Where do you start? - Dealing with the Demon Inside
Okay we've talked a lot about life goals about making plans about strategizing and about prioritizing right well today we're going to talk a lot about doubt so first things first you guys I want you to take out the paper take out a piece of paper and your sharpie okay do you have a little artistic assignment here they're all sitting I mean looking what you're gonna make us teo you ready okay I want you to look to your neighbor it could be you know either side of you whatever if you have if you're on the end it'll be one side and you have thirty seconds to draw your neighbor start now watching the clock try your neighbor dry yourself if you're at home twenty seconds ten seconds hurry draw their whole face make happen five four three two one stop ok holding up I want to see show it to your friend okay do you hear all the giggles in the lab you're all embarrassed aren't you uh you're embarrassed aren't you? Of course you are. Why? Because adults fear judgment this was mine of myself my ch...
allenge to myself what's not left my left my pen lift off the page so that's why I have this like random slash mark it looks like some serial killer one took a knife across my name yeah adults fear judgment artistry is anguished guys isn't it I mean we're all a tormented bunch and creating art is so tied to our self worth because it is creativity is our soul speaking out we are saying when we create art that is truly us this is my authentic me do you like it and yes I just asked you in thirty seconds to draw faith but it was truly you you may not have a ton of skill a drawing but it was truly you and so when you show that to someone and laugh and giggle you know it doesn't look like them you know your shore just freaking pounding on you even when you're laughing and giggling you all just experienced george on steroids didn't you like every day it happens to us okay I want to give you a little bit of a history lesson in the days of the greco roman empire creativity was thought to be a divine entity that bestowed upon you your ideas okay the ancient artists was protected by their creative spirit the greeks called this character damon and the romans called it genius huh? Little footballs for those of you who watched ace ventura pet detective it's a family thing then came that's inside family joke sorry then came the enlightenment okay all of a sudden in the renaissance right creativity is humanity focused all of a sudden you are a genius for creating something beautiful damon and genius demon and genius see it how this started pressure that's a lot of pressure for something that was supposed to be divinely inspired to us now all of a sudden it's coming from within us and if it's not good it sucks and if it's great you're genius who am I describing yes you all know we love him okay this image was first I love this picture have you noticed they have sweat dripping down his head it's the wife beater to me that just like makes the image to me just like yeah that's george on my shoulder in a wife beater with sweat dripping down his face oh nasty why don't listen to him who is this thing who is george? Well he wears one heck of a lot of disguises embarrassment you all just had it today thirty seconds ago procrastination when you procrastinate that is george perfectionism that is george guilt shame in security his mission is to beat you up lower your self esteem focus on the negative described distract you from your dream and give you imposter syndrome to tell you that you are an imposter that you will never be a professional photographer you are trying to fool people he's a thief and a liar he steals the truth he still to your truth from you what is george really fear saulius his job is to shame you into not doing something he wants to tell you how horrible you are so you won't take risk but creativity is naturally a gamble when you sign up for a creative life, you sign up to gamble what is gambling mean? It means putting your heart and soul into something with no certain outcome entrepreneurs campbell business owners gamble it's part of the territory so if you can't handle the gamble, get out of the game it is george is never going away he will always be there but as erin said, lock him up in the frickin basement and bound and gagged him george isn't going anywhere. Why not? Because creativity the natural end result of creativity is uncertainty. We don't know how it's going to turn out you make an image, you run a business, you think of an idea that you want to put into your photography you know how it's gonna turn out really? I mean, you have an idea. You know you wanted to go somewhere, but you don't know if it's gonna work or not right uncertainty is the name of the game and fear hates uncertainty got sphere in itself, right? I'm afraid to fly for some reason I have this weird messed up intention that I won't get there that there's an uncertain outcome, so I'm afraid of it it's irrational? Yes, I do realize that no one ever said I was not crazy why does george do this to us? Why does he make us so afraid why does he give us every excuse in the world finally beating us down with a stick saying you suck to try to stop us from doing something? What do you think? This voices, voices, microphones, microphones? Anyone wanna contribute? Why does george on a daily basis try to annihilate us? Human nature, it is instinctual is survival. Anything new is dangerous, as greg would say from the crew says, if you have kids have seen the cruise um it's, a dreamworks picture it's about cave man people on drug is the leader. He is the father figure of the clan and all these other people in the clan want to go looking for new things to try to get away from there. Bad situation and he's all no change is dangerous. Anything new is dangerous. He is george personified into a prehistoric human beings. I mean, it's really funny. If you watch this movie, it relates so much to creativity new adventure and fear. It is that in a cartoon, anything new is dangerous. That's george's m o so his intentions are very good, but they're extremely misplaced, right? Because what george doesn't understand is that if you pursue this risk this campbell you are going to grow regardless of the outcome, right and growth is the whole point being on this planet is to like grow and become a better person and die knowing you contributed something to the society and that you're a good person and on we go right that's kind of the m o of a planet george does everything he can do to stop it here's another little thing about george you are the only one who can slay him okay you are a superhero balance okay again elizabeth gilbert when my favorite authors she was I just read her book called big magic and she was telling a story of when she was a child like she has a lot of experience with fear she's a writer and she's creative and I relate to that and she said that she has she's an authority on fear okay why's that well throughout her entire childhood she was scared of everything bugs blankets that weren't turned down correctly grass that was too sharp I mean anything she was scared of everything and her mother was a tough job she would say oh liz get it together you know she bitch slap her and make her maker put up with it like any good parent would write she used to take great pride in her fears like she would like make the world revolve around her fears you know how kids can do that like a scary movie it was like an intense like an attention thing my son does it sometimes too and she made a wonderful quote she said argue for your limitations and you get to keep them if you defend your fears why are you doing that? She used her fears to identify herself what happened so much when george hits us right where it hurts what happens he says you know you did something I made a mistake last week and I really felt guilty over and started to get shameful about it you know I can't believe I did that that was such a mistake I feel so terrible and george it was just like hounding me about it like you suck I can't believe you did that was so unprofessional yada yada yada and I'm sitting here going right right I do suck horrible we all agree with him for some reason when we're really feeling down you agree with george don't you at least defend yourself when somebody like that gets after you so when that voice in your head starts saying you saw at least defend yourself at least stand up and go wait a minute now I really don't know maybe not and get curious about the issue what caused it and how you can solve it instead of retreating into this well of shame that's part of what it means to have empathy with yourself is even dips defending against george okay fear is a mass produced commodity available on the shelves of any generic box store everybody's fear is the same how boring is that creativity is notch more interesting right everybody's fear is the same okay we all know it because we all say it to ourselves right so you have a choice do I want to be boring and let my fear identify me or will I have the courage to create and grow this business that I love so much creativity is for the brave there is always an inherent risk with creativity and george will always show up when you are trying to be creative or innovative why innovation asks you to enter into the realm of an uncertain outcome and fear hate uncertainty so george and innovation and creativity are synonymous with one another and the problem is is that shame is driving the day in car comparisons in the front seat and blames trying tow in the back seat trying to control everything okay shame is in the front seat driving comparison is his sidekick in the passenger seat you're comparing yourself to everybody else and shame is just driving into the dumps blame is in the back seat going it's so and so's fault my competition is shooting and burning and killing me I can't keep up with it you blame it on everybody you want an easy solution out because it hurts you don't want blame driving you off a cliff you really don't okay so think about that next time you start to hear blame in your head you start to hear yourself got I can't compete, these people's prices air so down your bring your mind starts to go external. That means george is attacking you, and you are ashamed of something that you're not doing correctly or that some failure has happened and you need to fix it, fear, deeply instinctual and vital to survival. Of course it is, but it's not very smart write it doesn't know that if it just lets you be creative, you're going to grow and become a better person. Instead, it's on ly thing is to try to get you to survive short term, quick fix. Every animal in the world has an instinctual fear response. In her book, gilbert talked about how you can have a petri dish with a tadpole in and brush your hand across and they'll shrink in fear. Okay, do you really want to revolve your entire identity around fear, the most boring thing you possess? She calls it the panic reflex of your dumbest inner tadpole. Don't let that panic reflex control you.