Abstract To Specific Goals
It's an important part of achieving goals that you that you take a realistic stance on what's possible and that you don't know which is not to say that you may not. You may exceed your goal, right? But if you're realistic about it, then at least you don't give up and think that this is impossible. Okay, now it's enough for me to say this stuff, but I want you guys to actually think this through a little bit. So if you go to our page nine of your worksheet, there's a thing that's his abstract in specific gold. So what I want you to do is to take your abstract goal, okay? And then after that, what you're going to do is to, ah is to find some of the reasons why you're going to fail. Okay, so you make use of those Resource is to talk yourself out of things and figure out at least three reasons why why this plan of yours is not going to succeed, and then on. And then I want you to come up with a tely least five specific goals that will be actions that you can take that would make reference ...
to particular times of day days of the week that will help you to align the specific actions you're going to take with this abstract goal. There's a lot of research right now on what's called self compassion, which is interesting. So for a long time, starting in the seventies, we were really particularly us. We're really into self esteem. Self esteem is I got to feel good about myself. And so you know, the self esteem movement led to things like giving kids lots of trophies for participation and stuff like that, because that would make them feel good. And of course, kids air smarter than that. If everyone gets a trophy, then nobody got a trophy, right? And so, um, and it turns out that actually feeling just feeling good about yourself only gets you so far. In fact, it doesn't. It doesn't necessarily help you to change your behavior, but one of the things that does help you to change your behavior is what's called self compassion and self compassion is the willingness to accept failure in your life the way I like to talk about this, and I go to businesses and talk about this all the time is that businesses and people in general need to learn to distinguish between negligence and failure. Negligence is a punishable. Offence and failures is a learning experience. It's part of life that's a learning experience. Negligence is when you just don't put in the effort at work or in or in your attempts it behavior change if you envision the future and then create a specific plan to get you there, that you will be much more likely to succeed than if you don't do that. Now there are two parts that the first is essentially fantasizing about the future. When you fantasize about the future, what you want to dio is to figure out how the future that you desire is going to be different from the present that you have right now. You want to figure out what that difference is so that you understand what has to change in order to get from here to there and then you want to create these specific implementation intentions that are the kinds of things that you started to right now, right? Particular actions you can take on particular days, right? I always like to say Remember that tomorrow never comes when somebody says I'm going to do this tomorrow, okay? It's never tomorrow. It's always today. And so at some point in your plan, there have to be actions you take today that will engage you towards the big picture goal. So again, think back to this image we had at the beginning of our last section of I give you a transcript of what your day looks like every day. Okay, And you code that transcript You. You You look at each event that you did and you ask yourself, How does this contribute towards the big picture? Things that I'd like to accomplish? What we want to do is tow ADM or things into your day that move you towards the things that you'd like to accomplish and to remove things that will not get you towards the things that you're trying to accomplish.