Identifying Preferences: Listen
So in this segment we're going to be talking all about identifying preferences and maximizing channel mix what I mean by identifying preferences is figuring out at the individual customer level right? The individual audience member what do they prefer when it comes to your communications with them? What resonates with them best? What are their interest, whether they're hobbies? What are the ways that you can connect with them at a very deep and emotional and personal level in a way that doesn't feel creepy right? But feels like wow, they actually care about me the second part of this segment is going to focus on channel mix right there's so many different ways that you can interact with your customers that frankly, for the majority of us it really feels overwhelming we're going to talk about howto identify first of all, which are the ones that are most important to you then, which are the ones that are most important to your customers. And how do you align those two most businesses sto...
p at the, which is most important to us they don't really take into consideration their customers or their audience members and so we're going to shift and do that the entire session today can be summed up in one word listening it's really about using the two years we have I mean there's that age old quote, right? You know we have two ears and one mouth so theoretically we shouldn't listen twice as much as we talk yet that's not how any of our businesses operate in fact, the majority of our businesses operate like we have one mouth with a megaphone attached to it and our ears air taped back and don't work at all how often we've been in a situation when as a customer of another business we've been raising our hands saying I don't like this stop doing what you're doing I like you is a company I wanna work with you, but why are you doing this? This isn't a good choice. How many times have we gone to accompany and said, yeah, I I'd liketo complained about something I'd like to tell you about something and they're like, oh yes, yes, we'll get right on top of it and then you continue to interact with him and you're like, you didn't even listen you didn't even care recently I was in a restaurant and the waiter was how shall I put this had other priorities other than waiting on my table? And I actually because I was there with some clients went to the manager and I said, look, our waiter seems to be a little absent I'm not, you know, trying to get him in trouble I'm not trying to be a jerk, but if you could encourage him to frequent our table a little more it be fantastic oh yes yes mr coleman absolutely we will get that taken care of you know this is a special client dinner the waiter didn't get any better nothing changed now I like to think we were kind of in a situation where the majority of my clients may be noticed but did weren't too terribly affected by it but I got to say in an otherwise fantastic experience at that restaurant having that one interaction will I go back again maybe had that interaction been different if asked will I go back again? The answer would have been absolutely and I will recommend other people to go it's really about listening it's that simple so some of you when we're talking during this segment are going to go joey you know this isn't rocket surgery right? Brain surgery rocket signs right? It isn't rocket surgery I knew what I was saying right it's about listening this is really simple and we all as business owners I think have a tendency to over complicate it. You know, when we were kids we might have read one of these but looks right about curious george. What was interesting about curious george is he was curious like if I were to say curious a new word association at least in the united states a lot of people would say george right, we know this it would not be a bad idea. Tto hang this in your office next year computer next to your phone where you take customer calls to remind you bi curious ask questions bring it back to this keyword listening it's a whole page in the presentation to itself just one word listen because that's the big takeaway anybody have any guests who this gentleman is? Pardon me young no clothes dale carnegie. Okay. Dale carnegie who we've heard a lot about don't really ever see pictures of dale carnegie, right? So dale carnegie said that you can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people then you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you very true something we when we read that we hear that quote we're like yeah that's that makes good sense but how many of us do it how many of us go into a situation with the goal of getting the other person talking let's take it to my favorite analogy for our course dating the women in the room are all too familiar with this you go on a date with a guy and he is happy to tell you exactly how fabulous he is tell you all about his work tell you about his day tell you everything that's been going on why he's so amazing the awards he's won all these fantastic things about himself and you're sitting there going what am I ever going to get a chance to share am I ever gonna are you gonna ever seem interested in what's going on in my life or is this all about you often it's all about that right and sometimes in these interactions of like getting curious we have to be careful about how we do it right so again like on a first date you know asking someone so what religion do you practice not a bad idea to ask that question may be relevant but might not want to lead with that okay years ago I was on a date I kid you not first date this is not with my wife so let me save her from this conversation really clear I was on a date with a woman who we sat down at dinner we ordered our meal the waiter left and she said so let's talk about kids yeah and the women in the room are like oh my gosh the women in the room know that that's a wrong idea the guys they're just they're stunned the guys there like oh god you had one of those I've had one of those I've been there right not the thing to say to a guy in his mid twenties not a thing to say or thirties or forties or ever right now here's the thing and I don't mean to make light of children right it's important when you're in a dating relationship to know do we have the same end goal in mind if the end goal is marriage and children it's important to know that the same way with your customers it's important to know in the conversation do we have the same end goal in mind you want an awesome photographer for your wedding? You want some amazing beautiful greeting cards? You want a kick ass fantastic website that converts better than your current one does it's important to know those things right? But when we asked the question and how we ask the question is very, very important there's also wonderful clues that are out there and have any of you ever been in the situation where you realize that you start asking someone about something and they get really excited about it and they start telling you about it and more and more and you can kind of just sit back and let them go right? We all have those passions you often see it with someone who's a big fan of travel they love to talk about the trips they've taken someone who's a big fan of music well love to tell you about the group's they're interested art someone who's a big reader voracious reader will tell you all about the newest books they've read and you can kind of just sit back and let them go and what's great is that person loves that conversation how many of you have ever been in this situation? We have a conversation with somebody and you talk and you talk for a few minutes and then you leave and they either they leave or you leave the event for whatever it may be and you're like I really liked that person they were fantastic oh my gosh we had such a connection with such an awesome five and the person you're telling this story too is like really they tell me about him and you but his name is bob really remember a lot about him what's really happening is you're excited he got the chance to talk about yourself and you're excited that they were genuinely interested this should not be a physic fishing expedition where you're just going for information and not actually caring it really needs to be something you can engage with so let's say someone's really interested about something we talked earlier about auto repair shops ok, I am in some ways you know true confessions not the stereotypical male I have no interest in working on my car none none my little brother tommy who you guys met in the slide show yesterday is brilliant when it comes to mechanics brilliant does all kinds of great things and he's like how do you not know how to change your oil like because the guy at the shop knows how it's not something I'm going to spend time dealing for me to get into a conversation with my little brother tom about an engine is a conversation that he's going to really like I'm not going to be that into it, so if your customer, your audience members talking about something that you're not really that into, you have to really focus it's easy to zone out it's easy to feign interest or pretend and they're going to pick up on that in a heartbeat and the problem is going to be there sharing something they're really passionate about an emotional about, and if they don't feel like you're picking up on their vibe or picking up what they're laying down, they're going to leave for the negative experience of that conversation we're going to be like, gosh, I was really telling him all about what my interest are, and I think there was nothing there yesterday we did a little joey and five minutes exercise, okay, some of you that we're online watched obviously those that were in the studio audience had the chance to see it, and that was about twenty four hours ago. I gave you a background on my bio in less than five minutes, so we've now been together for about seven and a half leaning into eight hours and the total amount of time spent on that was less than five minutes, but let's see how much he retained okay now I offered it up and your customers are gonna offer it up as easily as I did okay but let's just see how much he retained so if some of the folks who run the room grab a mike and some of the people that were online go ahead and jump in the chat room and share something that you remember from the presentation well go ahead john you remember brought up in a little town in the middle of nowhere and I where you where your dad was an attorney you wanted to become an attorney you were one of seven you had you went to notre dame you were in the glee club you were irish catholic and you associating with people like kennedy and that's what I'll start with night yes thank you what else who remember stuff you travel a lot you've been to many places I travel a lot been to many places true or you had them like you covered that quite nicely nice john stole all of megan's things I know the cia worked for the cia logo actually were linked in somehow with not president bush but president clinton so stated more with president clinton's isn't about distinction you wanted to make so what's fascinating is if I may interrupt and I'm not making a comment at all on megan's politics but did you see the language? She is right there that's a distinction that you wanted to make we might be able to make an assumption about what megan's political beliefs are okay, we might not she might have just been being polite or not wanting to say are you a democrat? It kind of seems like you're a democrat you had a picture of kennedy in your slide deck you had a picture of clinton your slide deck you're irish catholic you seem a little liberal and the shoes you wear I'm guessing you might vote democrat but she didn't want that should polite but it could also mean yeah, you're on the wrong side of this story that's the fascinating thing about getting information about your audience you may get a piece of information that you have some emotional judgments about you get to decide whether that works for your business or not I have clients that are democrats have quite instead of republicans I have clients that are independent for me it's cool but there are other people that say no no, no I will not work with anyone who's political views don't align with mine I will not work with anyone who's religious views don't align with mine do we have a couple people with different stuff on the chat room? Funky guy says he worked as a programmer joey traveled the forty four countries from aaron yeah that you worked for bill clinton moved back to dc and front of design symphony uh wife, first of all, three eighteen media thought it was wife beth and son lachlan. Then I think it was buried. Unusual name. It probably was very nice. I like it. So my wife has a very unusual name and that's. One of things I really appreciate. The who is that? On the chat room restaurant, it was three. Eighteen media. And who else? Enough. We're going to boston. So nothing. Three, eighteen media. I love it because one of the fascinating things is when it comes to people's personal connections, their spouse, their children. If you're going to use the name, you got to get it right. It is better to not use the name. It is better to say how's your wife. Then you say how's your wife, beth, when my wife's name is barret because you might walk yourself into a really interesting conversation like I observed once at a networking about where somebody said, how is your wife? Sue? And there was a woman standing next to him and the woman said soo's, not his wife anymore. I am. You want to be careful about the customer information you get. What I would encourage you to do is not overlook the small clues, okay, anyone that knows me knows I put the fanatic in fan when it comes to notre dame specially notre dame football I'm not as I mentioned there are a couple areas where I'm not the stereotypical guy I'm not the stereotypical guy in the sense I'm not into cars and working on cars your mechanic stuff I'm not the stereotypical guy in the sense that I'm not a big sports fan except for notre dame football people ask me oh joey who's your favorite pro football team I root for the team has the most players that went to the university of notre dame true story I don't have a favorite protein pro basketball, tennis, golf, hockey you name it not my thing I'll go when all you know I like a good experience but I'm not into it this gets my attention you want to talk in notre dame football I'm all about it now what's interesting about notre dame football is there two types of people in the world? They're the people that love notre dame and they're the people that haven't come to their senses yet okay, so this is an emotionally charged one I've given presentations in southern california where people have started booing in the crowd because they went to the university of spoiled children excuse me the university of southern california you want to be careful with the information you give with the information you get because while this is certainly a personal connection I went there and it is an emotional connection I am a rabid fan the next question you have to ask is it's personal and it's emotional, but is it positive or negative because it could be both rest enough points out it's actually odd nobody brought up notre dame because you did mention that more than anything you talked about, somebody did john started it out way we may miss her john brought it up in the very first thing that I said and you're right because I did mention this more than most anything else I mean, I think the only thing got more air time in the last day and a half the notre dame has been my son lachlan okay, which we're going to come to that one all right? He was wearing notre dame gear, you are correct, we're anticipating where the conversation is going. One of the other things that got brought up is that I like to travel and in fact, somebody in the chat room even said forty four countries the absolutely right mean remembers with that level of specificity, I think it's important again, this is not a big ego stroke for hey, how much do you know about joey? What it's saying is, when someone presents information to you, if you're listening, you can feed that information back to them and they're like they care about me they like me I mean make no mistake about it me throwing out that question what do you guys remember? I'm hoping you remember something now I know enough about psychology and how the brain works that for everything I told you about me I anchored it with a visual so I got all the visual learners I got all the auditory learners because I said what it wass oh, and by the way I kind of even picked up the kinesthetic learners because slides were moving very quickly so the kinesthetic learners were like oh he's keeping pace I like it that is by design that was not a mistake okay, so I knew you were going to remember certain things about me the more you home these skills, the more you listen, the more you practice you'll be able to pick up on these things and little conversations on when you can feed them back you will blow your customers minds they will wonder when did I ever tell him that? How does how does he know that? I don't think I ever mentioned to her what my kids names were and she just asked about them how how cool is that now it's a fine line that might go how creepy is that? But you know what? Let me give you permission I would rather have you be a little creepy than what you're doing right now which is not giving a damn I would rather have your customers go how did they figure that out about me then? What is happening right now where they're like I really am customer number three, two, eight, seven four to them change the conversation is this a connection? That's personal? Absolutely forty four countries and counting if you dive into the conversation with me, you know that I have a goal to have always been toe a minimum of one more country than I am old, so I have to go to a new country every year now ironically enough, we're going to come to the conversation about my son because my son was born this year I didn't go to a new country, I traveled internationally, but I went to places I've already been and I don't say this again from a place of ego but forty four countries to get new ones requires work it's a commitment but is a commitment I'm willing to make. You know we had a guy on a creative live a few ah week ago we can have go chris gila but he's a good friend of mine and chris has been to every country in the world when chris and I get together, do you think we have things to talk about? Hell to the yeah, we have a great conversation john and I were having dinner when there was a group of us having dinner last night, and john shared that he was born in south africa, and then he lived in sierra leone, and it turned into this, you know, long, wonderful, fabulous story of the travels that this fascinating man has had in his life, and I think I'm fair to say that I wasn't the only person that dinner table we were captivated, we would have sat therefor days listening to john tell stories, and if we were to ask the people who were at that dinner today, some twelve to fifteen hours later, tell me some of the cool things that john is done, they could rattle him off with unbelievable factual accuracy on what's fastening is if we put the camera on john's face, he enjoyed telling the stories not because he wanted that let's be clear, it's not because he wanted to brag chance not a bragging, boastful guy, but he's led a fascinating life, and he enjoyed sharing the story. I think it's one of the reasons we connect because, well, it seems that we both have a similar approach to life in the sense that is there an opportunity to get a good story out of this if there is, I'm all in that's a fun way to live life. It's a really fun way to live life and the fact of the matter is it allows us to connect in a way that I can't connect with people and I presume john can't connect with people who don't live their lives that way I mean he'll work at it because he's a he's a very connecting relationship based guy and so will I but it's a lot harder to connect with someone who's like no was born in this town uh grew up in this town never left this town going on in this town my kids will be born in this town my kids who grew up in this town my kids will die in this town that's fine, I don't let me be really, really clear especially is a guy who grew up in a little town in iowa there was a wonderful place to grow up I don't judge that I'm not saying that's wrong I'm just saying I have a different life philosophy and it's easier for me to connect as it is for all of us with people who have a life philosophy that is similar to ours than a life philosophy that is different than ours and the way this really applies to your business or taking out of the personal life contest your business life your business will be more successful if you're drawing in the audience members who have a similar life philosophy is you a similar ethic a similar belief system now I'm not saying silo yourself off and only watch fox news or only watch cnn or only read the economist because that's just is dangerous toe only associate with the people who think like you and believe what you believe they've done amazing studies it warps your brain it will make you look the trustee to study came out the news yesterday yesterday or the day before we're going to talk tomorrow about the importance of staying on top of things and being well read and getting new data into the input right filling the mechanism with new ideas and fresh perspectives but they did this study where they said if you watch on ly fox news or if you watch on lee cnn or something like that if you're kind of one of these siloed folks they can show you ah factually true graph like for example, one of the things and this is not a political statement although you've already picked up on the fact that I skew more liberal than not but they showed a graph of the economy since president obama took office and it's a general premise the graph goes up the economy has improved okay factually this isn't joey's commentary on democratic politics if you look at the level of unemployment in this country has gone down per capita incomes have gone up facts that we can look at numbers on a chart now some of you what's fascinating some of the people in the room, some of the people online are already saying, joey, for the first time in this day and a half, you're actually lying because of your world on what they'll do is they'll show this chart and the chart shows things going up and they will ask people, did things improve or not? And there was no, they got worse. They are looking at a chart that shows the line going up that's, the way the brain works, this is what you're up against. What are the conversations you're having with people? How are you tracking their interests? So, yeah, absolutely, I will love to have a conversation about traveling the world, interesting experiences I've had countries I've been to, I'm not at all surprised that that came up is one of the ideas here's the one that of course, was gonna come up right? My son lachlan, anyone let me rephrase this. I am yet to meet a person who has a child under six months. It isn't really excited about their child, right? I've become that dad, I've become the dad that has I prior to this, my cellphone, maybe had a dozen photos on it prior to my son being born now there are about two dozen photos per day of him it's so much fun it's great for those of you that have kids you know what I'm talking about for those of you that don't have kids you may have experienced this hanging out with friends with kids or knee surgeon office I'm not saying you have to have children what I am saying is if you have children that's an opportunity to connect some of the more recent conversations I've been having with parents or like so how's it going it's a chance of honor I get much sleep how's he doing is he colicky he learned anything you know we learned how to roll over last week that was a big exciting moment there's an opportunity to connect in a really interesting way if somebody wants to talk to me about my son her about notre dame or both he's watched every notre dame football game my wife is a big fan of no screen time you're not supposed to let children watch tv right because of the screen cuts it's too fast it's not good for them so lachlan and I sit really far away from the tv during the notre dame again okay we're really far back but we just let him let him kind of get into the zone get into the feeling and a little bit all right so these are some of the things and by the way these slides were in the deck before I even asked the question right? I asked you what do you remember about me and three of the top things that came up I knew you were going to remember because it's a personal and emotional connection how do we actually do this in our business right because we're not going to necessarily get our customers to come in and say let me tell you all about myself in five minutes or less with a slide show they're not going to do that the first way is to observe ok I was telling you guys about we're talking about cars right so this is the back of the suv we have before there's a judgment on the fact that I own an suv we live in the mountains at eight thousand feet I need four wheel drive okay I used to live in washington d c the people who had land rovers and dodge durangos in washington dc where rarely if ever snow's seriously like watching four wheel drive in a snowstorm in d c was hysterical because no one knew how to do it right people would have hummers in d c I'm like really really you need to climb up the washington monument what are you doing with that vehicle? Okay, so this is my vehicle now imagine I go to an auto repair shop have my oil changed and this car pulls in what do you think they might be able to observe about its owner? Oh my goodness that I am a notre dame fan that I bought the twenty dollar little chrome stick on and convinced my wife to let me plaster the back of our car with the notre dame sick on so that when I am driving down the road people know that's an irish fan no one and I love the place I take my car to get worked on no one has ever noticed that and taken action on it and it's right in front of him imagine what would've happened if I got my oil changed this week when I got back in my car as a gift as a present as something free this was in my car go irish beat maybe here's to a big win this weekend seth the mechanic who worked on your car would I ever get my car worked on anywhere? Health no now some of you may say, well, joey that's great. If seth is a notre dame fan, what if set is a navy fan? Well, then south shouldn't write the note right? Because we want to be authentic don't try to connect in a way with your customers that is misaligned with who you are, what your beliefs are, what your company stands for, you will fall on your face face it will be a train wreck, russ I would argue though, that they could very much like start eh a smack talk with you yes and it has the same effect even though they're disagreeing absolutely it shows the absolutely the same note could say jelly see the urine irish fan it's a shame they're going to get whupped by navy this weekend go midship okay and as a fan I'd be okay with that I'd see it is like playful banter because in the world especially in the world of college football that banter with the fans is excessive acceptable now if we were in the world of how shall we say south american football soccer and you were a rival team like you could get stabbed for leaving a note like that car seriously I mean they are talking I mean, to talk about notre dame fans being insane like some of the you know, football soccer fans are chest off the charts insane so you want to be careful with him but russia totally right, especially in the united states of a college football you could absolutely start some banter and I'd still even like it if he did the banter, I'd still go to that shop because I'd be like oh, because guess what? I'm going to pay really close attention to whether we win or lose and if we win next time I take my car and I'm telling seth about it hey seth no sorry navy didn't win again this year what's that me I I think you guys have lost would it be forty eight of the last fifty times? We've met that's okay? You'll get one someday and if we lost I'd have the chance to go in with two things one could could happen I could come in and seth could be like sorry about the tough loss you guys put up a good game or I could come in and say, well, you know you got that one you're not getting the next one and it's a connection it's a conversation right? And this is just too funny I have to read it, polly mathis says yeah, the car mechanic if their navy fan could also when they're doing their assessment, point out the notre dame sticky thing as a problem with the vehicle and offered to fix it that is brilliant. We noticed a major safety defect on the back of your car it appears to be a giant beacon that is going to force people to try to run into your car, hit it with a baseball bat or forced you off the road for free as a bonus, we will remove this defect at no cost it's under factory warranty, we could have fun with it right on what I love thank you so much for sharing that what I love about that this is what we're talking about, we're talking about having fun with our businesses we're talking about connecting in ways that we haven't been connecting in that we could actually enjoy.