Best Practices for Family Support
So let's move on, Teoh. What? I've been promising this whole class of China is really important to you. Guys were expanding on the answer to the dreaded question and we're gonna learn how to deal with skeptical loved ones who are scared of you leaving a sure thing for something so risky. So how do we get our family support? Right? It is possible to get your family support. It is possible to change their minds, right? And it's easier when you have their support. You could still obviously launch a successful business without their support. But when you have it, it's much better experience, right? So let's give them the what along with the Y. You'd be surprised, right? I think sometimes we assume that our families know why we're doing what we're doing, but they don't eso tell them what it is you're passionate about. Tell them what about this? Business is a good fit for you. Tell them what you're going to make work about this what you want to dio and knowledge that you know this is the har...
d road, right? Why are you doing this? Why are you voluntarily doing something so difficult? Why is it important to you? We want to express all of this to them in a very direct way. Don't forget the how. Don't give your reasoning without a plan. You're here because you're crafting a plan. Don't keep the plan to yourself, because that's really gonna show them that this isn't a whimsical decision that you've made right. Show them your safety net action plan, which will have by the end of the day today tell them about your Plan B that we worked on yesterday to be able to tell them if this doesn't work, this is the plan I'm putting into action. Show them it's not a win a win. And the side effect of that is, if you share this with them, they'll probably be able to help keep you accountable. And they'll probably give you an easier time when you ask for the time in the space that you need to do this work right. So, you know, maybe your kids, like aren't so great at leaving him alone when it's time to do business stuff, but by explaining to them what the business is and why it's important to you and why you need their help, right? Like, build that team. And, you know, I would think the kids would be excited to know it's Mommy's business time. Like when the door is closed. Let's leave her alone, hopefully for a while, and she'll be out in half an hour. And we could, you know, play with her then, right? Like, bring them on board. Listen, reflects and compromise. Don't make this a one way conversation, please. This isn't about telling your family, you know, the what? The why the how and then say, Well, that's the plan. Everyone. Thank you very much, right? Talk with them. Don't talk at them. And you know, this is all like coach speak. But if you try to get to the why behind their reasoning, then that that's really where the magic is, that's where you're gonna come up with mutually beneficial agreements. That's where you're gonna be able to create a team. So if they come to you and say, Well, I see your breathe easy number is $5000 but minus 10 and I don't want you to leave your job before we have $10,000 saved if you respond with like but that's gonna take me another three years. I'm going to kill myself and you're the worst and I hate you. And then you have a big fight. That's doesn't help. Instead, uh, this is a coaching tool. Reflect to them what you've heard, even when it seems obvious to me like, just want to make sure I'm clear you want. You want this number to be double in order for it's for you to be comfortable and confident with this transition. Why is that? Why? Where'd you get that number? Front and ask it from a place of curiosity, not judgment. And just try to build the conversation from there. Continue to share your winds, your losses, your results and your opportunities even if you crash and burn. Even if you go to the farmers market and you spend $200 on your booth and the products that you make and you make 20 bucks, tell them about it. Uh, share the good things. Share the bad thing. Shared the short term goals, share the long term goals. Let them in, let them in. This is even if you crash and burn. This is the best way for your family to see that you are serious about what you're working on and you're getting something tangible out of it. Even if it doesn't work out. And when it doesn't work out And I speak from experience, you're able to say to them, Hey, remember that launch that I worked on that I thought we were going to make, like, a lot of money while we made very little money and this is what I think went wrong, And this is what I'm gonna do about it. So coming to them with with, um, a more proactive peace as to how you're going to change things or fix things, ask for their help. Do you see why I only sold $20 at the farmer's market? I can't figure it out. Bring them in there along for the marathon. We talked yesterday that this the entire process is not a sprint. It's a marathon. Your family is along for the long distance run. And just remember that they want to keep you safe and that they love you. And this is why they're skeptical and an unsupportive because they're afraid that you're going to get hurt. And, uh, if you remember that at the out at the outset, the whole conversation, I think, could be a lot less combative. Uh, as long as this wouldn't be a procrastinate Torrey Tool, I would highly recommend that you put together a power point presentation for your family with all of these points, right, Call a meeting of your board of directors because that's who they are. They're the ones investing in you. Even if they're not giving you money, they're giving your time. Giving your support. Make your case as to why you need their support with everything that's here, right? Tell them you're what Tell me or why. Telling your house. Show them your snap. Show them your plan. Be given the reasoning behind things. Asked them for questions. This this actually I think, would be a great tool as a business owner because having this power point is almost like a business plan for you, right? It's putting everything out there. So if you have the time and you feel like it would be a good tool and I want, you know, have you procrastinate too much, that could be a really great way to get your family on board. so I want everyone to take action right now, regardless of whether you feel supported. You need to have a conversation with your family about everything that you've been working on here. So I want you to look at the calendar right now. I want you to, um, pick a time and either send your family an email invite and say, like pictured a job talk. It's happening on Tuesday at 7 p.m. Everybody like send it to them or send them an email text message saying We need to talk about diction. My day job link. We do that where we have a good chunk of time. Mm. So this is all scary stuff. This is all scary stuff. And I know this was a big topic in the chat room yesterday, so I'd love to still hear any fears or concerns or questions around getting your family on board and on the same page as you. So we'd love you to answer that in the chat will go to Canada in a moment. But if there's anything that comes up for you guys that you're still concerned about or want to talk about in terms of family support. Let me know anything? No, that's good. Yes. Live. Thank you. Laying all these points out because this is actually giving me a, um, something tangible today with my husband That it, um that I think I really need. And I I feel insecure about what I'm doing. Yes, I feel really insecure about what I'm doing. And I always feel like I'm always kind of apologetic for a while. He's spending time on that. I know there's a lot of other stuff that needs to get done, but having a plan and being able to present them to him can show them house. Show him how serious I am. Good. I'm so glad to hear that. Thank you. And I don't think you have to hide that insecurity. You know what I mean? Like, show them that you're in control because you are. Now, with the work that you're doing here, you're in control and you have a plan where you didn't you tell me where you didn't two days ago. And now you dio but don't feel like you have to put the mask on that. You figured everything out. I think that that's very detrimental. So so allowing yourself to be vulnerable with your family and say Okay, I started figuring this out of started putting the plan together. What do you think? What do you need? We're in this together. What you know, and and make it a continued discussion, right? Feel free. I think this is another great tactic to have. Not only do you have the conversation now on the calendar, but maybe you have, like, a monthly board of directors meeting, right? My husband and I have finance meetings that we try to have once a week, but it's more like once or twice a month. But we talk about at the end of every month, the money that we both brought into our businesses and what we spent and what needs to change. And, um, we just, you know, we put aside an hour on a Sunday night at the very end of the month and talk through those things, so make it, you know, make it a re occurring, put it on the calendar every month every other week and have a business meeting together. Great. Any questions coming through in the chat? Any concerns or fears that people are having that needs to be talked about real quick. Yeah, I mean, we have a lot of people that are sharing what they're going through a swell or what they have gone through. Um, Tiger, Kelly says. I just went through this with my dad and sister. I had more time to talk and explain why House and and wise of what I'm working on and not getting defensive about it. They do care, and it's a new concept for them, but they really want what is best for you. So congratulations on doing that. We have T. Hawk, who says My wife has always been supportive, and I'm very lucky in that way. My daughter is on and off. I'm just not sure she understands what it's all about and that I can make money, uh, doing it. Um, and I have a client I would interview there. I have a client that we were talking through the same thing. And she said that her kids always know that, like her job brings in the fund money on. So she was worried that if they saw that she was leaving her job that they automatically I would think I'm not gonna be able to take my gymnastics classes. I'm not gonna be able to go to camp like we're not gonna be able to go to the movies. And so, uh, by making that connection as to what she she thinks is our her Children's fears, especially when you have young kids, it's hard to have, obviously, you know, a real conversation about this, but she knows what she needs to specifically tell them about what might change temporarily. Um, but ultimately, you know what she's working towards and that they won't have toe not do any extracurricular activities anymore because Mommy doesn't want to stay in her job. So that's that's really big. That's really big. We'll talk about really big, huh? Um, it looks like Angie in the chat rooms has already talked with her husband, Um, and who says My hope? She says. My husband already noticed a huge change in my happiness levels after yesterday's class. Hey, yeah, and you know, and I had this in my head to talk about, and then I forgot, and then you you reminded me you might have to spell out your family what your day job is doing to you physically and emotionally, right? If you notice that you just talked to a client about this, she said. Michelle, I have nightmares nightly, I've nightly nightmares. I have migraines on and off. I have stomach aches, the stress levels and the physical things that are happening to her, she said. You know, she thinks her husband notices them, but by having this talk and saying this is what's been happening to me emotionally and physically and spelling it out for them, it might feel maybe a little overdramatic. But it's not. You need to. You need to tell them what is going on with you because even just for health reasons, like does your husband know about nightly nightmares and migraines and stomach aches and anxiety and feeling, stress and pressure all the time that it's you have to spell it out. So I'm so I'm so glad that that yesterday's class helped, and to see the mood right, that's a good way to describe it to the kids like Mommy is gonna be a lot happier. A be a lot happier. Give this gift to Mommy now and the gift will come back. Teoh Really good way to do it