Action: Physical Actions
Let's talk a little bit about actions. Actions matter. What am I talking about with actions? There's the things that you do, whether you get that assignment in on time, the quality of the report that you deliver. I'm thinking more about the ways that you handle and conduct yourself in person when you're with someone else, body language, posture, eye contact and nervous habits. I know everyone sits up a little straight, drops their shoulders down, When you're presenting, they say show them your palms. It makes you more available and open. More broadly, this is from the ballet, anything outwardly rotates your shoulders and hips makes more available to the world. Anything that inwardly rotate shoulders and hips starts to close you off. So as you start to bring your limbs in front of you, it closes you off further. As you collapse your posture, it reduces your presence even more to the point where you're retreating and holding other people at bay. I've seen pictures of athletic coaches on ...
the benches. Whenever they're behind their arms are crossed, whenever they're winning their arms are at their sides, start to get defensive. I really liked and Amy Cuddy video about power poses. The idea that you embrace a posture. That you take a physical attitude, or attribute, or characteristic and physically engage it. And that that starts taking induce psychological changes. Power poses, if you've never watched it, give it a look. I know there's some debate about the body of research, but still think it's a powerful concept. Posture, we're not rigid, stiff as a board. We're relaxed and at ease, but we're present. We're in our erect verticality. Meeting other humans with heads on top of shoulders, on top of hips, on top of feet. Present, alert, it's not enough to drag your carcass there, you have to bring your attention and your awareness as well. Eye contacted is an important part of the way people interact. This is a tip from our children's program. You can look at the bridge of someone's nose. It's a way to make to make and sustain eye contact without losing yourself into the abyss of their gaze. I'm doing it right now. It can fee very personal and connecting. It's one thing we teach little kids when it's time to come out from behind moms knee, and grandma can be a little scary, just look at the bridge of someone's nose. We follow each other's attention almost instantaneously based on where are gaze travels. We follow each other's attention almost instantaneously. Know where you're looking, know what you're paying attention to because other people will notice it about. Finally, nervous habits. Click, click, click, click, click, click, click. Crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. What is that a nervous habit saying about you? It says that you don't know what you're doing. We're all programed to habituate actions. They're habitual because we don't know we're doing them. We're doing them out of habit, we're not conscious. It can make them hard to combat. That person in your image team who knows you very well is you're ally in figuring this out. Ask them, is there something that I do, a give away, a tell, something that I do when I'm nervous, bored, excited? Figuring out our nervous habits can be a trick.