of any feathers here so great we talked about that now what what I want to talk about right now is is a question that a lot of us maybe have if we do because I want to bring it back to this online events and doing doing online video ok, so with that said here's a question for you online audience here's a question for you do you have a fear of putting yourself in front of a camera like I would think I would hear someone from the audience online audience say yes, I do casey you're now lie down casey what do you didn't saying? You know it's weird because I don't feel that I have a fear, but when I get on the camera and I shoot my videos and you can find it on youtube, I just looks tough and I feel a little bit stiff but then everyone says, well, you know, you get over exaggerate for the camera and I'm like when I just feels weird who says that people told you have to over exaggerate for that there's a lot of people have said that casey but you know, I'm being honest with me and laying it out there you know, there's fear that's inside me that's not necessarily something I think about it happens just happens what even help your voice should have had that what if you hate your voice all the way you look on video we have a solution for that I'll be I'll be talking about that molly is it molly molly yeah, we'll be we'll be talking about how you can get over those little issues that you might be experiencing um is it in this one? I think it might be in this one young so ok, here is here's stigma one the show hollywood stigma this is you when you're creating a show, you might think, well, I what if I get a million people coming to my video or what if I, you know, get so many people seeing me that's a lot of pressure I don't know if I can handle I don't know if I'm gonna be able to get into my life event and then just freeze it and not speak l because so nervous and so you leave and I've had that happen to you actual clients and customers we I've moderated alive meant for someone before and she got up in there she had a lot of people listening watching she got up there and she just froze like she couldn't figure she couldn't think of what to say people are asking questions and and I was sleeping I was there to moderate so I was I was like, ok, well so we have this question from this person so can you elaborate and she just she she froze on part of it and I have to say part of it was that it was not being prepared and it was not being confident and it was her first time and that she didn't practice because practicing practicing practicing is exactly what's going to get you over those issues so this could be potentially excuse me a fear of failure and a fear of success. What happens if you do have a million people to come to your video and then what happens if you fail to those million people? What if you don't convert those people? What if they see who you really are in your missus conception of who you really are like you think you're some sort of phony well that's not give me the case and a lot of us think that what if they don't believe me what if I get excuse me a million people watching? How do I react to that? How do I keep them engaged? You know, I'm not seinfeld, I'm not I'm not, you know, the really ian, the tall buff guy from vampire diaries, and so how am I going to get them to consider listening to me and watching watching me so what's the secret behind all this so here's something that I do one little thing that I do very small little little tweak little thing that I do, and it is finding rely on the intimacy of your surroundings. This is when you, when you're creating a video find and rely on the intimacy of your surroundings, just you your camera, which you really shouldn't be afraid of a camera mean is literally just a piece of plastic and metal and glass, and, you know, nothing really should terrify you of that of that camera itself because you're not streaming out to the world. Yet when you're doing a video now, yes, we are streaming out too a lot of people at the moment, but that's it's a different it's a different situation, but because we're in this intimate surrounding it doesn't have to overwhelm you, it doesn't have to bombarding it doesn't have to make you sweat and think about all those people that are watching I mean, my voice just went high because I started thinking about don't let your voice do that don't let yourself get trapped in that mindset. So what I often times do is I if I'm going to stream and I'm the only one doing it too, a live audience, that's listening, you know, on the other end of my camera and a webinar let's, say or doing a video, I focus on just one person I'm speaking to one person so here's something interesting, but who do you speak to? Let me ask you, who would you speak to? Who is the one person that that you'd speaks to you? I'm curious about this because I have an answer that I believe, but I want to know what you believe my my story always are answers to a client situation, so I always visualize client whoever this person is about or if it's a personal story actually talk to the person that I want to talk to if it's about pain or whatever, how about the online audience? Do we have anybody but they want to do you talk to? So this is a challenge for me? Personally, I have used the technique of imagining I'm talking to a friend or a loved one who really needs what it is that I'm offering them but is resistant to the concept and so I have to really be gentle and get that point across them that's interesting and wow that's a very, very interesting way to do it so based on that I mean a role into this slide here, so excuse me, experts people have actually said this that it's nice to visualize say a spouse or loved one right? And this is maybe someone something you do, but this is going to fly in the face of that I really don't believe that I say no to that concept and the reason I say no to it and here's the reason is that yes, your spouse and your loved one is going to you're saying what you just said is that they're opposed to it a little and you have to almost convince them somewhat it's interesting the reason I say no to that concept is is because a loved one or someone that is in your life yes, they're always going to sort of have an opposition to maybe potentially, um what you are as an expert to a degree here's why? Because uh they have a pre expectation of what they know of you think I just said that writes they've known you since however it like a sister or brother they've known you your entire life they have a concept of who you are so if you have a new concept of who you are or if you consider yourself something in an expert in a certain field than positioning them as the person that you're going to communicate with in my opinion sets you up to have teo teo almost have to like you know when you're like having to explain something to your brother or sister that you do this and it's almost like you have to desperately having to say no I actually do this like so and you try to explain it and you over explain it you nod your head and you get frantic about it because they're not listening that's not who you want a position because your audiences are people that are listening they're not people that are listening there people that are listening you don't have to shout remember that you don't have to shout just have to sit back have a conversation and tell them exactly why you do what you do and be matter of fact be distinct and no what you're saying that's all just know that you are the expert so I say no to that concept what I do is I create a figment of my ideal customer someone who unconditionally respects you someone who you have proven your expertise to so that's why I like what you said someone eager to learn from you without bias preconception or judgment ok that's what I would say so me, I would look at probably an existing customer that knows that I'm weird, I'm corky that I'm who I am that I'm me, I'm not having to be anything that's, not me that's the person that I want to communicate with someone who was already on my level, someone who I don't have to explain myself to someone that I can freely talk to and not feel like I have to convince them of anything because your your true audience, you don't have to convince them, you just have to give them the solutions you have to convince them of the solutions just give him the solutions, dennis, I want to hear yours as well, bobby's saying, I prefer to speak to someone I don't know as opposed to my husband exactly what you're saying that mt gal is saying she imagines a friend or he imagines a friend and found that now this is interesting to get your opinion here can't see, because I'm a perfectionist, I am focused on what I am saying and getting it right, and I'm not necessarily focusing on who I should be talking to. I don't think that would work for me. What do you think? So, you know, I have a little of that when I'm in my I mean, I'm all enthusiastically in my rhythm, and I just I'm just assuming that and you don't even something some of us don't need to see somebody you don't have, some of us don't need to visualize who that who that person is because we can feel it from the camera. You're feeling it, you can feel it from from you, like your I'm talking to you right now, like, so if you could do that, if you if it's not if you don't have to create and write down, say, this figment of a person than then, you know, you're just you're just doing it essentially it's the same concept to a degree because this camera, this perfection it what was her name vow so well, you know, vallis fails thinking about the words she's thinking about her words as she is relating it to to the cameras. Essentially, the camera becomes her ideal candidate, that one person that she's communicating too, right? But dennis, when how do you talk to who do you? Well, it's interesting. The first time I was going to speak to a live audience that was extremely nervous, and I took someone who had helped and coached individually. I said, will you come with me and just sit in the audience and having peter there? Made me comfortable like I was talking to somebody who you said unconditionally respects and likes me and that gave me the confidence to then talk to the people I didn't know and when I got scared I would look at him and he would smile and so doing the same thing mentally works I can see absolutely it's you know some of us might do better with strange there's some of us might do better with family members it really just I guess it depends on what your personal preferences me personally I do better in a in a room with strangers and I do if I like if my mom was watching are you my my wife was watching I would feel that's where the pressure applies is is where is when I start feeling pressure um but in a crowded room of a lot of people and having maybe a familiar face I can see how that could work because then you kind of relate that familiar face with the rest of the crowd and then everybody becomes kind of brought in at that point so well I remembered every time I look that I was in fact credible because peter would not at me like yes you do know what you're talking about talking and they believe it yeah yeah exactly when you first realize that you figure that out especially if you're you know for one of your first talks always like well, I should just keep going then I think I'm doing it right we all have those fears and those anxieties that that were fake somewhere ponies and we're you know, things like that so it's it's just natural so let me move in to the next stigma as we pointed out, I can't stand the sound of my own voice and I I just really don't like how I look in front of camera camera and sound ten pounds to me you know it's it's uh it's just not what I'm used to and there are a couple of reasons um one reason is we're really used to seeing ourselves in front of a mirror you know, if you're never if you've never really put yourself in front of camera, I know obviously we take photographs of each of ourselves all the time and selfies of course you take a ton of selfies and so we pretty much do know what we look like now um in instead of the reverse which into a mirror we look we see the opposite of what we look like, right? So it's kind of like the mirror image of ourselves, so we're so when we're putting yourselves in front of cameras sometimes we like do I look like that? I didn't think I look like that right? So where we get really worried and folk about that um also when we hear ourselves you know what we hear is our voice inside our own head so when we listen to the camera and hearing our voice back and consign shrill, it can sound whatever you know worries that we might have about what our voice sounds like in her head it's exaggerated now on camera and we start panicking about that so ah, few things to resolve this um really only one thing repetition okay, the more you do it, the better it's going to get the more you're going to get used to those sounds of your own voice on camera and you're going to get used to seeing yourself so creative video and watch it watch it once, twice, three times, four times five times get used to it. Oh, get used to who you are on camera and I'll just feel more effective when you're when you are putting yourself in front of a camera so definitely practice that, um okay, excuse me stigma stigma number three before we go into that, are there any questions about voice and putting myself putting myself from the camera? Anybody? Not that we're still on was still on her you talking tio s three I'm not good enough, so I'm going to copy and paste somebody else's style, right? How many of you have ever done that where you see somebody really like right there, their energy on stage their energy on video is something just really great and you are always like I'm just I want to do that I want to be that guy so there you know there are people that do that and there's there's really nothing wrong with with seeing what other people are doing and then finding inspiration okay? Because please understand that I'm not saying it's wrong to find inspiration and others I think it's it's good that you're doing that but here's the thing you're not going to do a perfect impression of of anybody except yourself or yeah essentially that's it right? So I think it's best to find inspiration in those people that you may resonate with and connect with but realize that you're never going to be that person you gotto took sort of tap into your own to your own self and any any questions on that do do you have anybody that you online audience do you have anybody that you think is really cool in your niche and field that you resonate with you sometimes you know whether it's somebody who idolize something that you want to be more like is there someone like that and then for the inside office audience here do you guys ever feel like that? Um I mean, I think I've definitely used more of a blue print approach like yeah guy's done something that I really resonated with a really liked but you know you definitely had to put your own spin on very smart yes so take the blueprint put your own spin on it that's very smart way to do it you did ask for it on I didn't pay for this endorsement thank you greg d greg d says I get inspired by j k is presenting style three isis media he has that smooth british style greg because I'm really from tennessee thank breaking both of you really appreciate it thank you, casey for inviting that who doesn't want to sound like that? I mean I don't want to sound like you could sound like this what? You know you have a perfect marriage between the two of you would be like the perfect today thank you for this this hybrid accent there would be a very fascinating patient I actually used to hate my boy so much so because my parents used to tell me that my voice wasn't good enough for singing so I grew up thinking that my boys sterile so when I got into teaching tell a seminar that would actually higher voice overs can you believe that it just became too expensive? You know, I just said this is ridiculous plus they had a huge accent when I came to this country for so I was really insecure on top of that that's so it's so interest that's wait, I want, you know, perfection when you're a perfectionist, it doesn't matter if you're in front of the camera, like now my eye is broken, for example, it's a condition and and I could find flaws left and right, like you say, you know, if you're trying to fit into, like, a hollywood type of thing, you're never going to be happy. And finally, I just threw up my hands and said, screw it all, I'm just going to do this. I'm going to go in front of the camera, even the video for here, you know, I just I was in my pony tail and just throw on a sweater. I just don't you got to get to a place where all of that it's just ego? Yeah, and it's not important anymore, it becomes about the message. I love that you said that because and the thing that you just pointed out, if you need to embrace those imperfections where a lot of us we push them away because that's what we're conditioned we have especially in, like, when we're kids and family and things like that and it's just it's utter is under misconceptions.