Lose Weight Without Dieting

 

Lose Weight Without Dieting

 

Lesson Info

Psychology of Health & Exercise

So I'm going to get now a little bit into more of the psychology of health, and so we were talking a bit about the bullying and the culture of the office, and we're going to get into a little bit of how we can approach that in a very tactful way, so we keep our jobs and keep our friends and don't have to go down this this path of super bad health. So the first thing that's really important to understand is that you probably noticed, I know jane has noticed that people have really, really strong emotional opinions about food and health have you noticed? Like either like we talked about this there, either on, like one side of this of the spectrum where they're like, health is stupid, you know, are so are like, this is a waste of time, you're stupid and like, they make you feel bad for caring about your health. And then on the other side of the spectrum, you've got your like uber healthy judge er's who are telling you like what you're doing isn't good enough, and you're sort of a failure ...

for, you know, letting yourself um letting yourself not make the right decisions when you know I'm all self right just up on my high horse and I make these decisions how come you're not doing it so but all those people are jerks and they're tough to deal with and they have very strong opinions and but one thing that I really want to stress and this is it this was a critical insight for me dealing with people like this because I get this flag a lot too, right? I'm like eating salads and everybody else is like having pizza and I here's the stuff like this and I won thing I learned is that the reactions from people those are emotional reactions, they're not rational, they will rationalize but you know, they will have explanations for these very strong opinions, but the truth is that like there's no argument you can make against them that are going to get them to change their minds for the most part. And so sort of, you know, I feel like our our natural reaction is to get a little defensive back in response but it's important remember that that we're going to do any good because they're not being rational there being emotional and they've got, you know, probably something happened in their childhood that makes them hate vegetarians so much or whatever, you know something or like I've had people who really associate a thin people are being thin with being mean and even though their health was in jeopardy they didn't wantto change their own behavior to try tio lose weight and get healthy because when they were a kid they were bullied by means skinny girls and so they're like I don't want to be that kind of person and so I am not going to even try for my own health and you know that's another limiting belief and it's really it's really sad but it also makes sense and so it's important understand that that comes from a very emotional place and you're not going to like win an argument with this person. So the number one piece of advice I have when you are dealing with you're trying tio disappear like I try to, like deflect attention from my own food choices if they're not in line with the people around me and the number one thing you khun dio is not more allies the choices right like do not make this about I'm being good I'm being or you're not being good do not make it about anything except your own personal feelings because when what? Because what happens with people let's say you're making a healthy food choice I mean and you enjoy it and you you don't feel anything strongly about it but when you are shunning the doughnuts you know or whatever at the meeting everybody else that's eating the donuts is their inclination is going to feel a little bit judged they're going to like you think that's bad therefore you think what I'm doing is bad and so I'm going to get a little angry with you because you're judging me that's I mean it's not that rational but that's the emotional state that's happening and so what I would recommend you do is save anybody ever confront you with this sort of this sort of thing and says you know why don't you come on man just have one just have one it's so good you're missing out instead of saying I'm trying to be good which is going to put people on the defensive say you know I'm just I've been really groggy lately I'm just trying to see if this is going to help me feel a little bit better because people can relate to wanting to solve a personal problem and you know I want to get more energy you want to feel a lot better but they they get defensive when you think you're there being you more allies the food choices and you're doing something good and they're doing something bad does that make sense that read like does that sound like it worked it worked really really well few people are going to be really, really controversy like confronting when that's the answer you get when you're just contents there's like I'm just trying this yeah you guys do what you want you know I'm quite jealous seeing a little bit, you know, go for it people like okay, you know, let us know how that experiment goes, eh? So that's really, really powerful and where that comes from, of course we get backto language it's the words you choose to describe your choices, you know, it's not good or bad I'm not trying to be good I'm trying to figure out how I feel really, really powerful. So this is another way of saying, don't be a buzzkill um, so our typical natural response is there going to be to get defensive so don't don't get too defensive don't feel like you need to defend your actions against other people. You're just doing an experiment uh be lighthearted use humor um, it can be ah, you know, like on and I'm saving my heart attack for later, you know, you could just you could just sort of joke around or make playful comments that make it seem like you're not taking yourself too seriously because it's it's, when you start taking yourself seriously that people start thinking you're kind of a jerk, one thing you can do to is if you're out of rust strong with people like this don't draw extra unnecessary attention to yourself david watch breaking bad george howell thanks so there's this character lydia who's this very uptight woman and every time she goes tio a coffee shop she orders a camomile tea with soy milk in stevia and it's like when you do that like you're just inviting people to think you're like a stuck up jerk about your food, right? So instead of saying like I want uh uh, a salad with the dressing on the side and no cheese and no crew thons you know, just like all the steak with a little blue cheese and a little side salad and like some extra veggies would be great too, but you don't have to make it, you know, stately all those air although they're healthy choices, right? And so not drawing attention to, you know, sort of more like red light words and just sort of crew be creative in the way you order and what and the way you describe it to the waiter and the people at the table happy honesty we already kind of touched on this, but basically just being very comfortable in your own skin and say, you know, I'm just doing them experiments, you know, I feel this isn't about you, you know, it's tell me and sometimes I resort to harmless lies, you know, sometimes people are like, come on, just just have the have the cake or whatever like you know I had a big breakfast and the truth is I'm going to the gym later and I don't want to feel like a bloated and have it ruined my work out but they don't need to know that you know sometimes it's just not worth it having a confrontation especially if it's somebody you don't particularly care about them you just wanted off your back I think there's nothing wrong with us and lasts when you're foodists we've already so we spent all day yesterday talking about how we have these amazing ingredients that were super excited about and are delicious so when one thing that I've done to disarm a lot of people is offer what I'm eating because it's usually delicious you know, like when you have a salad like that tell it that you guys were eating earlier I was jealous it was beautiful when you have a delicious food you know if you've got a piece of fruit or something you can share and, you know, sort of get people with him over a little bit with delicious food because what they're what they're reacting negatively against what the health is the like moralizing of the health that ever be like delicious food whether it's healthy or not so you can always get you know you can even sometimes when people over with was sharing a little bit of your your deliciousness another great thing to do at the office and this one is really, really strong is create the a buddy system if you can find at least one other person in the office and is almost always one person who wishes they were a little healthier but haven't quite figured it out if you compare up with that person or better yet, a couple of different people and work together to create a few healthy habits at the office that is so much more powerful thing going it alone. I mean, first of all, you have that accountability for that other person, but also as a team, you are no longer like the lone weirdo who's eating something healthy for lunch. You are now like a trendsetter like, you know, we're doing this thing, you know, when cem groups get together like we're going to run a five k together, you know, it's way less weird than I'm just going to exercise by myself, you know, people think people can just relate a little bit more and it just feels more like a team unless isolating so you move from the category of, like, weirdo to trendsetter that's a really good place to be, and sometimes you can actually recruit even more people when she starts something like that, so that is a very powerful technique in the office and so I just said somebody always wants to join, so we need to spend a little bit of time on exercise you haven't done that yet um, we've talked a lot about food and food is really, really important, especially if weight loss is a goal, but exercise is probably the single most important thing you can do for your health and I said probably I'm not going to take that probably out exercise is the single most important thing you khun dio toe live better to live free of disease and to live longer it's incredibly powerful it's gotten a bad rap lately because it's not as effective for weight loss but it is essential for weight maintenance and in terms of just how you look and physique if that matters to you it no matter no matter your size we're in better shape. You look better like absolutely guaranteed I just said that and and I and this is true for both men and women, by the way, some some I know that women could be resistant to certain kinds of exercise don't be it's the best it's really the best and I love this quote by joey adams who's a comedian that if it weren't for the fact that the tv set in the refrigerator so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all just only true and I just want to focus on that actually is a form of exercise form of exercise that is called neat so that's non exercise activity thermo genesis and that's just another way of saying all the calories you burn by moving around in your life you know not I'm not talking about going to the gym I'm not talking about running on the treadmill I'm talking about taking the stairs up to your office you know, doing the laundry, doing gardening, doing cleaning the house walking to work, you know, taking in the parking a little farther away and, you know, maybe getting off the bus stop early to get a few extra steps in and uh as a zone measurements for that kind of activity I love and I'm a huge advocate of ten dollars and stuff today, so I wear the parameter I always get ten thousand steps a day and it's great, so um and see so it doesn't need to be formal and the most important thing is that you're less sedentary, so get a predominant er and we just talked about those take the take the long route standing and treadmill desks are a great option to be less sedentary walking meetings like we talked about earlier and if you drink lots of water you have to make a lot of extra trips to the bathroom and since we're talking about lunch at work, we're going to go do a little trip through the kitchen and see what it's like and how to make this students in an office setting how to optimize for health but still the things that better delicious our students are actually gonna lead the way so you take the lead ladies and gentlemen this is actually me by the way don't be recognized me here first thing this morning on my way into work but ari this is actually a big chance for a lot of people food brought into the office I mean it's just temptation in front of you yes so I mean, what about you? What are your thoughts on how we've talk to bill about resistance and peer pressure et cetera but what your overall forthis let's walk yeah so for me again that the biggest challenge is to optimize both health and happiness so obviously if you choose something that doesn't taste good all day long you're going to break down. That takes too much willpower. However, you know if you just indulge every day and work we've talked about work is not a special occasion you're going to be adding thousands potentially of extra calories every week that you don't even think I really worth it no you are you all right? So what I do when I'm going into a situation where you know, I'm knowing that this is a decision that's important but I'm gonna be making in every single day I'm gonna focus number one on vegetables you know I want to make you go back to the foodists plate and remember that half your plate should be vegetables and then minimize sort of the things we talked about as being the least optimal food so anything with sugar on it anything with a lot of processed flour, a lot of processed oils or process me I'm going to avoid and stick with the more real foods and then just load up the second half of my plate with some sort of proteins I'm satisfied throughout the day and then maybe some sort of start just to quench those carb cravings and I think we all get after thinking really hard all day now something we talked about a lot of creative life that we really have fantastic food brought in for us every day you're tio got played thank god thank god yeah I'm coming for you you go first what do you what do you think of today spread and healthy options I mean I think it's great I think this is pretty typical you know there is some some more healthy options or some little looks like a little rich your food's over here so my number one is I gravitate toward this this is fresh it looks beautiful we're really lucky that we have this these beautiful greens and all this so this is going to be a fantastic choice if you're not in the mood for salad and you want something a little warmer, this looks great to me this looks really delicious and and I love that there's a healthy vinaigrette here, so it seems like I would maybe used this to spruce up anything that looked a little, um less inviting, but I really wanted to eat more so let's say I definitely someone here because it's dry, but if this needed a little more flavor because maybe there is it looks like it might not have been cooked with as much salt as maybe I would have used when salt makes vegetables taste better. I know there's going to be some salt in here so that might that might help spruce set up, but I'm not sure yet I'd have to taste it first. Moving on I mean mashed potatoes, I'm a a lot of people are scared of potatoes I'm not because potatoes they're still a real food, you know it's not like some people, said it's worse than white bread? I totally disagree I mean not not that you should be loading up on it needing a ton, but I wouldn't stress out too much about it my biggest fear would be whatever is mixed in there within and I would just be careful about that, but this says it's infused with basil pesto sounds delicious so I think this is a great choice on why that was green. Yeah, there's basically, you're identified that first great story and the race is going to I think I have no problem with rice, either. I think a lot of people are nervous about potatoes and rice, and I don't think you need to be again. I wouldn't make it half my plate, but I would definitely a quarter of the plate is a great, great option. Fantastic. And then we get into the hot food hot, so let's see, all of it looks pretty good, my biggest concern and a situation like this, we're gonna have a very saucy think I don't know what's in that sauce, so it says here that's a chilly, chilly sauce, but I don't know if this should you're in there and I would be a little bit wary of the sauce owed, I would tend to lean toward a less saucy dish, so this looks like a delicious fish that's poached salmon. Yes, I would probably lean toward the poached salmon just because if there's even you know five to ten grams of sugar and which is not unheard of in a sauce like this it's going to be more in the desert category? Well, I think because this girl tried to pass sort eight sun dried tomatoes and red wine source that's not santa, but you're right it's going to be a little heavier and I prefer to save my heavier, more indulgent meals for I want to get home with my husband and you're got to dinner with friends, so for me that's going to be my priority? So here, even though there's french fries on here that's a music, I would probably I would probably pick around those, but I would I would I would my number one priority would be avoiding that sauce same thing here this is the vegetarian option with it's a green curry tofu in my experience, these tend to be really sweet if you're vegetarian thing, you don't have a lot of choice things, but you could go over there but, you know, typically milky sauces I try to avoid during the week, so I think, but overall, the I think one of the points we could make here is just plenty to dio, you know, there's plenty of choices and you're not going to be, you know might not be the best meal you've ever had in your life, but you can certainly eat something satisfying and something good for you without really feeling like you indulged when you I didn't really want to be indulging seen salinger's niles made with french rights before because you can just eat this reminds me of something my little brother would have made when he was like seven and french fries on everything like stick him in burritos. So good. Good. I'm glad that you got a seven year old chess. We're glad you approve. What do you think that it was good to you for our students went to get I dive in? Fantastic, so I know that we're going to talk a little more about exercise when we come back for our next segment. What else can we expect? We will also be discussing how to talk to friends and family about getting healthy because they could be some of the biggest influences in our lives and at the same time also attends a very there's a lot of people we care about deeply that's my dad, it was very unhealthy for a while and I wanted to influence his behavior, and then we're going to talk about how to do that, which is a very delicate art, but we will get to it doesn't looking forward to it.

Class Description

It’s time to take control of your weight, energy, and happiness. Join nutrition expert, food writer, and neuroscience PhD Darya Rose to learn a science-based approach to sustainable weight loss. Getting healthy and losing weight doesn’t need to be a restrictive, joyless process — it’s as easy as changing your mindset.

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  • Overcoming habits that have held you back in the past
  • Meal planning, whether you’re cooking at home or dining out
  • The role of mindfulness in transforming your body and outlook
  • The importance of having a system of behaviors, not goals
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    If you’re ready to leave restrictive meal plans and fad diets behind, this course will give you the mindset and tools you need to upgrade your habits and live a healthier life.