The Bigger Picture: Why We Do What We Do Part 1
So, yeah, here we are. Hello, everybody. I'm gonna hello, guys. Good, good to see all good to be here. My name is jeremy. I'm going to assume everybody knows nothing about me. So I kind of start from the beginning, but I am from nashville, tennessee, where I currently live. Uh, spent a year in l a love their late, but I'm glad to be back in the south, but I wanted to talk a little bit about, um, you know, basically storytelling and tell you some actual stories from the field from my actual work, you know, a lot of times with photography and conferences and all this stuff we get so caught up in the gear and the cameras and f stops and shutter speeds and lighting and the list is a mile long and and I don't know about y'all, but it it's easy to walk into these conferences and feel like you have to have all the stuff, right? You have to have that latest cannon that they just released her, that lady, that latest pro photo like, you know, whatever, whatever, maybe for you that you always fee...
l like you have to have more, but at the end of the day, it's it's not about that at all in a lot of you're watching, you may not have any gear you may just have a phone he majors have basic dslr cheap camera and you know the end of the day it's about what you see in your vision and how you use that camera tio to express yourself tio express your voice and that's what I love the things that really left to talk about I'm going to do teach the lighting and all that stuff, but I really love to talk about the heart of why we do what we do, which is what today's class is about and I'm very excited there there's lots of stories uh that I'm going to share today summer extremely heartbreaking so uh if you're at home, you might want to grab some tissues just being honest, I will probably cry a little bit maybe a lot I'm known to crowd during tugs it was really frustrating because I don't have like a cool cry have like the ugly awkward cry where a snort and weird things happen um but my goal is to not do that today, so my goal is to make it through and be able to tell these stories. Um, so I'm going to get into to a little bit of my background, so I'm like I said I'm from nashville and everybody always asked me, how do I get started? How do you how do you start shooting celebrity is how does that work? Um I should say photographing still every shooting is always such a bed, especially these days but that's just our work for what we do right? So from nashville I went to college at a school called in tissue study graphic design actually in high school I was uh just love our I just loved to draw on a lift to paint and I was obsessed with anything creative failed miserably hit all things academics you know, and actually grew up telling my dad and my mom that like I can't I can't do anything like a suck it, you know, baseball, I can't hit the ball I was never get a piano never never could focus in class you know, I I was I think I took one class of photography in college omitted de eso nearly failed my one semester of photography, but but growing up I just because I couldn't focus and I wasn't I couldn't listen, I just acquitted as I'm stoop, but I'm done I'm never going to amount to anything so my life stories really interesting in terms of not thinking I was capable of much from my parents would always tell me I grew up in a christian home so my parents always tell me this verse philippians four thirteen you can do all things through christ who strengthens me and so my dad would say that over and over and over family has started to believe it but I went through college still still not knowing you know what I was going to do didn't do well in photography but when I had graduated my appearance told me about photoshopping computers so I jumped in the photo shop and actually to my surprise really fell in love with creating and I was like, ok, I've actually guests the thing that I enjoy and and so worked for ah couple design ages design firms at a school I got fired from the first time not only did I get fired, but I was told to find leave creativity altogether like go be a youth minister good do anything else but you probably shouldn't be a designer so that was a good time but thankfully I didn't listen because I learned that I could do anything I want to do right? So I went and worked at a couple more ad agencies and when digital photography started coming about really two thousand one starting to sound old the first digital camera but was a cannon rebels like a three megapixel which is ridiculous that there is that small but but about that cameron has started shooting textures and just anything and everything concrete and and I would incorporate those those textures into my design work and then, you know, living a national all my friends are musicians and everybody's creative started designing album covers and shooting my friends who are musicians and they would get sign to record levels and the record labels would notice me and they'd say, hey, we want you to design and shoot this other project and so that just kind of picked up very organically. Um, and then I actually beat a, uh, some some hollywood photographers for job. There was a national, and I wanted the job. So I got over these guys, but they had an agent in hollywood, so she calls me and she's like, hey, you just beat me and you landed this gig, and I love your work. I love to work with him, so we signed a deal, uh, it's basically like a musician. Sunny record deal. So I got a deal with an agent, and shortly after that, you know, she was had me out in hollywood meeting with all these, you know, tv networks and record labels, and it was kind of ah zero to sixty. Now I can appreciate it because I know how hard it is to get those gigs toe land, that kind of work. But in the beginning, like us is so easy, I just decided I want to do photography and I end up in hollywood. No, no, no problem, um so in a way, that was two thousand five that we that I decided I wanted to be a photographer so it's been nine years and you know in that first year gets things start going through my portfolio portfolio uh so that the first year was you know, I get to shoot a gun and taylor um and just a big mix of celebrities and by the way, there's a lot of celebrity work I can't show due to rights and all that gets stuff it's hard toe get permission from every shoot of ever done and show a live online so if you want to see all of my celebrity work in my portfolio, you can go to my website german coward dot com so just giving you a heads up that I can't show all of it but these air some other other images this is this shoot actually just did my first shoot for nike a few weeks ago and this is the gymnast shawn johnson that I did um the next image this is probably the image of most known for and this is ah the artist imogen heap she's just probably my favorite person I've ever worked with she's just insanely creative and beautiful and uh and just a blast to work with but I shot image in that first year this is a shoot for entertainment weekly uh mr blake shelton is dolling kris kristofferson but because I can't show all the celebrity there's tons more I've shot the kardashians ryan seacrest maggie gyllenhaal gosh the list goes on carrie underwood I mean all the country stars britney spears yes I toured with britney spears for three months how somehow slipped my mind no she said that that was a crazy two hours you can imagine uh yes I was britney spears to our photographer for three months around the world um alyssa did ah a three month tour with an organization called passion and we went to seventeen countries in three months and I was just hard to shoot the concerts the portrait of the people in the cities we go to the tallest building in every city and she you know, shoot from the rooftops and so I have a very diverse experience and photography because I've been on tours and I've shot weddings and I've shot celebrities and it's just too really random greg grab bag of types of sheets have done but my favorite type of work to do is when I'm like when I'm in my element actually my first creative life class was talking about experimental photography and just doing crazy stuff right? And so just two days ago the shoot isn't even forty eight hours old I did a show in my studio with a new new musician and these are some of the results this this image is actually straight out of camera um all I did was bump up the contrast but I'm really proud of the shoot and there are a lot of shoes to be honest that I'm not proud of problem the majority I mean a lot of times we kind of dial in our shoots we like to say that we're giving one hundred percent to every single photo shoot but that's not always the case but this is actually shoot I did two days ago that I actually feel like I actually gave one hundred percent to this to the shoot but here's some more images um I love the eleven the blurry more finite fine fine art type of work love brooke shade in big fan of her work chooses to yesterday um this's may just kind of goofing off she brought this crazy silver metallic fabric that we played with um played with projectors and laser pins and fog machines and iphones and um yeah like this this is basin maybe a kid in a candy store like I love love doing this type of work trying scoop back so you'll consume um but again if ugo on my figure on the website you can see tons more I have way too many images on the web site published in there that now um but I want a rewind a little bit and talk about um photography the twenty four seven part of photography that hopefully we all do I am a tire fire around the clock like obviously I do really cool shoots with cool people on that that's a huge blessing to be able to do that but but I want him at home people assume that I'm like a jet setting photographer hanging out cool people but that's not the case that all the reality is I'm a dead and I I live a very normal life at home with my wife and kids I go to work at nine am I come home the thought being like like everybody else but I just travel some and get to do some coal chutes um so when I'm at home I I do what hopefully you guys I'm shooting my kids I'm trying to document life you know, because I'm passionate about about telling the story of my own family and so wanted tio to share some slides of my life and and what I do when I'm not you know, doing these crazy shoots um one things I like to talk about is I don't feel they ever thought about it but but if you're alive right now you are the beginning of your family tree and digitally speaking so if you think about like if you go unless your great grandfather your grandfather was super super famous if you google your grandfather grandmother, you're going to get zero results right? If you google your parents, you're probably going to get very few results unless they're on facebook but if you google me or google any of you or your friends basically if you're online right now and you're tweeting or facebooking or whatever you're leaving this crazy legacy, you know that one day our grandkids will be doing a college report on their grand parents and when they go your name there's going to be thousands of results right? From tweets to instagram post toe block post where we're leaving this trail of information about ourselves and that is so fascinating to me it's like we're the beginning of the rest that's our family tree like the cowards will be known as we were photographers you know, we started as loving creativity and photography and so I'm really fascinated by that idea and so loved that I'm document I'm telling the story about my kids and myself. So here are some family photos I have ah son and a daughter and this is when they're babies and and these two kids, I know every parent as proud of their children, right? But I'm proud of my kids because to this day they're now eight and six years old and they're just best friends like they don't fight they don't argue it's it's actually crazy I'm like don't tell when I just argue just to be like all the other kids you know, but they really are best friends and I just love how I've been able to tell the story of the relationship now for eight years so this is in their babies this photo is amazing because it kind of sums up that phase their life my friends got his uh his train he's got his race car shirt and he's rocking the bed head just amazing amazing set of hair here and then my daughters get her blankie her passive fire her chocolate milk and she's also rocking the bed head so that picture basically sums up the phase of their lives every morning they wake up when we let him watch cartoons together and all that good stuff this was ah brief period we lived in l a together right in there right in their jeep in the driveway that was a daily routine superman and the princess here holding his sister where is he so well does um yeah I mean every day I'm trying to do something toe document their relationship and it's cool because if you're a face of a person like I used but you know post all these on my personal facebook page and this fun tow to scroll through there from babies to now a years old it really is a cz much of so many of us kind of hate facebook there are some, you know, sweet uh sweet parts about it and I love scrolling through there and kind of seeing the the journey here's what here's our dog and cat who both just passed away in the last two months so and that's been hard for the kids but part of life um hard on me too. So this was you know when when we go out and this is a july fourth fireworks and take my little mere lis fuji film you know, I think it was six one hundred s love document them and low light one of my favorite ongoing siri's I'm doing with my kids is that we have a trampling in the backyard and I love to be able to to the tram plaints it's right up against a solid brown wall and so the light we live on a hill so the light hits this wall basically provide the seamless and my kids can jump on the trampoline and I have this blank background and, you know, left to talk about personal projects because those photographers more than anything else that's the number one most important thing to your journey you know so many photographers get discovered not by their amazing retouching of their amazing personal work but their actual just I'm tired, but by their personal projects I mean, I could tell you story after story of famous photographers who started with personal work there's a famous tarver who's named them name of spacing on her now, but he is a little brick corner with a reflect coming in, he documents all these celebrities in the same, uh, brick corner with all the slight beaming down it's, a really beautiful siri's, but I have multiple personal projects going right now, actually, one of them's on my instagram and I'm calling portrait key way and basically to do is a shoot one stranger, and they have to ask a question that could be any question in the world and the next person, that issue has to answer the question from the person before then they ask a question that the next person is the answer and the list goes on and on. So, um, I've been I've been doing this for just three weeks now I just shot twenty something homeless people last week on dh they continue this year because the goal for me is tio to capture all ages, all of life, you, young and old, successful, not successful, you know, or whatever success means, but anyway, that's, another personal project that have going some always carrying these little personal projects, is a way to keep myself really creatively inspired. You know, all that it's easy to in commercial work to get de motivated to get tired of it. A lot of times you have to follow the rules of the the art director do it do issue like a lot of times I'm dialing in beauty letting which I know how to do but it may not be the most exciting thing, but when I can pour my passion into my kids on the trampoline or the portrait q a project rave I haven't have a frosted door and mustard you and every person that comes through there I had them stand up against this frost the door and it creates is crazy haunting kind of silhouette so I'm always thinking in terms of how can I pour myself in a more personal projects but at home full circle here it's ah back to you know my kids on the trampoline so this is me laying under the trampling, shooting up my daughter's hair with the sun beaming through same thing with my son this is me holding an iphone with my right hand and a water hose with my left hand and spring my son with the water and just again against that brown wallet the trampling this is too beautiful just a beautiful silhouette type thing my daughter flying through the air yeah, I hope to continue this for a long time and have a nice long siri's of ah I love this one the sun beaming through my daughters here they there are my kids last year on the beach still hugging, always hugging but I have some some specific a few more specific stories about about my kids so uh I found it and I phone app called ok do this and so I would love for you all to check it out it's free in the itunes app store okay, do this all one word and the idea bondo could do this is to is to create an idea we call the ideas dues because we want you to get off the couch and go do something and it's super super fessing it's like it's like instagram on steroids basically because you can create an idea it's like a hash it's like a powerful hashtag you create the idea but it always stays under your name and so and okay do this stuff posted over three hundred ideas the others can go d'oh but one of the dudes that somebody posted was shoot a portrait through the bottom of the glass right? And so I'm like at home and I'm like how can I interpret that idea that do? And so my daughter was running out the door for school and she looks so beautiful on our little beanie and all that and I literally just grabbed a quick glass off my table held up my iphone and shot through the glass and this was the result straight out of camera you know and so I love the app because it forces you are promising to do things you would never do otherwise because a lot of times with social media, especially instagram and all of you know this instagram khun b tend to be all sunsets sylvie's you know, coffee cup is the same thing over and over and you know it, we're it's easy to fall into the same cracks or the same cliches and so the ok do this you're allowed to go through that we have a full on curated discover section where you can discover new users new ideas to d'oh you can ahh it's just an endless feat of creativity and things to do so but ok, do this prompted me to get this shot of my daughter and I'm super super thankful for that I love this this shot because this is my my son, my dad, my wife's step dad and my wife's dad and the three of the three of those men I mean it's very rare that they're all together, but they all drove with me when we moved to l a we moved across country together all three men, my son and my dog and we stayed in the poll one night and played ah played tag with some random other boys that were standing there hotel and it was just a blast and so it's like one quick iphone photo you know his chase famously said the best cameras the one that's in your pocket um but you know, I just happen to have my iphone and I grabbed this photo not thinking too much about it, but in hindsight I'm like, oh my gosh, what an amazing moment you know that moment of are the three dads basically together with my son that's a powerful photo for me to have? Um sometimes they come home from from work and my daughter just stuns me like stop something about tracks and this is one of those moments he gay moment she's wearing cowboy boots and slid off it and you know I'm always capturing portrait of those moments we went to the beach last year and I took a slew of poor ds and, uh, I love capturing all the poor kids you just can't beat that feel I mean even note no instagram filter any filter will ever touch the true magic of a polar. And so this is my son and this one is my favorite poet I've ever taken that was us too quick silhouette shot of my daughter we were on our way down to the to the beach and I had this little you know, think tank bag of all my pores stuff like I love your hair, living curls and stop, of course the kids with no dad, I want to go play and but thankfully she stopped for a minute and that grab this polar it's so I'm sure I will be known as the annoying dead like dad never but his camera down he was always taking your pictures but hopefully one day they'll be thankful that the dad was you know, capturing all these little moments so surprisingly my wife let me show this photo I still can't believe it gives my wife is the most modest humble person on the planet but that she was walking up from the beach on dh walking from the waves and I was sitting and I was shooting as they were walking but a lot of temple encourage photographers to shoot uncomfortably close you know get get in the picture and this is one of those moments where she was almost like to my face and I was still shooting and this is my favorite image it just feels like it feels like like nineteen forty all right just feel so classic and just her holding the board her very motherly attractive buddy um but I love my daughter you know looking back in the ocean holding or tube you're catching the waves crashing you know it's those moments that like that sums up that whole vacation you know and if you don't take the time to shoot those moments like you you'll regret it and so I always love being being the dead with the camera on the beach and you know, on vacation and all that good stuff the next photo is forever a priceless shot I didn't take the sweat of my friend amy did but this is to show it so this is my son knuckle deep into his nose with his finger picking his nose and he still has his friend aya holding his hand and admiring the crap out of them I mean if my son doesn't have game I don't know I like that a serious game right there I don't know any guy that can pick his nose like that and still still get the girl um but that is just a hilarious photo that I had to share the own um two weeks ago I was in alaska and uh I was on a cruise with my family and and it was the first time that my son I think fell in love with photography and it was the trip you know? We're all of a sudden he, like came to life is like, oh my gosh dad telling about this camera and uh so I started teaching about isis and shutter speeds and that stops him and it's so fine because that eight years old he already aiken say like so what's essay right now but uh sixteen hundred but you know that that would work you know, um and so is super fun for me to be teaching my kids how to take pictures I would I love the idea of him being a teenager and being able to photograph all his friends and, you know, do all that so it's actually quite funny in this photo he's holding a phase one body if any of you all know phase of what it's like the best camera in the world right now pretty much and so I was super nervous he had, like the the strap wrapped around his arm like five times a super expensive camera, but he was so funny that same homeless big thing and not able to balance with it, but it was awesome to see him shooting eighty megapixel images and alaska, so that was those pretty red. The next photo is probably my all time favorite photo of my kids, so it was the must son's first day of kindergarten and it was like slow motion my you know, I understand now while the parents weep and they're there taking their kids to school first day it's a really hard it's really hard thing because you've you have raised your children the way one you've you've set this perfect tone for their lives and you've taught them as much as you can and now you're freeing them into the world into their class, you know and it's a really hard thing to do, and so my wife and my daughter were all standing here watching my son and walk away the kind of garden it was so sad you know we'll like crying and really sad about it and that's where I was like a movie scene so he like really slow motion what it felt like he turns around for one last hug from his sister and and I had brought my dslr with me and I like slung it around and snapped one frame like super fast little that festive away wait click and he was you know you walked away um but it's just sometimes the magic of photography like I love this photo because I did unintentionally there's these two beautiful yellow lines coming through with a yellow on her on her crown I'm gonna wash is wearing a burger king crown that day but she was perfect the you know, the yellow on his batman back paige like it was just one of those moments that I can never recreate right and it's like man, I'm so glad I took that photo and you know, but that was like sister saying goodbye to brother the first day of kindergarten like such a powerful moment that could never recreate. And so who made it through that without crying saying I'm doing good um but uh so is made as much I love my two kids and I love documenting their journeys I'm super excited to tell you that we're in the process of adopting two more children uh from haiti we've been in the process for over two years now and it has been awful we dove right into a corruption and chaos and just the adoption process can be really hard but we're about to bring them home we think we think it will be before the end of this year we're still not sure yet um but their names are abby and david and here they are so this will be cool to tell them one day that you were alive in front of the whole world before you even came home but this we had their passports like it's all official you know this is debbie she's two years old and this is david he's three so we've been on a haiti a few times and get to be with him spend time with them so they know they're not actually brother and sister but they're the same orphanage and they know they're going to be brothers sisters so that's been a lot of fun um cma journey is about to begin with two more children on I'm super stoked toe have them home and tow to continue the journey so that is kind of that sums up kind of my family life and and what I like to do on a day to day basis like I said people think they see celebrities so they think I'm like this in fact one girl email me seriously and she's just like I assumed you were telling the humanitarian stuff just to, like, make up for the fact that you're actually like party do parting with celebrities all the time. I thought that was so funny as like, no, no, stay down when the kids and I think I've never been drunk in my life if that helps you in that, uh, that speculation, but yeah, I'm super simple, I live a very quiet, simple life. S o I'm going to completely change ah changed my path here and go back into the commercial world and talk about some stories that involve hustle involved, working really hard to create this path for yourself to create this journey. Like I said, people think that these things fall in my lap and that life is easy, and I live on this cloud where awesome things happen and it's, not the case at all. So a lot of times I hear when I hear people introduced me to talk about me, they'll say, oh, he shot staying and taylor swift and tim tebow and all the name off all these celebrities. But then in my mind, I'm laughing because I know each one of those stories and how they started, and so I'm going to share some of those with you. One of my favorite stories is a lot of times I'll use social media to find clients and so this girl you will not recognize her but if you've ever seen the show wipeout on abc it's the goofy show of people falling down the host is a girl named joe wagner and joanna uh my wife and I watch you're like, you know she she's really fun and we'll be friends with her if she were here she would be a friend you know, like you always said that when I'm watching tv themselves like oh that we're in l a at the time sounds like our sinner tweet there is to it happens that's tweeted hey jail, I'm a photographer would love that would love to work out with you check out my work and sammy cary dot com and sure enough like a couple hours later is like, hey, I love your work we should do a sheet together so few days later we're in l a doing a shoot together so you never know um and and I had to be a little cautious because I'm sure dudes hit up pretty girls all the way we should, you know? And so she even said she liked went in research me and found out that I was ah trustable guy I guess but it worked and that's how I got to shoot joe wagner here's another and obviously we did her hair make up really big and she looks nothing on the show she's very girl, next door type thing, but that's my job, wagner store it's pretty crazy it was done through twitter and I went and sought her, you know, I said let's do a shoot to get it wasn't like some crazy gig that I landed, so let it tell this story and again, this is part of the image of most known for the years ago, my first year of shooting, I was a huge image and heat fan and their reach out to her on flicker actually, uh, how long it's been? Because then every slicker anymore, but and crazy enough she was on flicker, but anyway, she responded today, I love your work I'm actually doing a show in nashville soon let's do a shoot, and so she literally had ten minutes to do a photo shoot, and so I show up to the studio and I grab like just a few frames probably I don't know twenty to thirty shots total, but one of them with her holding this deer head and this image is it doesn't really work. The deer head was just really random, I mean just didn't love the deer head and I didn't love the wall, but I loved her left her face should really soft profile onda loved her oh here like whole profile of her works and there's a good story to about how you can send them saving image right? You can take an image that was crap and turn it into something more beautiful so wanted to photo shop I've got a long history and photo shop and I started like created this weird, ethereal background of clouds and this is ah photo just feel that I took in gatlinburg of all places in tennessee and then I want removed her, removed the deer head or moved all the weird stuff and put her over this field and then I just basically went to town and photo shop and brought in all these textures and did these blurring techniques and a lot of crazy stuff and in the end I landed on this image and all the time I've had colleges tell me, hey, we're trying to steady this image how did you do this? And so this has kind of been, uh the image I guess like a settlement for but I just love how it came out when they were soft hands and are the expression on her face and I mean, when I was a kid there was a poster mma's garfield posters that were on the wall like that would try to inspire you or whatever, but one of the poster said half of art is knowing where to start and half the other half is knowing when to stop and this is one of those images where like all of sudden is like them that is done like I did work for hours working on this image and then use hit this place in photo shop it's like the end done, you know and so that's my image in store but the cool thing about that ten minutes and be reaching out on flicker was that started a relationship with image in and we've actually done four sheets now we did one in l a we did one in london at her house when I was on the britney spears tour and just a few months ago we went to iceland together of all places so I ended up in iceland with image in this was on a mountain and like fifty degree winds I mean we were literally about to be blown off top of this mountain and you know, she's just being indigent doing her crazy he poses and probably my all time favorite shoot because of the experience my friend austin man went with me and this is us there's no plans, no big crew no no diva image in is so laid back and I mean it was like minus twenty degrees is freezing I was like in five layers of you know, whether tech gear and all that crap and image in is just never complained once like I have celebrities that complain if it gets below seventy one degrees in the studio but here image and was on top of mountain being blown away and she's just amazing um share a few more images from that ship yeah, we just drive around, hop out of the car do some more photos jump on him out barefoot she's insane here she is just wearing this crazy scarf um with glaciers I mean, why not behind us? Awesome. And I took the pro photo be one lights have been if you're curious, those lights really are amazing and they're not asking me to say that I'm saying that because it's the truth these things last all day the quality of lights amazing there's no better back it's it's so weird to hold a soft box with a strobe and started with nothing attached like how is that possible? You know, so my friend austin was just walking around this big soft box with no cables no nothing just to the b one light inside and we're lighting image in that way um but that's my image in story it all started that whole relationship years of shoots began with an email on flicker you know it's insane so tim tebow story same kind of thing for years ago I was at a shape which I am again now actually, um but one of the shooting or one of the ship is jim called the one I was like when I do some shots free all in exchange you can let me work out for free goods like super expensive I said sure and then one day tim tebow came in okay can you take a shot of some nfl players we have actually he was in florida at the time and so it took a shot tebow and not thinking too much about it but a few months later I got a call hey, we want to use that shot for tim's but cover and he's releasing the autobiography and so I ended up landing his autobiography cover through that quick shoot a d one which then led to other shoots for d one and more football players this was dumb cas ou for detroit misting story I don't I can't show that image because all the rights to it but same kind of thing I was shooting a concert for ah record label and they told me not to get head shots of all the artists just shoot the concert that I knew that was going to be my only time to shoot stink so I went ahead and set up my lights backstage ignored the direction of my art director, which I don't necessarily recommend but um ah set of backstage and I got a portrait of all the artists is sting david foster paula cole was like just a slew of really, really famous musicians and as I can just see the concert think afghanis grab a quick catch up on things like sure, yeah, why not so she's thinking, oh, and by the way, I was super star struck like I don't get star struck, but you know, chris farley skit from saturday night live was so time when you're in the police that was awesome, you know, the whole it was that kind of moment where I was I was shaking like all the guys you're so amazing um but if you go on the website, you can see my shot of staying and he was super nice, but I was totally geeking out that was my first year the photographer and one of my first shoots like to go from zero to shooting sting was just bananas I was texting my wife for a while you're not gonna believe what just happened and then afterward the our director was actually thankful that I had done that because it turns out she didn't have the guts toe ask for this portrait she was too afraid to bother the celebrities for those shots, but she was thankful that I got him because then they could use them so you have to use discretion in those moments am I going to ruin my career in this or is this a safe gamble to take? And in that moment I realized it was a fairly safe gamble for me to take and the label is very thankful that I had that you know that I have the nerve to do that. Um so the taylor story the same kind of thing I called him two years like haganah set up shop backstage and cmt awards on the shoot quick portrait of all the artists come through and thankfully we had a little bit of a relationship at that point they said sure let's let's give it a shot so then they call it a because either people magazine or ok magazine to do a story on two at the time taylor was nobody. She was not taylor swift. She was just brand new artist and so that night I got to see blake shelton, taylor swift carrie underwood um, shit sugarland uh, there are a slew of others like just probably twenty a list country artists that night um contain the walk through price took five shots of each other but to this day, once again oh, jeremy shot taylor swift. You know it's like this huge the little do they know that was a hustle mode that was me taking the initiative the braver, if you will to make that call cannot do this so so now if you really wantto sting taylor tim tebow all these artists so much of that isn't this magic cloud where I land all these amazing gigs you have to hustle you have to go out there take those those brave, bold steps because the worst they can say is no right like who knows that if an artist is coming to your town or if there's a local gig even if you're a small town all kinds of musicians come to those towns to play gigs or at least in a big city close by and so there's always ways toe get yourself in the door on the cool thing is once you're in the door every step gets easier after taylor is easier and they want to shut sting oh you shut and then like each is a step up the ladder and now people think on this you know whatever famous celebrity photographer but it's all you know my agent and my team has helped but a lot of it has just been this crazy bold steps of faith what if you have to have to ask yourself over and over? What if I tried this? What if I pursued that shoot and so and have a bunch more of the stories I could talk all day and this kind of stuff um but think about that like how can you take that next bold step at home to pursue your dream you know whether whether it's not a specific person but even just a dream in general what can you do to get their um I always tell people my worst day working for myself it's still better than my best day working for somebody else so if you're currently at a job and you you have that dream of working for yourself it is hard it's it's it's brutal I mean when they say roller coaster freelance photography you know always like this even to this day I still have the lola valleys the big swings but those low valleys are still better and more worth it than the days when I was, you know, building websites for whatever ad agency had a consistent paycheck at the time add health benefits all that stuff but I would still take my valleys running my own career running moon job any day over working, you know and it's hard you know the economy's changed any creative industry is much harder these days but uh if you can find a way to make a work it is just immensely an amazing journey. So back to back to this stuff I want to tell you a quick story about a very different celebrity shoot that just happened last year while shooting a big show for the oprah winfrey network and discovery channel and the shooter really, really insane like you have like fourteen actors come in and that idea of the actors we had their publicist and their their their managers and it's like sometimes the handler is going to be more, you know, more difficult than the actual artists but this day and that goes for all of those big shoots I mean, just working at that scale there's a lot of pressure, a lot of money they put in the issues they're big budget jobs and it's all on you to nail the shoot to know the art direction teo make the celebrities happy to get your leading right now that chris I mean there's so many factors in fact, a couple years ago saw a shot of tiger woods and espn and head probably eighty five hundred look like one hundred arrows drawn around tiger and he was doing his golf swing and it was like keep your head down, keep her elbow, you know, like every part of his body has to do something specific to make that shot work and a lot of ways the same goes for photography, especially on those big budget shoes because I'm like care my settings right in my flattering her thighs that she thinks they're too big and knowing that creative direction that the art director has planned for weeks on is that light in the right is my assistant talking so much is the music playing the wrong song is you know is the dresses that wrinkle make her stomach looked too big like there's? So many things you think about when you're doing a big shoot on that scale is completely overwhelming um and so I did this you for oprah winfrey network and discovery last year super nerve racking I mean it's like you're just on the line just knocking the shot so you don't have much time to connect because it's like you get a celebrity for ten minutes on the next one comes with an excellent like a it's like they just bring him in one of the time and I'm just like they're pushing a button and I direct a little bit but it's not like you're getting toe really chat with a person and get to know um but this guy walks on on said john schnatter, you might know john from dukes of hazzard and, uh well, that's if you're old like me but he's been in a lot of other shows since then, but he's just a great guy and we had a great time talking, but he comes on set and he's really nice and it's earth giving off, you know, he's just in a great mood having a blast, huh? And he starts doing he's a candidate it's um a presidential uh, impressions so he's like this is my nixon and I think this next one he said this is my obama is really funny but I forget who this was but he starts really just goofing off and I'm really impressed that his ability to teo to do these impressions and he nailed the other shots to me it is really professional but fun to like we were having a great time and so then it comes back on set me here he comes up to me he walks off we wrap becomes the two says can you take a few more sounds like yeah sure no problem so he walks back on set and he goes in like super serious mood like just dead serious and this is the next shot I take and it looks like he's crying and some like what is going on um has another shot and the close up of that shot you see the tears in his eyes that I meant this is an amazing impression have a president but it turns out I'm here's another shot so I think about five shots and it felt so awkward at that point I was like this is legit this isn't acting and so I walked up to him and I put my camera down I just hugged him I just walked up to him and embracing cause I could tell something was going on and he whispered in my ear my dad got an hour ago and so he had been able to get through that shoot laughing, doing his impressions, knowing his father had just passed away and the last shot I took he came ever looked at the computer? He said that's the one so what do you mean? He said that's my dad looked just like my dad in that photo um and that was it. He walked he walked off, set straight to the airport to fly home to be with his family. But it's just john amazed me because first we'll hear the professionalism to finish the job, finish his work. But then he had the thought to capture that moment that deep, deep grief on camera like I that would have never been my first who in their right mind would found that about the death of a parent go can you take my picture? But I was so moved by that in a few months later like I let time pass and I finally reach out things like man, would you mind if I shared that story? It's just it's really powerful everybody has has loved ones and, you know everybody can relate to this. And thankfully he said yes, and I also got permission from the tv network to share this story, which I'm very grateful for, but it just hit me so deeply that he was that vulnerable and that honest on camera that I don't think any of us would never really do the same thing? And so I share the storm a blogging and went super, of course I went super viral, um, and it just shows you that our culture we do long to see story we do long to see, to see a genuine reaction, I think that's why I went, why went viral? Because you think about like, every day we're scrolling through twitter and facebook and it's just it can be so much noise that sometimes sometimes it's depressing because you're comparing yourself to the lives of others, that man, if only I had that gig or if only I looked that good if only I was on that vacation if only I had that much money there's so many things that they can be depressing about social media for may have been super depressed lately about world events like manifestly another. Another news story on terrorists killing more people. I'm going, you know, it's just killing me. Um, but to see the john schneider story, to see a real genuine moment of a celebrity in the middle of a shoot to go there, you know, to be honest about something in his personal life was really a moment that I'll never forget, and I've never experienced that this kind of moment on a celebrity shoot and so just tension because in all that chaos of ah tv shoot you know where so much is happening like at time to stop tina and I brought in the the art directors and the creator of the whole team we all just sit sat around the monitor and just stared at these images like wow, this is this is so much more important than what we're doing today and so yeah that's my that's my john stories so fast forward a few months and uh I had my own my own crazy story happened so um january fifth of this year two thousand fourteen um I have two older brothers I'm the youngest of three we have an awesome family my oldest brother is a photographer as well shit wedding photographer metal brothers a singer songwriter we're all and the creative creative world I'd say that sounds glamorous but it's more the aivd forgetful world um but says it my brother season survivor winnings are really, really talented um that was this is just a dinner this is uh calling mike that so we caught him with his whole life but he eventually changed his name or get to that in a minute but this is mike and his two kids know and raise monies nephew so on january thirty first of this year our middle brother benji moved back to nashville after like, gosh, a decade of living around the countries have finally were all together as brothers and and all the kids cousins were together family and so january thirty first we decide the three of us we're going to take our daughters to a daddy daughter dance and so we all went tio to the church you know, daddy daughter dance and each of us take our daughters and it was an amazing night and actually, mike, this is mike's facebook post it's the daddy daughter brothers day jeremy cara benji character and it was an amazing night um at one point and the night they had a snow machine you know, firing fix no throughout the audience are thrilled all the dead and it's like you're really annoying because the gun in your gun, your eyes and everybody was using to get them but I'm I had thought for a photo you know me being, uh photographers like look so cool ah and meanwhile none of the dead were dancing because they're all not dancers, but anyway, I was like, you got to take this photo and so I wanted to be in the photo though, because I wanted to throw my daughter into this fake snow I just thought I'd be a cool shot and I had my thing my fuji film makes one hundred s with me and so handed mike the camera and I was like, dude, can you keep take the shots even get the snow the light behind my daughter susan give me throwing her into the air and so so we took a few shots and of course by that time the whole place is watching us throw my daughter into there and take pictures um yeah, we probably tried the three or four times and I saw the shot was like that that that's the shot I wanted and he nell it because he's a great photographer. So february twenty seventh fast ford a month mike writes this post april two thousand. For almost ten years ago I entered into one of the darkest seasons in my life. I was let go from a job beginning the divorce process, moving into my parentshouse and having no money. I had been a musician and working for churches my whole life and all the same god had ripped everything away. I had nothing my heart would absolutely break every single time that I had to drop off my kids that their mom's house I suddenly thought I was living in hell. But in that darkest of times, god gave me a gift before two thousand four, I wouldn't have ever guessed that I would one day be a photographer and a wedding photographer that god has a very it's a funny sense of humor I moved out of my kid's house moved out of my parentshouse on wednesday my very first wedding to shoot was that following saturday you could just imagine the emotions that I was feeling that day but in the midst of the deep sadness something inside of me came alive gave me hope told me to hang on because things would get better I found myself being caught up in this couple's love story instead of dwelling on the hell that I was living in and that's how it all began that's how I became a photographer I fell in love with capturing people stories capturing their souls and their emotions and their beautiful moments and I look back over these past years and I'm totally blown away at the place of the god is eleven to travel to capture people stories in fact three days a leave from maui hawaii for a shoot and I keep pinching us of asking are you kidding me? Is this my real life god is so good don't give up on your dreams and many opposed to jeremiah twenty nine eleven for I know the blames I have for you plans to prosper you and not to harm you plans to give you hope in the future so today almost ten years to the darkest time in my life I probably announce to you my first ever fully customized website thank you so much tio the web team for their amazing customer service and web is on so here it is the new mark studios dot com so that was the launch of his new website his story over the past ten years so february twenty seven so four days later three three or four days later march second of this year he's at the airport going to hawaii like he said in that last post on I'm at the airport going to w p p I in vegas so we're at the airport at the same time we don't get to see each other but I'm literally sitting on the plane having this takes with him he is sitting inside the airport um and he said you left yet and I said no I'm on the plane he said all right have a safe flight have fun in vegas and said sweet I don't know why a little high for me he said I show will we got to take all the kids there one day that would be epic ha said definitely in some gold necklaces we always more than one went away his kids and we looked super eighties um that said I mean we're taking off later and he said when you get back tuesday art cia and then he said did you missed all the fun tons of flights canceled and said wow crazy while the canceled flights and said ice storms all over the midwest so fast forward aa few hours and I'm in vegas I met w p p I and I'm on stage and literally a room of five hundred people in the audience I'm like about to start my talk to get to and fro talk similar to two today and I get this text from my mike's ex wife and she says a german call me asap numb one one so again I'm on stage about to deliver to enough our talk and um and so called her and she said mike has been found unconscious we don't know what's going on but we'll keep you posted and so I was like, whoa ok, so I told my audience and debbie creepy I I said hey there's something happening I might need to answer my phone in a few minutes and so yeah winning in my talk and I'm like deep into my talk talking about lighting and all kinds of no important things and uh some iphone starts buzzing on the podium like nonstop and finally an audience member I don't know her name but she she stopped me and I talked to jeremy should probably answer your phone but I had been so involved in my talk that I just also distracted anyway I was like, you know what? You're right I'm sorry guys I'm answer my phone so hopped off stage and uh is my dad and he said jeremy he's gone oh man so awkwardly get back up on stage weeping at this point it's the guys I got to go my brother just passed away and some people walked up on stage and you know give me a hug and oddly enough you think of you at home watching no more brother look identical to my brother in this photo but there was you know, live on state w p p r so I had to bail on my talk and uh so go I go back to my room and my buddy met uh uh from australia was walking with me to take me back to my room and I couldn't stop thinking about the john schneider story you know, I kept thinking like man what was he thinking? Tio two do portrait's right after hearing about his dad's death but I thought man, it would be such a powerful pay afford moment to do that you know, to do the same thing and so when we get to the hotel room I had matt er I sat by the window a mat tick portrait of me in that moment you know, finding out about my brother's death it is really inching I found that literally physically impossible toe look the camera and the I just couldn't do it but he snapped a few the same way I had then with john um and this is basically me losing it and so way took these pictures real briefly and that was it I gave my huggins told him I needed a loan time quiet time so he left and sadly enough that day the airports were shut down nashville was shut down due to the ice storms I couldn't get home and so I start tweeting, you know, once again the power of social media start tweeting about what's going on like guys I have to get home but super urgent does anybody know of anything and after this is by the way, this is almost like ten o'clock at night it's super late I mean even but where airports open, they're probably new flights available, so I get a call from some old friends connections ahead and they to this day don't want to be named they want to be anonymous, which is just amazing, but they said, jeremy, we're gonna fly home on a private jet way we've we've already booked it all you have to do is go to this airport anger and find this plane this captain and they're going to fly home tonight in middle of storms um so here's a quick picture of take out thea that the plan is literally only passenger me and two pilots I was the only person on the point to this day easily the kind of thing anybody has ever done for me um here is that it was is in disbelief at this point I can't believe I can't believe I'm flying home right now um this is a shot I took out the window uh you know that the next morning because we fly over night back to the east you gain time and anyway so the clouds were starting to appear again in the the were above some clouds and it just like this look like this beautiful phil you knows his gorgeous and so yeah I gotta get home in the middle of the ice storm and it took me a ten minute drive took about an hour because the roads were solid ice and I did about five miles an hour all the way home but I finally got home to my family thanks to this angel that literally flew me home in the middle of the night so fast forward a five days and uh you know photography is such an interesting thing in this world this media technology world we're living in because I had the job we're planning is a memorial service and that's like man this is going to be super media heavy and I need to be the one that plans the memorial service my parents don't know computers and technology and I need to figure this out so I had the job of of inheriting all my brothers devices his computers, iphones, ipads and I had to unlock him and it's so weird to be dumped into somebody's digital life could you imagine that stranger just being in your world all of sudden, you know, whether it's, whether you have bad things and they're not just your life is your life, but to be dumped in the my brother's life was it turned out to be such an amazing way to grieve like it was because I watched all his iphone did it all up because there were literally thousands and thousands of, you know, photos and videos, but, um, I mean, for a week, solid twenty four seven all day, every day I I was going through and or carving and finding all his his best photos and best moments, best videos, and it was just a beautiful way to grief, like, since that week, I haven't cried about his death because that process just allowed me to excel and two degree him, but and so at the time came for his memorial service, and we did it in the church we grew up in. This is a shot that I took from the stage, keeping my my family group singing in the search together, we were like, the brady bunch, you know? We're like the fivesome, all singing together, perfect harmony, all that good stuff, but this is the stage was saying from I'm a home church and hendersonville and said just to get a quick shot and mike's body was right behind me when I took this and so we did the memorial service which are left iata tow watch if any of your home this whole all these images and this story's on my block it's actually the latest story jeremy cowart dot com and the whole memorial services on their unity have interest in watching after the memorial service I'm so overwhelmed you know, if somebody does young it's really interesting because all of your life comes together because everybody is still I mean my brother was forty three so my friends and family from all walks of life from junior how from high school from college from now alec everybody came to this event and there was just his beautiful ah beautiful day really to celebrate mike, but during all that I did need a quiet moment until walked into this room by myself and we're just sitting there and I looked up and there was literally this crazy rainbow on a chair and maybe in the geeky photographer like walked up like where is the light source coming from? And I literally confronted this rainbow did not make sense in that moment um and so grab my phone take a picture of it and it was gone as soon as I got the picture the rainbow is gone and, you know, they say they say death has our lar levin's have an interesting way of visiting us after they're gone and, you know, I'm not I'm not superstitious or whatever, but I can't help but believe this is one of those moments where this rainbow in this chair made no sense, but but here was that little moment that was is gone in an instant, and so it has been inching that the photos since mike's death there's so many little stories that keep happening in this next one is probably the most powerful. So my brothers and my dad and I were me, my middle brother benji ma, we're all moving my parents out of their house into mike's house because they wanted to keep the house from mike kids in tow to just keep keep his house and apparent tells two big all that good stuff anywhere, we're helping them move out, and my dad and my brother and moving big couches and lifting heavy things, and I'm the arts a photographer over here, like shooting crap, you know? And then and I'm moving a coffee table and I took the glass the big sheet of glass off the coffee table, and I put the glass and the grass and within. Immediately just stunned at the image of what a big sheet of glass looks like on the ground in glass because you see the reflection sky above you but you see the ground it's just a really interesting the economy and says like dead been gary let me think let me think what picture? Of course they're like sweating into nineties and degrees of the lifting couch and I wait why are we taking pictures right now? This is not the time for pictures, but I had them come over like really quick iphone photo once again that can't the best cameras someone with with you um and we just leaned over the glass like this and I had my iphone and I just took a quick shot and that was that we all walked away went on to our business but after I looked at the shot I was like, oh my gosh um so it's hard to see probably but my dad's fader here my feet are here a the bottom brother's feet or here and to have the three of us leaning over. But what I realized is that the fourth para feed my brother oldest brothers, you're missing his they're gone and not only that, but his missing silhouette is on the side of the sky heaven if you will um and here we all are all are in the trees in the world below and not only that but this is the grass that we all grew up playing in together this is our backyard this is where we ran and fought and argued and mowed the line and play basketball and football and on top of that is the last day to be a that house is this is the end of that yard in that grass and so I was immediately just done found about the meeting and I photo because in the moment none of that fazed me that I took it anyway and his later that all those different meanings came into play and now like my dad like jeremy can you like frame that picture really big and send it to me and the because we are realized how powerful that quick little iphone moment was so is uh was april twenty six june fifteenth was father's day and after you lose somebody every first is it is a really hard day to get through and so father's day was really tough so out of respect for him and toe we released balloons into the sky and in his honor take a few pictures of the obviously fast forward to august eighth another inch using moment another weird iphone ah grieving kind of story um we ah we're in the backyard playing football the cousins together and I had reese mike's daughter sit on a chair and a turn your iphone on and this is part of my instagram portrait q a project um said holder iphone and turn on the flashlight so she did and I was immediately dumbfounded because the lens flare of the iphone flashlight was cutting right through her body like you see it, it goes straight through her face and all the way down through her leg and once again being the nerdy for tire brands like what if I can change the lens flare? I don't like going to your face so literally turned my phone even change the angle dinner and I had heard in the same we both were turning our phones to see if I get in no matter which way we both changed that that light stayed all the way through her body. I was so fascinated by that so I was like, ok, it's not going where someone had took this portrait over and once again it's like you can't help but think like this just like cutting like her dead right through the middle ever and it's hard to see but there's all these rays just beaming out of being out of the middle ever and, uh yeah stellar one of those moments to get me again I'm not usually like into these kind of stories that have been so blown away by these little moments, especially considering they're all little you know iphone shots and it's pretty unbelievable by the way, with the glass and aggressive but I try to reshoot that with my dslr because I was like, I gotta have a high res version of this being the door and of course it it wasn't the same it was that it was that one moment that was meant to be so fast forward to last week actually weaken half ago mike's birthday is september fourth and uh he we're all dreading it, you know, it's just a horrible, horrible thing to have to face and but my brother middle brother benjamin has what they've also seven in the process of adopting a child from sierra leone, africa and crazy enough as hard as he likes birthday wass the day benji brought his child home was on september fourth mike's birthday so now we have a reason to grieve on september fourth and the reason to celebrate so we have a new member of our family that came home to us on september fourth, so so yeah, that's that's the story that I'm thankfully made it through all that didn't didn't awkward week that's always good um yeah he's the story so obviously, like, I'm you know a celebrity photographer and people know me as that, but I hope that you're hearing today that you know, life is so much bigger than that and and I love to think about you know, going through his life his digital live it's like what story are we all telling? Like if you go through your camera roll today on your iphone or whatever phone you use like what story is that telling what? What is the beginning of your digital legacy? You know what? What do your grandkids going to think when they google you one day assuming google is still around, you know? And you know, at the end of the day I don't want my kids so dead two out of the burning spears or he was a celebrity star that's so cool I want them to know the dad was documenting and telling a bigger story with his life like it's always some that's going through my head what story about telling every tweet opposed or every like in my being negative and my being you know, what are my kids going to think about this one day? One of my friends got to think about what you know one of my friends says there two types of people in the world showers and drains and I love that because it's like there's so many people on twitter or social media, their dream they're just complaining, you're there there's haters there's so much negativity and I always want to try to be a shower both through my work through the things issue the stories I tell on the way I live my life, you know, the way I love my family and my wife and my children and uh and I love tio funnel all that through photography and through the through the stories I'm telling, but thanks for everybody for listening and for crying with me, I've seen a few of you tearing up and maybe you're tearing up a tone, but I'm glad I made through the first half so far, I tried really hard not to cry, it was nearly impossible. One thing k brown is in the chat room, and they said that they found it incredibly uplifting to watch you use your passion to grieve, which I thought was a really cool statement that was amazing. Thank you for sharing all of that with us. Yeah, I love the shower of the drain thing, I will remember that forever that's, that's such a great way to put it, and every time you're going to do something, have you asked yourself that question route? Right? Then you're really you know, putting that so that lens which I love they're contributing, contributing positively and you do want to take a couple questions or when you feel like that would love to do that let's do that if you have any questions in the audience, go ahead after seeing that you have incredible, incredible, like, meaningful, deep, amazing work through this made you feel that you're known or the jur a profession kind of like income stuff is based on things that will be considered more superficial like that has no, not not even close to the same value like he just projected image instead of like something that it can really work you up, like, how the same that you feel like you're us assad were like working on like the industry itself yeah, I mean, I feel like they go hand in hand I mean, my work is a professional on this is a celebrity for tarver commercial photographer like that, what that does is that gives me the ability to have a platform like, I probably wouldn't be here if I hadn't shot a lot of famous people, you know, that's what I've built my but I love to turn that attention that's basically like not to use too geeky terms here, but you think of a reflector board you're taking, I'm taking the attention that's hitting me as a celebrity commercial photographer and I try to bounce that back to things that matter you know, like you look at a bottom is the ultimate example loving or hating he's he's in the attention of u two to talk about world politics or whatever issue aids air and I love that I'm not comparing myself it all to bono, but I think he can he sets a pretty cool example billy, if you do achieve success if you do something amazing use that platform two point two things that really matter because most celebrities they don't they don't do that they're just told ego it's all how do we get more money? How do we become more famous and then we lose that they freak out but you know, on a very, very small, minuscule, minuscule scale in this photo industry had the small platform and I left tio use that world of success and commercial to talk about things that matter. And by the way, the next half of what I'm going to be teaching is even bigger stories to me that they're not bigger but mme or the humanitarian side of what I do and so yeah, I think they go hand in hand to answer a question like, I don't I don't pay that I shoot commercial stuff, I just think it all is one big mix of purpose, purposeful life. You know, if you are not familiar with help portrait generally founded something called help portrait where you offer portrait's to people who can't actually afford them that's every december and that's I've seen so many lives personally changed by that so he's used that as a method in order to help so many people, I mean, I don't even know you couldn't even count the amount of people that help portrait has helped, but that's just an incredible thing. If you guys don't know about help portrait, please check that out. Yeah, I'll be telling this story will be on the next half. So cool. All right, well, we didn't help portrait here created the first of them. That was very cool. All right, so a question it came in from greg. How do you plan on preserving all the these photos that you have? Is that photo books online storage park it's a great question. What do you what do you do? So currently, uh, thankfully, I mcgee take ambassador, which means I get lots of hard drives from g tech and, uh, and I really do before I'd worked with them, I really did use their drugs. I mean, they're amazingly dependable drugs, but I have tons of our drugs, and I make sure everything's backed up in several locations. Obviously, um, I am colonel, in the process of digitizing all our vhs tapes from remember, I'm I'm trying to be the like, family arc archivist. And so what about beta beta tapes? Probably probably somewhere, and so I'm trying to preserve it all. I try to print as much as I can tow, but my family can never have enough prints, you know, like so if it gets overwhelming but it's a tough question I mean, between all the social media and web sites and facebook and printing, it gets hard to really capture it all captured on there's thousands and said you have drives that like your pet, your parentshouse or do you do all that cross? Well, I don't have to actually do have a drive opinion tells you have some of the videos that have already or cops beyond the goal is for everybody to have a hard drive you have everything ever that's that's the eventual goal that I'm slowly wait. Yeah, exactly ok, I'll take one from more from online and I think we have another audience question this is from kyle, who said, when you reach out to celebrities or others that you would like to shoot, is that a paid assignment for you? Or do you do it for trade to build up your portfolio? It's been both can work where hey, I'd love to shoot you, but there's going to be a budget involved and they usually knew that because it because a lot of sense of like actually we were wanting to do issue, we have an album coming up and we need to do and so then that's when I you know if you have someone in your life that's working on the manager they can play back up right and so my business manager or come and say ok so here's the rate here's how it's all gonna work but you just have to play that by your could sometimes it is just a really wanna photograph you and I really want you in my portfolio and I really want to help you and so yeah there have been some sheets for trade basically we're give them some good head shots for free you know I don't generally encourage giving your work away from free but there had been scenarios where it's just the obvious especially if I'm doing the one reaching out certainly there have been some shoots like that but they've also been shoots where even the reach out I still get a nice paycheck you know? So they can work both ways right now all right, go ahead so my question is I guess about balance maybe you'll get into that more later but so you have you done this celebrity shooting and then you've created some ways to give back and I'm curious like when you like when were you able to start giving back? Have you always given back to your photography and sort of I guess the business aspect of that like when do you decide to do that in that direction? Yeah, that that's most of what I'm talking about in the next hour and a half so we're about to dive much deeper into that in terms of balance is that's a good topic? I haven't covered because they get all as told him howto bounce family and travel and work and I tell people just to choose family every chance you get I mean their days where my wife knows I have to work all day and all night and I'm not going to be home but then she knows and I know that there that's like tomorrow like I get saying seattle all weekend and hang out and meet up with people on twitter and stay hang with you guys but I'm flying back home first thing in the morning to spend the rest of weekend with my family so that's what it looks like two to balance it just every chance you get you choose you choose family she's what you love and so you know, on I have a very trusting wife you know there's not there's not a lot of spouses that yeah go on three months who are the britney spears? Go shoot, you know beautiful women and beautiful people but more trust me toe tio be a man basically and and the more she trust me, the more I want tio further earn that trust that it's almost backwards, I think, to the way a lot of people think. They think if you're jealous and that personal stop, if you trust them and sexually really only strengthens that relationship. Um, be a choose family as much as they can. And we'll get into. How do I balance the humanitarian stuff? And when I win, us chose to start doing that in the next segment.