The Real Goal of Marketing
To really get things started, I want to talk about the real goal of marketing, right. Let's go super basic, like super one-on-one. So yes, sales and marketing have changed but one thing hasn't changed. You've heard me allude to it a couple times, and that's humans. Human beings haven't changed. Digital, the web, all this stuff is new, but people are still people. And the things that drive humans are every bit as real and true today as they were back when we were letting our fingers do the walking in those big yellow books, right. So what I want you to keep in mind, 'cause I realize we have a diverse array of people in the audience, you know, we've got a diverse array of people at home that are watching this. We got people all over the place in all different types of businesses. I want you to keep this in mind. H2H, H2H. It is not B2B, it is not B2C, I reject those distinctions. You are a human selling to humans. I have sold everything online from makeup brushes to industrial water filt...
ers to desalinization plants, and I can tell you on both ends of the transaction was a human. Both sides, a human with a very specific need. A human that desperately needed a solution to a problem. Never forget that. Never forget, never lose sight of that. If we can keep this in mind, you're going to hear me reference back. I'm going to keep using relationship as an analogy to talk about marketing processes, because it is, it is a relationship. Yeah it's a sales transaction, but it is still a relationship. So I think ultimately if we want to be great marketers the question that we need to ask ourselves is how does human intimacy happen in the first place. How does it happen? 'Cause you got to kinda trust somebody to give them your money, to give them a significant amount of your money. I want you to imagine if a stranger were to walk up to you, you may have experienced this, had a stranger walk up to you on the street and say, "Hey, can I borrow some money, my car is broken down." And if they said, "Can I have a dollar?" you'd probably give them a dollar, right. Has anybody done that, or are you all just like horrible selfish people? You are a horrible, selfish person or you've done it?
Okay, I didn't know what you were agreeing to. Yeah, right, we would give them a dollar, because we share humanity, right? But what if the person came up and said, "Hey, my car broke down, can I have 100 dollars?" It would be like, "Do I know you?" Right, and think about that. "Do you I know you." We're trying to suss out... did something go down that I completely forgot? So thinking about this question, how does human intimacy happen, I think, is a critical question to ask as we move into marketing. Now I wasn't the first person to pose that question. There was actually a zoologist by the name of Desmond Morris, who asked this question. He said, "I've been studying animals for a while, I want to study the human animal. And figure out how does intimacy happen between humans? It's fascinating, I've got this photograph that documents the moment before I met my wife, we were strangers, and now we have four kids together. How did that happen?" And so Desmond Morris wrote this book Intimate Behavior, I recommend reading it, or you could just Google "Desmond Morris Intimate Behavior," there's also blog posts if you don't want to read an entire book. But the basic aspect of his study is he determined there are 12 stages of human intimacy. 12 stages. Starts out eye to body. Eye to body. I see someone else, and I find them attractive. That's stage one, eye to body. Then we get into eye to eye, we make eye contact. Then we go voice to voice, we're talking, we're having a conversation, we're beginning to engage. Hand to hand, we're shaking hands. Arm to shoulder, right? Patting someone on the shoulder. You got politicians who will do that like come in, they'll do the pat, right? It's because they know we can kind of skip, you know, get on down there to stage five real quick, let's build that intimacy up. Now you get arm to waist, a hug. Got any huggers in the room? All right, you're a hugger? So you walk up to people and you're like, "Ah!" and some people are like (hisses), right? It's 'cause you're skipping a few steps. Now you're seeing you're not skipping so many that it's not technically assault, but that's why some people get a little bit weirded out. We now have some biological research behind why you may be freaking people out. But that's okay, you don't have to change for us. So we got stage six, arm to waist, we're hugging. Mouth to mouth, we're kissing. Hand to head. Think about that, touching someone's head and face. You ever have the aunt that would come up and pinch your cheeks? Imagine how weird it would be if a stranger walked up to you and they shook your hand, and then they touched your face. You'd be like, "What?" You'd freak out, right? 'Cause that's weird, that's stage eight. Stage eight. Hand to body, mouth to body, hand to you-know-what, and bow chicka wow wow, I believe is the technical term. So these are the twelve stages of human intimacy. Now what's fascinating about this is he's studying all different types of application, and he found that across the board, this is generally how intimacy happens. And what was interesting is Desmond Morris determined that the rate of progression through these 12 stages was not in and of itself a determinant of success. What do I mean by that? What I mean is you could have a couple that could start at eye to body, and go all the way through to bow chicka wow wow in one night, and both of them go, "That was pretty good. That was A-OK." The rate of progression through the 12 stages is not in and of itself a determinant of success, but do you know what is? You cannot skip. Specifically, if you skip more than two, that's when people begin to feel assaulted. If you skip more than two. So what does this tell us about marketing? What it tells us about marketing is that often times our sale cycles can be faster than we maybe believe that they can be. But woe to you if you skip a step. If you skip a step, there is no going back. If you walk up to somebody, if you're a guy and you walk up to somebody at a bar and be like, "Hi, nice to meet you, want to go back to my place and get freaky?" And they're like, "No." You're like, "Haha, just kidding! Can I buy you a drink?" There's no going back! You're a weirdo. You're a total weirdo, you can't undo that. And in the business world, it's the same. It does hurt to ask. If you've ever been told it doesn't hurt to ask, of course it hurts to ask. If you ask too soon, the person says no, you've increased the chances they're gonna say no in the future. It does hurt to ask, so write this down. The goal of marketing is not to merely generate awareness. That's advertising. The goal of marketing is not merely to generate awareness, it's a part of it. It's also not to close the sale, that's not what we're asking marketing to do. The goal of marketing is to move prospects and customers seamlessly and subtly through each phase of what we call the value journey, what others might call the customer journey. To move them seamlessly and subtly through each phase of this value journey.