How to Recruit a Partner
So communicate the specific opportunity up front. Now, I'm getting to the part about what we're going to do the exercises, so I just want to give some hints here about it, um, be specific upfront, have a method or two in mind, so you're thinking you're going to be talking to your partner's appear it's one of you, um, usually you meet us approach. I wrote a whole book on that, which unfortunately did not have the title I wanted just called getting what you want address their interests first, how relates to what I had in mind, and then how it could be helpful to us, not your it's gonna be hard to try to do that up here while you're also thinking about your person that you're going to be approaching to recruit, and you're going to describe to us what kind of partner potential partner that isthe but just remember it's always better to start with them. So the last part on that user you be used the air method. If you look up harvard business review and air in my name, you'll see up column on...
that, but the three elements that make people remember what you say, is it actionable? Are you asking for something specific on which they can ask, does it have interesting this? Is there something that gets my attention even though I didn't want to pay attention to it? And is it relevant to me in my situation right now? So that's a very condensed wait approach this these air really, really hard and then something clicks in your mind and like a dry alcoholic when other people are doing that, you resent them for not doing it because you get that makeover and just know that from research that's been done at wharton and harvard, less than three percent of people and any statistically significant way address someone else's interests first, so imagine how you stand out when you do that. I had to re read that and then I read the study and the study was that it's pretty well designed, so this is a setup for exercises I want you to turn to your partner and they've got a three person thing in one place, right? And the one of you that has an idea for a kind of partner in mind, whoever raise your hand quickest between the two of you, they're going to say I want you to be this kind of partner and described him way we just talk about some specific tools to really implement using these approaches, huh? So just exactly how we would go about doing I should role model once that might help yeah, yeah, yes um because you serve so many high end people and what they want in their home and that's where you've got a very defined expertise and probably in a narrow market but one that's just right for you I happen to serve those same people in the same way but the opposite of being any sense at all about their aesthetic but they really like tio show off in their home and it's really important to them so I haven't installed this is totally not true I haven't installed all the home theaters and all the electrical stuff for other outlets including this make it in a smart home like when to turn this stuff off I'd like to explore with you if there's a way that we might co creative package together or make a cross reference to each other since we don't know each other that well although I've heard of you by reputation I was wondering if you'd be open to talking about what we both do some more and what could be the most lois way to sort of exploring some kind of shared tips or help for our market it was the same not oh this is cool so again that was off the top of my mind but again you're acknowledging what they do well, what they do and what they do well um how you also serve that market in some way and say I'd like to explore with you um some ways we do it together um with someone like this they talked your partner first and say who's going to be they partner which of the two of you has a idea? Would you mind coming up and let me just see, I know I haven't given you much time at all um but I should warn you about that coming up on what they're thinking is so we actually just going to a little more detail about the you me asked approach really stand alone is I think a few people, the chat rooms or just a bit confused about what that means. Oh, sure, but first I dress your interest because you are involved in helping people with certain neurological problems solve things such as insomnia. Um I've noticed there several other things that they often have problems with two or they want and two of them are things that I provide to some of the same kind of people. So I just migrate over that afraid to sit down and I would like to explore with you if there's a way that since we share that mutual market there might be some things we can do tio together to see it for apt his allies um such as shares some tips to that mutual market so first it was you what your expertise is my acknowledgement they understand it me that I share that market to some degree offering other things and us can we explore away that we might do something together like pull a mailing list to make a one time offer or maybe share some tips online? Um so that people see us and then low paid up to discussion so it is simple and not simple um and it takes some rehearsal and certainly the people are rehearsing for the first time here we aren't expecting polish we're just expecting learning um so why don't you you're the one who's has a potential partner in mind so could you tell her and us what that potential partner is and then, um try to recruit that person yes emphasis on no polish angela I will represents a potential partner for us enroll being the w w e, which is a wrestling american based wrestling group, right? And really looks like that kind of represent definitely yeah and probably the representative of the education department or, you know, the, um, uh, community outreach, whatever position that might be and then within role we're you know, creating this collaborative online learning environment to reach out to a lot of parents and kids and um and dads and sons so to me just yes, I think you should dive in tokyo ignore me completely, I won't do that, but so thank you for meeting with me today. I just really admire the way that you've created heroes for these young boys and a way to relate to their dads. Andi, you've really reached out in the community for literacy programs, anti drug programs, and, you know, these role models that, uh, you know, really connect families together in this sort of unique kind of wild way that are really life superheroes of sorts that our characters that the's young men can can, you know, find his role models and connect with their dads. So I think that in some of that outreach, there might be a really great opportunity, since what we do is within education, that you might be able to increase that market a little bit and, you know, bring in some of the larger group of the family and, you know, whether it's an event or maybe we could talk about, you know, some of your initiatives in literacy or, you know, getting kids to stay in school, to go to college, and then we can kind of hash out some ideas how to work together and promote each other. Sure, well, well, first I have supporting families, students and athletes, I follow mobility watt and I like to stand because it promotes proper lineman um I first before I you know, jump on border even get in depth with any questions I have for you specifically what makes you wake up and be passionate about your business? Sure, well, I think that there is a very large underserved population is in public schools that are not seeing positive role models that are not getting the appropriate level of learning being encouraged to really six seed, you know, beyond just going to class every day that's not success it's really true learning and mastery of subjects so that these students and families can get out of, you know, an economic under privileged status and really find success and within their passions. Sure, another question I have is sunday night you have a lot on your mind what are some of those thoughts that are still lingering on your brain? And you can't you can't fall asleep what is what's still what's challenging for? You are exciting for you that you know limits you being able tio tow, fall into sleep? Sure, um well I would say that's one of the things that I really look for is mastery of subject and I think that students are learning how to be really good study er's, but they're not learning how to specifically master specific subjects and if we can get that passion to pass on, I know for me my passion is education but how can we give a student a passion for something that they can follow through with whether, for the short term of the long term, than makes learning really fun? And I would say, that's, what really keeps me up is helping sues fine mastery through passion, sure, and that that resonates strongly with me. I believe in educating the whole child to not just academically and cognitively, but socially, emotionally, in all those aspects. Now, what is what do they enrolled? Tutors have to offer that a typical classroom teacher would not. I'm part of the national association of the education of young children and some other danger foundation. So what can your tutor's bring that my collaborators and fellow educators cannot necessarily bring to the table? Yeah, so big revolution that's happening in education right now is that it's called a blending, learn, blended learning or flip classroom, where you receive the information at home, and then the teacher plays the role of the coach in the classroom. So it's, basically, you learn at home, and you bring your homework to the classroom, and you kind of workshop it out as a team with your teachers, so that when you get stuck on a design or thinking problem, if you get stuck the teachers right there to coach you through it, rather than doing the writing or the work work at home, and so I think that there's still another level of that, though the online tutoring can provide where if the student wants to continue with something over the weekend, or even, you know, summer break or the holidays, when students should be continuing that learning, and especially if you do, and still that level of passion for that mastery, that you still need that one to one support at some points during some of that online learning. So I think that by aggregating and pulling together this incredible amount of content video, two dimensional content that is that learning opportunity that you might still get stuck and needs someone to one support and that's where the tutor's will step in. Great thank you good sequence could see how much you learned there's a phrase that goes we're far more revealing by the questions we asked them, the answers we give and so there's a big all kinds of approaches there's no right or wrong, but the chance for you to learn the way she assesses you and its values first. And then it goes to what's missing that you can provide me that we have, and so some people reverse it and have the other logic and say, just tell me what you have what how is it going to help us so either way I'm sure you would have done those perfectly well your goal I call it speaking to the sweet spot of mutual benefit and to refer back if someone approaches you or the other and so you got to that within just a few minutes so you found the sweet spot you found out that she didn't know what she was talking about and you did with that I'm pushing so those are things that we're looking for she seems to know what she's talking about I want to verify it other places she did already get to the low risk approach to doing it and she was evident in her passion she also gets to verify that she knows what she's talking about she didn't try to go first well how will it help our programs but you do want address that later on so that's a pretty good start thank you very much for someone just curious actually then this may not work but I'm going to give you a try what about reversing wait let's have everybody have a chance of this but do you really think the other the other side ok as you I'll be your partner or no yeah she reverse roles right here okay so you'll be a woman you know that she's the one on the on call stand okay completely put e school batch and you could be enrolled you could be yourself okay all right hi, it's. Well, welcome, it's. Nice to meet you. I've heard so many wonderful things about you. Through social media and through word of mouth, my name's, angela, and with school match. How are you today? Good racing. Teaching islam so excited that you've heard about us. It's it's nice to hear that. We're getting some presence that cameras we do need to have you seated. I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry, there's. So, it's, great to see you. And, um, I love toe first listen and hear about what? What you know, what's your mission and what really you know, makes you passionate about what you do. So tell me more about enrolled in what you're giving your mission statement. Sure, enroll is basically online collaborative learning for the next level. So if you can imagine a lot of things we do in life, you go to your phone, you go to yelp to find a restaurant, you go to apple to find media amazon to find goods, but there's not really anything out there to aggregate and pull together online learning content. And so we really want to provide that as a service for everybody out there so they can really compare contrast and get a sort of crowd sourced input to decide how to best gain a skill or master subject, get into college, find a doctorate program whatever level it might be there's really one place that you can go to do that and then me, we do that we have a support system of online tutors, which we've got about three hundred thousand tutors now that has pre registered and we we're really excited about offering this one to one service on top of your general search. Yeah, well, congratulations on your success thus far in the future looks very bright for u s o it's school match. We help parents find the most appropriate education setting for their children, andi help them through that process of enrollment are there? Are there any questions you have for myself for about our platform, our about our our model and working with schools and families? Yeah, I'd love to hear particularly about your demographic if you're really focused on that sort of pre k and kindergarten level, you know there's such a need there for small children moving around and for parents is their social aspect, so that some of these parents can connect and help each other out because that's such a huge part of our mission yes, great question that's very important to us and not only is pre k important to us, but also reaching everyone, so making school choice equitable in all different social demographics so what we have on our platform is we do have a way for parents to collaborate parents that may not necessarily be I have the same kind of access to those resources we provide on a platform that's available on their mobile device, as most families have a smart a smart phone so they can they can collaborate, they could get testimonials and customer feedback other parents using the platform to find the most appropriate school for their child. I love that, and I think in education working with parents, teachers, kids, they're also busy, you have to meet them where they're available, which is why mobile first is ah, huge credit I think that there's a really great potential we do so much, I think we've got some great resources and partners on the college readiness side, but I think that in creating that collaboration from the young age as well, it's really a gap for us, it's a really a need for us that we don't have appropriate partner there, that we could really help each other out. So here you have two people there clearly passionate and knowledgeable, right, and their seven situation where they're convivial, so you want to think of a situation what may not always be that convivial and the notion is, how soon can you get to the sweet spot? And starting with it. So if you research them ahead of time and you guys know each other and have such a strong bond, so if you research that your goals again state because you serve this group and these ways, we also serve that group and here's some ways that we can add value to you, and I think we can both stand out better in our market so that plain language is important and then when you do, the detail is detail related to the sweet spot about what you might work, then you get closer to scene if there want to experiment, so sometimes people are restless um, not painful attention, they may be on the phone, so getting to that us part sooner is sometimes cell phone, and now you probably been reduced by friends and you're already ready to like each other. And if even I don't want a partner, you're gonna be friendly, so that really fits set. And you were checking out where the gaps were that you could feel so all I'm saying is prepare for the worst case scenario and enjoyed the up case of you d'oh and it's hard because we know most about our stuff, so this is a pretty good start, thank you very much way leave we actually wanted to hear from our studio audience what you thought of this on any any suggestions on what they did well, what you thought they maybe could have done better, and he thought you had while they were going through that interaction. Most of it went over my head. Honestly, it z's air topics they know so much about and I know nothing about, and I don't have kids, so I'm still not sure exactly what they dio honestly, I don't know, but that's the classrooms and all that was impressive stuff that some of us know, yeah, so yeah, was there a question in there? There is no carry. What what do you think about the interaction of visible in terms of, I think that's what I was saying get sooner to the sweet spot of mutual interest and focus on that person assume, you know and your trust you're trying to verify because you do this, this and this we do these things and they appear to dovetail. I'd like to tell you more about what we do and see if there's a way we can work together, because the goal is to headline your comment and then elaborate so few headline, an elaborate it tells him. I thought of two way, so it's it's like a pyramid style and a newspaper, I thought of two ways we might be able to collaborate on a low risk way to see if we're a benefit. So you're giving them headline about how to feel about what your next gonna tell him. So it's like signaling it it's hard to be brief about stuff we're passionate about, it really is. So you assume that most people get hit on for a variety of reasons, a lot. So we want to be brief and go to that part that's only part say that credibility clearly goes up high, and you two already know a lot of each other's worlds aa lot of people may not cause we're going about divers allies say market, but I don't get what you do it all that could be the thing yeah, yes toe offer a tip. You know, you could do a lot of meetings with potential strategic partners and there's a pretty high flake factor because other priorities takeover, so in fact, her meaning they don't follow through on the discussion of the action that you identify as a consequence of the conversation as a consequence have been a great conversation, but you never hear from them again or it seems like it's taking so one of things that I do is you just make a little social contract up front and I say no, I want to appreciate you taking the time to meet with me and looking forward to exploring this conversation to see if it's a mutual benefit to us and at the end of this meeting we can decide if it's a good fit or not and if it's not a good fit than that's, ok? And if it is a good fit if we could just agree to identify the next step that we're going to take and when are you speaking as a person that's being approached or the person that's approaching I'm speaking of a person both ways actually because what happens is if this is a very social conversation but in the end of the day it's business you need to figure out what the next step is you have to build to say, you know, it just doesn't it's on a fit something it's okay son, if it so anyway, I just that's my that's just from my experience that that helped the conversations move along to a productive action versus just sit in the beginning this got the actual social contract in the beginning at the end of this we're going to do something or not going to do something I can imagine you're saying putting together lists and you know that if the two of us were to say, you know, the top twenty ways finding a school for your preschooler versus finding a college because these air probably younger parents maybe aren't as far away, you know, five six ships and acknowledge a benefit so her yes that the two of us could create a list together, right? Like what you were suggesting before, where you know, top twenty ways that, you know, getting into kindergarten and getting into college or similar right parent guidance and yes, I want to go back to respond to her I don't think that because that's a good point and somewhat different I think the initiative of the person was initiating I should say as the concert this conversation I see some ways we might follow up, so sometimes you want to close it and say it's the end of this I don't think we may be a match what do you think it could close or you may want to leave a space to think about it then you say, oh, and light of what we've said here, the things that I think that it might be the best methods let me think about a bit more and send you something and let's talk again if you like, so you can leave it open whatever, but the person initiating has got to keep up initiative and I would I would have to that I would um I was about to say next actions but I would say, you know, we could partner maybe we need to think about if not I will contact you next monday um send you an email or contact you by b a phone next monday just give a really specific time so they can they can anticipate it and then it's just, you know says next actions which people kind of like something concrete it's variable because some people won't be available at that time but what I would say is have a specific date and give them something in writing so they can stare at it whether fastest the listeners that it shows your concrete miss can you could be a lot more concrete that way so the things we learned our brevity showing demonstrating up front that you know something about them that you have a similar market that you want explore doing things together um and you had some ideas but you opened a different one or maybe in fact wouldn't talk someone we won't weigh are a good match is she was saying so well yeah, you know what? We could learn a lot this way just by some things don't occur to you until you actually up here doing it this fun thank you, thank you, thank you very much yes it's a mental edge so, curry, one of the things that comes up for me when we're talking about these things is that when I've been talking to people for other potential collaborations is that it starts to sound like a sales pitch, it starts to sound like I'm selling them a service as opposed tio creating a partnership that's why I say sos difference in the language there is that social contact like and saying, like, uh, we're staying on the same level here, I'm not trying to pitch something that you're going to buy from me. I'm trying to figure out how we can partner and have a cohesive, you know, relationship, so I get I hear you. Yeah, I understand the exchange of here's what I appreciate about you and here's what I do, but how do you keep it from selling, sounding like a cell? I don't know how to say it differently this so I might have failed on that part to me. The things that people usually do is continue to talk about their business, us, and then it does feel like sales, the more I will say because I write to calms assad button all kinds of professional pr people and others pitch me with generalities that have nothing to do with what I do, and now that I've been doing, partner said the same thing it's so where that I think when you think about where it is that you actually demonstrate you understand their market and what they do up front and you suggest I think we have will you both serve some of the same kinds of clients I want to explore and you're not just faking it? You mean I want explore whether we could do something better together uh in a form of partnership and to do it even if were to do that to do in a lois way that's a sequence it's like the steps across the pond see, I didn't take a long time to say that then I say first so I guess it's a confirmed that you believe you're going after this market too and then say, um you might want to ask me questions too I can just tell you briefly about my business on my organization and let's see if some of these methods makes sense because talking really directly and openly about it we can agree that maybe it isn't or it isthe and I would definitely agree having some form of action including saying, you know, it seems like I was stretching I misunderstood we reached different markets and you do it very well our first one of the others to say that and saying up front I just want this toe to explore this helps to set it up he had a gun a question come in from the chat room and it's kind of a statement, but I think they're looking for some advice within, and we also had a few people mentioned that they do relate to and feeling that that sales, the type of feeling they want to find a way around it, and then curio, so also brought up an interesting point, abby lynn, as well, that they feel a little reluctance when they're finding a partnership, because it's a little bit like giving up a bit of control, and that is scary to them, and they're saying, like they'd love to find a partnership. But how do you get around and trusting somebody else to do as good of a job as you can? You can't get around it. That's, why you trust and that's absolutely important thing to realize, but it's also why the partnerships that people go ahead and do it's also like asking somebody out, and they turn you down. It hurts your feelings. Sometimes you will see some things generally a worthwhile, and they don't. So I understand it's ironic, having spoken at dreamforce, being around all these sales go getters, I believe, may understand that's sort of fake humanity, not that every was acting that way, borrowing shut of some people trying to so they're being nice and friendly how is your family? It just turns me off, so but I profoundly believe from the bottom my heart from my firsthand experience when you show as specific knowledge and interest in somebody else and you're willing to be open and hear what they say and again, this is very uncommon and you respond to what they just said say what you brought up was this and I think these are some things that would concern me too or whatever see there's less of a threat and conversations in the u s then used to be it's more like a ping pong ball, so it's even we're not selling and you don't have to be a robot you have to be very grounded then think I'm going to answer their question first worse than that, we usually give background first on qualifiers and sometimes forget the question is that is really getting bigger so the idea that someone is actually listening to you responding it's pretty compelling and not to force it if it's not something that interests him on a lot of people be your best partners say I really want to think about this some more because you want to check you out, which is smart, so I guess it's in light of that that you have a path forward um and it's not for the faint of heart on the other hand, you don't have to necessarily be bold. Some of my best ones, where I just got so in sync and was clear, and I was able to be specific. And most of time, those people said, well, I like that. I really do. But I don't think that's the best method. So they got in, and they said, I think we should do this instead, and when you really open and listening, and they had a better idea than I did, you showing that you're you can't fake trying to be flexible on when you're flexible and you say, well, that's, great, ah, and it is a back and forth soon that's, one of the few ways that you get over that, I'm trying to sell you it's, mutuality.