Communicating Without Words
so you don't always have to be big to a connect and be impactful and maybe even have a lot of an attention because what the actor knows is that they have an intention. So if Amy and I are playing a scene together, I have goals, I have objectives, there are things I want to accomplish and she may or may not want me to accomplish them and often the conflict arises because she doesn't. So you know if we were brother and sister and our father passed away and left all his money to Amy, I might feel a little left out and maybe I want some of that money so I might you know try to get her to give me that money by being really nice about and say look you know obviously that always liked you better, but I really wasn't that bad of Sun and I know I stole his car and crashed you know all these things but still and she says no, well now I get mad because I didn't achieve my objective and I said yeah I think that's absolute C R A P and blah blah blah blah blah blah. And I started out making her feel...
bad because who do you think you are etcetera, etcetera. Maybe it doesn't work on her. The stakes keep getting raised. Now I'm crying down on my knees begging because my intention is to get this money, I'm trying to get this money, that's my objective is my goal. Now in a dramatic art, the writer creates conflict so you usually don't get what you want. But as a performer on the stage when you're giving speeches or presentations, you are more often than not getting what you want, but sometimes you're not. So you need to try a different tactic, but you still have the intention. My intention is to get Michael, Michael, Michael to feel a certain way and I don't feel it's happening or I want him to think something and it's not working. We're not trying to try a different intention. I need to try something else to make that happen. But if I know what my intention is at all times in this game, my intention is to get you to give me that spot. And he gave it to me quickly. Well now, I know what my intention is and I will use whatever I have to make that happen. And if I do things that get in the way of that, because I think it's funny or if I, you know, want to get some attention. Well, it actually takes away from my intention. You with me say yes, if you are all right. One other thing to consider is how you use your body. So what do you see in the body language in the game? What do you see people do with their arms office? Yeah. She adjusted her arms. You see any particular patterns if you have a mic on, let me know if you see any particular patterns in the games. Yeah, hands folded. So often we have our hands folded here. Are you familiar with that? You've seen people do this, It is very protective. You're protecting your family jewels. I understand the need for that. But it is closed off. If you find yourself doing this, everyone's well, it's not a big deal. It's not you're a bad speaker or something. You just notice it. Let me make it change. Um Elizabeth. This was were in the military. No, you just said don't use your hands and I know, but you did this for most of the most of the games. Elizabeth stood like this with your feet together. Very it's good and then she would do this and then she would put them back and then she would come back here and she'll be over here just fine. Now she switched to hear thinking oh this is bad, I should change, but I need to do something with my hands so she put them here. But you know, I saw that even without looking at her because you need to be able to take in the whole space when you're presenting. So now she moved to hear nothing wrong with it. It's fine. Now she's like I don't know what to do. So I'm going like this now because I keep putting on the spot. It's only getting worse. And all of a sudden now her hands start to feel like they're this out of her body and they have a life of their own and she doesn't know what to do with them.