Mentoring with Sue Part 3
On a scale of zero to ten there ben you sock ten being outstanding performance with the rate on the following so this is a really good one to go through and you're mentoring list how confidently do you feel when you speak about what you do? How confident do you how confidently do you tell people how much you cost owen easy mama how confident do you feel making business to business relationships? How confidently are you selling your product rate your overall marketing from syria to team rachel overall shooting rachel overall selling rachel overall photo shop raid your overall managing staff your overall production which is your turnaround and delivery time which is the biggest patio service because that will get you the most amount of referrals this's where most photographers fall down and the delivery of the product after it's been paid for when somebody has given you money and they're waiting for a product they will hate you for every day you're late in delivering their product they w...
ill hate you publicly and they will tell everybody that you took their money and they got nothing in return that is the one sure fire way to screw up your business right your overall money management because one of the few things I'm going to ask you is how well you receive money how well you value your product in service because that will tell me how much money you're going to in the next year if you can shift all of these things if you can see every one of these mentoring questions is challenges and get through everyone slowly just work through the page you turn over the page and it says how confidently do I speak about what I don't oh how confident they don't tell people how much I cost ok so I used to have this thing in my studio when I was a new photographer right go uh this one is too seventy five this one is for fifty this one is nine fifty meaning nine hundred and fifty for a cd by forty five in this guy looked to me one day and goes well nine dollars, fifty for a big photograph like that that's cheek and my heart just broke in that moment because I wanted to say it was nine hundred and fifty dollars but I couldn't now I got what I believed right in that moment I got somebody who did not value what I did and he did it on purpose he said it in such a smug way and it made me feel that big. So when I left that night I went there and I said to my friend I can't say it and she goes you can't want like I said, I can't say two hundred seventy five dollars for the eight by twelve, four hundred fifty dollars for the living by sixteen in the twenty four by city is nine hundred fifty these um mounted and ready for framing we give you three choices of framing for your portrait's what side would you like to order? I could not say that so do you know what I did? I walked along the beach and I repeated it until I could say it confidently and then I started to say it and I realized when I stopped talking as soon as they said it people would just make a choice and then I just shut up and got out of the way and that will change everything about how you're speaking because nobody put up their hands when I asked him how confidently they tell me how much I really want to own a range rover do you know how much they cost the supercharge ones like one hundred forty nine thousand dollars? So I walk into rain driver and I like this is my dream car he's like yeah one forty nine like a one hundred forty nine dollars for a range rover barred us not that I know what happened he knows what it's with I know what it's with so the only reason that that sale wouldn't happen if for some reason he didn't see the value in what he was telling me or couldn't say it was desperate all the energy and between all of the sudden there's so much energy in between it I really want you to get bitchy about yourself I want you to sit down about what trolls say about you I want you to listen to the truth and criticism I want you to look at yourself from the outside, pull yourself apart and say you know she's never going to make money she was there and then I want you to accept the truth recently something happened on facebook that fleet up it had my name on it I went to the thread don't read negative threat about you it's soul destroying and this guy wrote this really horrible things to this horrible thing about me and it really hit my feelings because I'm just a girl and and then I what I did was I went that night and I couldn't go that I keep saying it over and over again or that he said this about me and it was really hopefully doesn't even know who I am and he actually said that I make him sick like I make him physically sick and I was like oh god so I went to the mirror and I stood in front of the mirror and I looked myself in the eye and I said you make me sick and I said it to myself is that you make me sick I see you and I want to throw up in my mouth and I keep saying it to myself until I was like, wow he actually is not saying anything to me that I haven't said to myself, nothing anybody ever says to you is with them what you said to yourself off, so accept the truth in his criticism them and forgive him because you need to forgive yourself to question, right? Right? I get really nervous speaking in public study or don't I don't, uh I don't know why you look just like sigourney weaver is anybody ever told you that? Um, after I came to see you in new york, I went home terrified, and I tripled my prices and I changed my priceless, and I changed my website and I it was cricket. I was dead for, like, four months, and I'm sitting here cursing you ruined me, I was making did you find my facebook page? No, no, I didn't I was terrified, and I think I just blew it. I blew everything. I've been in business fifteen years making barely a profit, and I just blew it and then all of a sudden my phone started ringing and in one month in one month I made more money than I made for the ten years, so I could take that single statement times that by about five hundred that's, how many people have told me that in the last two years I just I just want people to know it that it works if you have to believe it and you do it and would do it twenty two thousand dollars in one month wow and I hadn't made that in here and you see me a beautiful gift and I love it you know different sent me a beautiful lantern for the light that shines and right now they sent me a beautiful apple because we met in new york and it was apple for the student for the teacher and I have both on one change the light that shines in the apple for the teacher and I love both of them a lot okay, so now mentoring list we hearing that we're not doing a lot of things we're not fronting up to a lot of truths were not something out to a lot of hard stuff to look at take a good hard look yourself accept the truth and criticism the trouble with most of us is we would rather be ruined by praised then saved by criticism it has had to be criticized it has had to be not good enough we spend all of the time telling ourselves we're not good enough we don't need other people to tell us we're not good enough look at yourself from the eyes of trolls be brutal this list will give you the most jolting realization in the realization is most of you I'm not owning up to what you're not doing for yourself are you really excited about what you're doing because if you're not excited about what you're doing you won't do it and it's really weird because remember I've already called out susan the thousand times we always laugh about it when she rang me and I like kev you daniel marketing about just you know I've been asking her for eight weeks were her marketing vultures were in every time I run her she's editing for the what are you doing right now your marketing vouchers and she goes yeah and I said what are you really doing? She said the editing video I think maybe you should get a video oh and I think you see the thing is is what you're doing you're already doing you just have to find a way to monetize it like if you find yourself you know eggs elling at social media then have you considered you could excel at social media for other photographers or teach them about it and make money doing it like whatever you're doing whatever you're spending most of your time doing is actually what you're really good at so maybe you should just step back and have a look at that and really consider what that is sometimes we see a destination but we see no past to get there we don't believe we're with that we can't do it all we can afford it the most incredible thing is is I used to stand on this grand canyon this bryce canyon and I would look across to the other side in the suit that I wanted to be was standing over there but I saw no way of getting across sometimes there are no on is is it feels like there is nothing but a grand kenyan between you and where you want to be but I'm telling you right now if you sit down and just look at it like this I can see a destination but I can't see a path there I either don't believe I can do it or don't believe I can have it or don't believe I deserve it if I believe I can do this if I believe I deserve this the way will be shown to me as soon as tomorrow when I wake up when I need guidance from my guts there's a question over here I'll go to bid and I will say to even microphone chris I will go to bid and I will say now if you pray to god or whoever you speak to I will say tomorrow morning I need enlightenment I need enlightenment about this situation I will wake up with the answer my instinct is so powerful I um I'm really having problems with defining what I want like I don't know what you do know what you want you do and you're crying because you you don't know how to let yourself have it everybody knows what they want when people tell me they don't know what they want really this just all these blocks and the noise and they're not worth it and they're so lacking in value but you know what you want it's like you feeling guilty about having things it's soon as you feel guilty you stopped having because you feel so guilty and you don't think you deserve it and you do and the thing is you can tell because why is that so emotional because it's so hurtful when what you want is right there and you know the ones stopping yourself from getting at right okay tell me what it was like I don't have problems with pricing and sailing and all of those things but now I have problems because I want to be long built an international career but I'm from argentina on argentina we speak spanish so I don't know whether due in spanish or in english or both and I'm just overwhelmed okay so you speak pretty good english and that means you speak two languages so you speak two of the most spoken languages in the world and you have the opportunity to do it in both languages to an audience that I can't speak to yeah so okay keep going with the block man come on come on you tell me where that block is why you crying right now could you not crying because you're crying on tv you were already crying why are you crying? I don't know I just feel everybody knows where they're crying because you know the biggest truth is right now how you feel inside that you don't want to speak about how you feel is your truth that you're truth the feeling is the one that you don't want to say but you can feel it you feel it so much that it will make you cry you feel it and you can't say it with your words because you can't acknowledge it you can't speak it and it will stay stuck inside you until you own up to what it is and I can't help you until you tell me what this come and tell me at lunchtime because if you don't want to tell all of these people in the three people that are watching from heim including my mom that's okay because what I need you to understand is you don't cry and this you feel so when you tell me you don't know what you want and you don't know how you feel, you just don't want to tell me and that's okay? I'll put you in a situation where you can tell me comfortably because I believe every one of you men and woman know what you want I know how you feel and you don't want to emotionally aren't up to it I would if I had money. You know how many times I hear that you are so lucky that you can have an ollie fan backdrop? You know how hard I worked for that backdrop? It was my dream to have a gnarly, faint background. Guess what now I own for now. You know, I wouldn't really had my priorities were for a knowledge fam backdrop. I didn't buy the range rover. Okay, I will say border face when I worked really hard for that, I didn't buy a range rover, and my brother still wants to know why I don't own a house. And I'm forty two because I didn't buy house because I bought four ali fan backdrops and a face one and I would really had for all of them. Thanks. Andy is he's buying his fourth house, but, you know, we have different priorities. So the truth is I've got this thing where I put in my mentoring where I got this is like oprah. You get a million dollars, you get a million dollars, you get a million dollars, everybody gets a million dollars it's under your feet right now, a million dollars, and what you're going to do is you're gonna take the million dollars and you can only start a business with it. And you know what I asked kina this christian that's like here here's your million dollars. What you gonna do in kennedy said fist I will help my mom and my sisters pay the mortgages and then ill do this and then I'll do this and then I do this massive. So right now you're up to about seven hundred eighty thousand dollars and you've given it away and she was like, oh, that's like so what winds came to getting the money it's just like what you have to give to other people because you can keep it for you and I think these guys your money, okay? And I need to start a business and you know what? Right now give me a million dollars my path wouldn't change. You gave me a million dollars right now our buy a range rover and another olive pam backdrop and then I will be on and then I can shoot this video and then I could shoot that video and then I can check this video and I know because the million dollars would not change my path and the truth is you do not need money to succeed. When you start to walk the path of your truth, the money will just materialize and then you will succeed cause that's how it works in the envelope under your seat people email may they say could you please post my workshop on your facebook no, I'm not going to support your workshop I don't know anything about you as a teacher as a photographer is a business owner so I would not subject you to my public that I've worked really hard to gain the trust ofthe until you can prove it to me you prove it to me then all you know and then I'll publish you and then they write back and they go well, I could have been successful if only you had allowed that yeah, I got two answers for you and the things that can facebook every time I've been on the right path my path has come to fruition you think it's the path of least resistance but the truth is the most amazing part about it is there is no resistance when you're on the right path because every single time that something has come to me it's because it's already happening I'm standing on the edge of announcing something. We're really big that I'm not allowed to tell anybody about because somebody saw one of my videos and they've offered me something that potentially would make me internationally known is a photographer and I'm so shocked by that, but when they offered it to me it was like I'm already doing it they just offered it with a bigger budget and they're paying for it sensitive me doing it and paying for it. They see now here, the budgets this and I'm like, well, that's, more than I'd load and you know, and I'll be out by the range rover. Hopefully, you know, to me it was like it's already come to fruition when you start walking towards it, it already comes. Everything I've ever head to fight for has not bean right? Please write the to list the things you hate doing in the things she loved doing when you get this book when you get this mentoring but when you download it there's so much in this book and every one of these slides is seventy seven of them is a page, and I want you to work through all seventy seven of them. And two you can take it off and start living the way you really want to live. And I need you to stop doing the hate list. I already told you, helen story. We need to look at this list. You've got two choices. You either need to overcome what you're struggling with. Well, you need to stop doing at, but you must do one of those two things, okay? Why? Why would you do anything else we talked about that this morning, your strength and your weakness. And I talk about giving and receiving all of the time I talk about fear, how many people watched the vegas video about fear and self hate guesswork? I've watched it three times because I needed to hear it. This girl has just talked about something that I needed to hear it came through me and I I needed to hear it. I watch it, I've talked about value exchange all day. I really want to just finish with this. A girl asked me to mentor here she wanted me entering through one about competition, I open skype, beautiful girl, beautiful work. I take one look at here, all of my instinct, my intuition said, tell me what you're struggling with and she said, well, three years ago, I wanted to leave my teaching job to become a photographer, and I got this devastating illness, all right? You must have felt really guilty about leaving your day job, and she was like, yeah, I did not see. Well, you made yourself so sick that you couldn't do your day job. You gave yourself every reason that you couldn't turn up to work because all you wanted with to be able to say to your husband, support me for six months while I start this business and you couldn't and she started to cry. And she said, I don't know how to do, and I don't love my husband and I don't know what I have to support me and per foot five minutes and do a skype call. We're having this real moment make calling her out, her boring right out as talking about her truth. What she's created this situation, she's put herself in, and you have to ask yourself one christian, and that is, is your emotional honesty reflected back and what your getting in? Are you being emotionally honest with what you want to the people that you love around you, telling them what you want, so you will need to getting mit? Because chances are you're not, and the truth is, is every single situation you're experiencing right now is because you're you've invited it in whether it's illness or resistance or fear or trouble or sickness or loss you've invited in, you're getting something out of it. You need to learn what that is so that you could move throat, and that means that mentoring for me comes down to how much you value yourself, how much you value your emotional self, how much you're emotionally honest with what you were in the every single person listening to this talk today is with more than they think they are.