Vizualize What You Dream of Being
I kind of set down last night and I was like right I always have tio whenever I take two creative live I get this really distinct feeling that I have tio give you something that you can actually do in your lifetime you do now that will change your business and change your life I don't just talk about myself otherwise I don't think they keep inviting me back because you know no interesting so I kind of thought about it and I thought the one question laura and I get over no begin from people is can I watch a shoot can I come to your studio can I work with you and kenya mental me I think I'll probably get city of those emails awake anyway maybe more um the one thing I also get on social media is thank you for changing my life I don't think I changed anybody's life you change your own life you just listen to me right so I thought about that and I said how can I mean tor you today individually and you know so there's eight people in the audience a photographers here listening to us in this ...
you know the three people watching at home so that to live in a house that I can mentor eleven people so I'm going to mentor you personally this morning so I need you to answer some questions for me and I need you to write the question down. I need you to feel the response and I want you to just take a few notes about the answer. I want everybody to do this. I want you to write these questions down larry's going to do it too, because, you know, larry, it is at the beginning of her career. And so if you think about how big larry's career is about to become and she's really one foot in the door on dh, I think about her future and I think it's so incredibly exciting to be at her age and to be exploding the way she is, she deserves it and she works so hard. But every time your next tip gets bigger and bigger, your dreams get bigger. So for larry's birthday, I found this vogue cover, a book of vote covers. I don't know how many boat covers aaron there, maybe maybe hundred last hundred vogue covers and I wrote in the cover, it'll be so great when the next book comes out and whose will be in it. You know, I get so excited valid because that to me is about visualizing what you want and then making it happen. So I want to do this with you only teach you something really incredible that changes everything about how you work as a creative this is applies to business, too but you know right now we're being creative today we're going to bring business in always because business is important do you know why everybody must get paid okay, everybody must get paid everybody must lend to receive so you know that I'm big into that so I operate from a place of gratitude always whenever I'm not feeling connected to anything in this world is because I'm not using in a place of gratitude it's usually when I'm focused on people competing may competing with them I feel like others a competing with may you know how many times you've heard yourself say it but you hear other people say it they don't like me they you know they obviously don't want anything to do with mei that you competing that's not competing with you that you competing with them you know once you acknowledge that you're in a state of competitive or competition you can bring yourself back to gratitude really easily so I lived here and I thought two things one of them is I do not stand here lightly I get invited back here by this company by creative live to teach your workshops and I had this unbelievable support following on facebook off people that follow me and just post something and people just one hundred percent you know someone steals an image my followers of their writing to them people support me so greatly and I keep this overwhelming gratitude like for me it's not about applause or anything like that it's about the community that I've created online that's where I get my gratitude from so hopped into bed last night and I was thinking about how incredibly I'm grateful I am to stand here so the first thing I want to teach you is how grateful you are to be a creative a case of gratitude is the first thing you write down what am I grateful for? You don't need to tell me I just want you to write it down what am I grateful for being a creative artist okay and instead of what to hate I'm really over weddings I'm really over I didn't portrait shoot today and they did this and lady that no be grateful they paid me to eat they paid my mortgage they paid for my family I am so grateful that I get to do this for a living, shift your energy first and then watch everything else shift after you so here's some questions that I'm going to ask you it's called creative visualization now the first thing everybody says is oh I'm no good at creative visualization they really suck it in and you get really close your eyes right now and imagine your bedroom right now imagine the color of your do they close your eyes it's a creative visualisation process everybody close your eyes imagine you'd be dream right now what color is it? What's the furniture and there you can see it that's visualization right? Really simple like that's not creative visualization that to memory of the last time you looked at your bedroom and what you think is in there. Okay? The brain takes about thirty thousand photographs of about a minute or second or whatever it is it's quite incredible and that's just a memory but creative visualization is that what you dream of being now most of us and not in alignment with what we want to do? And the whole point of teaching you creative photography and work is that most of us believe that this week doesn't sell most of us believe that just yeah, that this week is a home there. Yeah, I was there I didn't believe that I deserve to have that because this was just something very creative and personal work yet so here's a couple of things laura and I are standing here today in our careers in on the stage because of that work because of what we built through that work. Okay, so the work is not always what you get paid for the workers, the marketing it's getting noticed it's the connections you make two people and it's also a doorway into a whole lot of really amazing stuff but what it is is the secret is the place with which you dwell okay, the place with which you dwell is how you feel in the moment when you do anything and you can permeate, perpetuate, transmute and pretty match create anything you want when you're in a energy of enthusiasm and excitement, and when you're creating creative work, the excitement is incredible. I feel incredibly excited today I pulled the tree root image that I found in australia, I imagine this guy with tree votes coming out of his chest and arms, I can't wait to do this. I was bouncing around singing this morning and I'm thinking to myself, it is the place with which I dwell for where I create that is when I met my most powerful and this felt like yesterday for me on the chutes and the concepts I put together, I was so excited about the concept and when I saw them come alive on set, that helped me even teach you guys better because I was excited about what was in front of me, this poncho and your hat about retouching because now you want to play with them, you can't wait to get your hands on them and you don't know and that's what we do spend out like hours at night, endless hours up excited about that we don't care about sleep, you know when you're editing a wedding or a portrait should be hate and it's laborers and it hit and you feel bound and stack and you've got a sore ass would be sitting on a shelf for twelve hours you know you've been eating crap food you haven't moved today you're probably still in your pjs you didn't have a shower because you've got up and started at eight o'clock that morning your gram pane you know your energy stark you're pissed off you know you grumpy with your family you don't want children e mails see just now and then somebody to weather email or you spend too long on facebook because you're really avoiding what you're doing there is the place with which you dwell and two that's when you're editing and you're doing those jobs you turn on music and you just rock it out and you just get it damn but you try and get it done in that place of joy will this creative work for may is where I go into my place of joy and I transmute with this great power when I'm in a state off connection because I'm I feel like I'm magic and I feel like my power is so great and I have this connection in this joy and I wantto go and share it with people and I walk into rooms and people will look at man go who are you and that is not about how I look or what I'm doing before its energy is and it is such an incredible space and so this is what I want to share this is how I do it close your eyes right now everybody close your eyes I need you to do a creative visualisation for me. I want you to imagine you have your dream career. You know, uh you're fine artist are you exhibiting? Are you creating a book? Uh, you currently about teo build a folio? Do you have one hundred thousand followers online? What is it? What do you want? Your shooting team weddings a year shooting twelve creative portrait's won a month. You're gonna exhibit that? Maybe you're doing this for a living. Maybe you're building an online career. Close your eyes. Where are you right now? Okay, that's, what you've got to write down. What are you doing? What are you doing? How are you doing it? How good are you? Is it about the audience for you? Keep your eyes shut, everybody come on, stay in there. Stay in your dream. How much money are you making? I didn't free right now you're feeling good about what you're doing. You're waking up excited. Do you have models? But like what is it? What does it look like? How many portrait shoots? Who are you? Is your brand exploding you teaching a creative life are you doing a joint class with soup rice and large eh this man's on created portraiture and how cool is that because now I'm out there doing it or I'm out there showing them how to do it because I'm better than them yea you're also what is what is that dream and what does it look like and you know what right now I guarantee the most exciting feeling and you right now it's the feeling that's inside you when you're dreaming of what you want to pay that right there is a reality for you because that's my reality all right write it down and how much money turning what are you doing? What are you shooting what do you created? Who are you? Healthfinder so you may be it's about fame for you maybe it's about applause maybe you're speaking maybe you're teaching maybe you're just doing illustrative wait maybe doing a list of work from movies, editorials, big magazines maybe you're getting your first vogue cover you know maybe you're whatever but right now that there is what you're working towards and you will never work towards that when you're sitting on the counter hime with your hands danny paste criticizing everybody else wondering why you're not getting what you want and the only way to actively pursue anything you want is to be in the space with which you dwell and that is creativity one hundred percent permeates out of you and it is like magic and on those days that you wake up and you feel totally crap, you feel disconnected, you feel angry bill's mount up and you can't pay them and you struggle and you feel stuck and bound and you don't know a way out. The only way out is to first be grateful and then be creative and being creative is not about drawing pictures or taking pretty photos. It is about thinking off a positive way through your situation right now, so I used to be young and did I had a credit card that was full, I was living wage, tow wage, four hundred dollars a week, I would be waiting for my next paycheck with bill's coming in, I would feel sick and I remember thinking to myself, I just need this money I need need need and the more you chase money, the more you chase it away and I've been there, especially when I moved to london in a very early age thinking that was the right thing, because I thought, you know, I need to be in london that's where everything is everyone's telling me that was the right place and realistically I was too young and I didn't have a business built up, I was in debt, I couldn't afford my rent, I was sad, constantly, I couldn't create for a year my work suffered so what you think you're going get a job right? You get a job because that's your default sitting because if I get a job somebody will pay me five hundred dollars a week and then you spend your forty hours going to your hateful place doing a job to get money to be free see in order for you to be free enough to create when you're stuck in a place that's so far from creation so I always say it like this there are twenty ways to walk across this met they must be I could run jump hot skip roll zigzag walk backwards moonwalk handstand walk on my you know knees I could do a million I could do twenty ways to walk across that matt so if I get a debt or when I got did I realize that all they had to do was be creative you know what does my did and so john demartini he's a good one with money did it because he always says, what is your deal? And you can say twenty grand and then you go what is your service? Well, I shoot portrait's for a thousand dollars average so you need twenty portrait's and you're out of here like his way was tune your did into service and then you're giving and when you're giving you're creating but when you're wanting or chasing, you're getting nothing so as soon as you want and chase you receive nothing and as soon as you give and create it perpetuates now just the other day I sit with nicky and mob wanna in hawaii I told both of them to double their priceless both of them went like this this is a double the price their next sale was respectively twelve hundred and fourteen hundred dollars both of them instantly doubled their average now I said you're the only one that believes that what few shift everything shifts with you your value shifts your work shifts you're giving shifts give twelve hundred dollars with the service and you get paid for it give give give, give, give give so remember the golden rule when you're creating if you are not receiving something it's because you're not giving it you know you get stingy with money or lose money you get possessive with people people get possessive with you get position with your things guilty of it I was stingy with my money and didn't put back into my biz since and as soon as they started letting go giving back it all came back to me so the state with which you dwell when you pay people pay them with gratitude I'll thank you for your service if somebody sees on look you know don't worry I'll do that for free you say no let me pay you I appreciate what you've done to me I'm gonna make money from this so let me pay you and you pay with gratitude you give with gratitude you receive but it's not the giving and receiving it is the place with which you'd well it's how you do it so it how you create and that creative visualization right now where you sit there and you wrote down that dream that dream of who you want to be you know you can have that in two months three months, four months when do you want it? You decide you decide okay? Nobody holds you back nobody you're the only one getting in the way okay, so now you're going to create today from a place of gratitude joy and guess what do you eight people sitting here? Three people at home you can write on the children do you believe you're with what's written on that paper really? Do you really think you're with what's written on that paper then I've got two questions for you is what you wrote big enough, is it no it's not is it you write what you think you could have no what you dream of having no what you want not what you want so write more double that number, triple it times it by five come on, I didn't ask you to write down what you think you with I asked you to write down what you want, what you want you know, we were just talking about that at breakfast, and, um, we were just saying, isn't it good to say I want to pay a million dollars in tax is I want to pay a million dollars in text cause that means you're in and considerably why were joking about that, but not oh, my god, imagine that case I have to pay on this. Do you think about the energy with which he think all the time? Now tell me something when you think about what you with, why do you get tears in your eyes? Why why's that why's that strong fear? I'm not with that. I don't deserve this, but you dream about it. That's a creative life that is a creative life. Yeah, on creative life. S so I kind of think about it now, and I think so for so long I was stuck in that I'm an artist, I'm a businesswoman, I'm an artist, a businesswoman. Stop bring the adis head where the businesswoman had become a businesswoman, the adis dies inside me dies and shrivels up and feels gagged and bound and then I want to create and I want to create things seem to be getting and realized that right, she says at twenty four, in the beginning. Uh but that's the truth finally that twenty four I would be a different person now well, maybe I wouldn't because I had to learn the hard way and I'm I'm someone who learned the hard way I'm certainly not somebody that lends the easy way you know I'm a slow study I get it I get it I get it all right so this is where I want you to bay now when you create that feeling inside you that magic and passion inside you passion passion not a good word everybody knows that comes from the word to torture they sal form one of the two but then enthusiasm is everything how do you get enthusiastic when you have deep mounting up how you stopped looking at the debt and start looking at a creative way out of it okay, I'm self employed if it all goes to crap tomorrow I might have to go and get a job hopefully creative life give me a job pretty good I'm pretty good at cleaning um heavy to clean bathrooms like bathrooms but the truth is is that the end of the day is when I say I will never live uninspired ever again there are so many things I can do okay if I'm creative and you said so you can't take photos anymore nobody likes your work you never going to get another shoot gun, do something else I've got no education I'm not trying to do anything else and then I think well hang on I'm not trying to do anything else I've got a lifetime of experience there are so many jobs I could do I look at waiters and waitresses in this country that work on tips that get paid nothing and get their income from tips I was like I would love for one week to go on wait tables you know why I'd just be so interested to see how many tips I could get I don't understand why most waiters and waitresses out working it work it out you don't walk in there and go you know we've got a gluten free sandwich and something out you know work it serve serve me because when I get service I pay and I love it people want to be served don't you think do you like being served I love it I think in my past life I had servants I must have because I can't be born like this a cabbie it must be something from that must be comic serve may so if you are service provider save people with your enthusiasm and your joy for creating anything and it doesn't matter what they throw at you going there and create from a place of service joy enthusiasm and you've chosen to pai mei you have chosen to give me money for the service how can I help you create for you how lucky am I gratitude to create for you don't tell me that that's not gonna come back at you tin fault everybody right now closed their eyes that wrote down their dream needs to look at that dream if you feel like you're not worthy of that dream it's because it's a good goal it's good to have tangible goals you know tangible big dreamy goals and it's really easy to work towards them working my goal is I have a goal race it reset I went towards it and even like yes I said to you like the difference between the way that I'm confident after a year and I didn't know it everyone else told me that and it's just so impressive that you don't even realize it yourself you said I had to go to be confident when I speak teo you know to not put my own boundaries in front of me and just to open up and let it go vulnerability being vulnerable you know I'm vulnerable I cry it if it's not a creative live until su cries I'm sure I'll be a cry something tomorrow it's right? I think I've got something planned even as a young photographer I find that people always used to tell me like you can't do that like you're young it's gonna happen for you when you're twenty five's gonna happen for you when he suddenly got away yeah, but maybe I thought that and I was giving that up because I had a lot of negative energy and I compared myself and it's only been the past year or so you will worry you went old enough mature enough to deliver on the stage that you're delivering on and you were standing on it you know so often you are so close to who you want to be you don't even realize it you feel like it's so far away and it is right there in front of you okay before I move on from that is that any questions from the internet that anybody wants to ask or anybody about the dream? Because it's not nebulous what I'm saying is not nebulous it's not airy fairy it's not, you know tree hugging hippie crap it works it works what wigs it's, the state with which you dwell. So this morning I was putting my makeup on and I was like it's a state with which you do out it's a state with which you'd well it's a state with which you dwell it is the state with which, you know I keep saying it over no begin it is the state with which you dwell and I was trying to say, and then I did it lots of different accents, you know I will go to hell saying this it is the state with which you dwell and that there is your call back to creativity right there, it's a state with which he'd well, how can I create and manifest, permeate, capitulate and create something be creative when I'm so uptight? How could I do that when I'm stressed? How can I do when I'm angry? How can I do it when I hate my job and my patent? I hate my life hate my body, I hate my spells that diet on. Then I'd say I'm a creative I'm gonna get on facebook and then beg everybody else who's successful cause that's awesome and that's going to get me so far because I'm such an awesome person because the truth is is I am awesome, I'm just in a shitty play so that that's the call saying you are awesome and I know you want people to tell you awesome, but being an ass or I'm gonna get that I know we feel like that because that my most worst moments I used to think if you knew how talented I wass, then you would help may become surprised because if you knew that, then you would bring me up. And I blame this on my agents I've had in the past, the people that have supported me, I'm like, but why aren't I getting what? Why, they don't help me get to that point kind of guy who I have seen it by mps, we feel like that, yeah, being they're done bad feel like that because we wanted the truth and happened because we wanted somebody else to do it for us, because for god's sakes, we had so much telling, can't you see that? And so many people operate from this energy, and I did it, I did it, I did it for more years, and she did, and I tell you what, I used to look at other people who were less talented than me that were more successful, and I would say, how did they know that meet here all the time and dead off doing it myself. It is a state with which so everyone in the room is very, very much engaged and reacting to what you're saying strongly are going to photography, no question that fear of failure is a tremendous obstacle for many of us also fear of success, commune, obstacle because we feel we do not deserve it, we have to believe our dreams and goals challenging to do but necessary, which goes to a question that let's see tiddly wink asked, how do you get past the point of undervaluing yourself and your work when you first start out? I have the vision I have the eye, people love my work, but it seems like they love it even more when I offer the free shoes as opposed to paying for it. So how did you get to the point where you had enough belief in the value of your own work that you were able to get past and, you know, make that effort your own self, stop competing and be grateful stop consulting, comparing stop competing is dot contrast it yes, you don't need to just give service because what you're doing is you're looking for validation and that payment you're looking instead of saying, okay, here it is, I called three thousand dollars to do a photo shoot. Are you too expensive for may that's gold? Do you buy every dress you try on? Okay, so do you take home every guy that tells you you're beautiful and those were the old days that digging so you know you don't you don't take if you don't get every job you pitiful, right? So you don't cry about it, you don't buy a dress, you try on you leave the shop, the girls not crying she's hanging a backup from the next person still good so I look at it like this I'm three thousand dollars for a finish it you're too expensive for me that's going three thousand dollars for a photo shoot well I'd love to be photographed by yuko weekend I book you in but the truth is is what you're doing is you're giving it away for free hoping people will give you money and when something's offered for free like I'm free but I'm I should be three thousand but you know I'm going to give it to you for free and it's like, well, I'll take it for free you honestly if you don't put a price on yourself nobody's going to pay it because you're trying to give it away for free hoping that somebody will mysteriously pay you for no reason like do you go into a shop, try and address it's it's eighteen dollars and say, listen, I like it so much I'm going to give you two fifty because you're awesome and this dress is amazing on may so let me pay you three times more no you know when you value yourself you say how much you are you'd say it you deliver it and you put a price on it and every year you put that up or you change the service or you edm or or whatever it takes to re energise there that's when you get your belly one yeah keep coming keep down all right so that's my little mentor you these your questions okay that's what you dream of being what was that dream korea anybody in here brave enough to tell us what these remarks please go? My dream is to be it editorial travel photographer and do that part time working in developing countries and then speak on travel particularly in the middle east and to get people out there doing it on have all of that make enough money that I can take my friends and family travelling and that's big and scary because for me because I don't know how to take the next step and I have to believe that people will pay for what I'm giving you exactly us have been saying okay don't get caught up on the who's gonna pay for it because that's not the question the question is what steve um I gonna take to do it and if it means spending your first one during a kickstarter rating money doing a raffle selling your body you know pole dancing you do what you do you do what you have to do to get what you need today done and if that means you create your first one and make it look like you made money from it it doesn't matter I don't care if you borrowed the money from your wealthy appearance where your husband pays for it doesn't matter how you create it okay, it will arrive when you get caught up in that, but who's gonna pay for it so I remember the golden rule this is a story I tell all the time I was doing a martial arts competition and I won four gold medals and I had them underneath my jacket and I went to work on the monday and I showed my boss's wife and was like that, uh, I won four gold medals and she was like, she stood there and she just looked like this and she got tears in their eyes and she said to me, I will never know what it's like to achieve something like that, and I looked at her and I said, what do you mean? And she was like, you just achieve what you want something and then you work it and then you'll achieve it and I'm like, well, I love it I go every night and she said to me, I'll never know what it's like to do that I see well, I look at it like this if you want to run a marathon, you know, even I guess I'm gonna run a marathon and then clearly I'm not built to run a marathon my body doesn't like running, I don't enjoy running because I don't do it if you enjoy running, you do it every day and so to make myself run a marathon, I would have to focus and dedicate a lot of my value and move a lot of my schedule in order to make time for it don't want to do it not going to do it and already I've talked myself out of it or you go for a round go for a run you pull a hamstring take three days off you go, you don't do it again and then before you know it, you're not running a marathon and evil in sight or I love this one I'm gonna run a marathon really have you run a marathon before it's pretty had you know anyone will tell you why you can't run a marathon so you don't run a marathon and then it's not your fault it's larry's because do you know what clarity to me, laura? Steven, you're not built for running and it's larry's fault not my fault it's larry has, you know, it's like you know what larry said to me? She said I couldn't have a marathon and so I don't, but the truth is is this is what I told her or you have to do is buy pierre shoes, go for a walk if you like it, go for a walk, walk, walk a block from the block, walk a block on the block if you like there, do it again tomorrow and do it again the next day too you can run five k and then when you can run five k door fun round for charity then do a team k and if you like that do forty two case you know why? Because you like running so much it's changing your body you fit you getting out of here early in the morning and you simply loving what you do but you were trying to run a marathon when all you had to do was buy appear shoes all right to stop trying to run the marathon stop trying to tell me who's going to pay for it how are you going to get there? Because you're never going to do it somebody's going to tell you it's not gonna happen you're going to believe that and then you're not going to do it and it's gonna be laura's fault you and the truth is that all you had to dodo was booked the first one and pay for it and then find a way to get it funded. This lots of waste money can show up, so stop trying to run the marathon by the shoes and go for it three years later I'd leave that job I was living in australia, I get random phone call don't know the number pick it up it's that woman that boss's wife she said so I'm somewhere and I just wanted to tell you I just wanted to tell you where I am and I say what's up she's like I'm in new york by myself and I'm about to run the new york marathon and she was like I did it I bought the shoes and I don't know she liked running I didn't even know I was just it was just a story I just pulled it out of here she's in new york run new york marathon and she says to me hey I bought the shoes I went for a run tuned up my neighbor is an olympic marathon man a gold medalist she sees me running she goes join my jogging group so she joined her jogging grape she runs marathons forty two running marathons based marathon runners woman over forty focus so that story blew me away so much I'm standing there she's running a marathon and I'm not living my drains and it was my story see how I needed to hear that so incredible just by the shoes and that's all you have to do it by the shoes go for a walk so today you wanna buy the shoes are going to go for a walk you're going to make a date for your first trip you're going to find a way to fund it because if you really want it it will happen for you one step at a time. Okay. That's creative visualisation you feel that you've been to church this morning. How can I use this to enhance my business in my folio? You kidding? May didn't we just do that? If re part ofthe that is enhancing your business in your studio and your folio so I want to ask you some really big christians in terms of who you are and what it is inside you that you want to do, why don't I want to take a picture of a guy today? Okay, today I'm taking a pretty girl I'm putting a pretty dress on here and I'm sticking here in an ivy warned some cellar taping her or scott what do you call it here? We call it solitary way dough but what do you call it? Scotch tape tape? You know, not never takes scotch tape, I'm gonna scotch tape it to the war and I'm going to have ivy all over her then I've got a guy coming in and I've got these bound tree roots, so this is what's inside of me. I wanted to create something that is thie artist in may I don't want to try and make something just like lara loved her themes he's today she's a fashion photographer issue joe's models that were her these air may okay my models today I gagged inbound trapped okay they are stuck they have got things holding their hands their faces are going to be stuck type lock down like this is a huge part of my work tree roots growing into the ground being grounded being stuck being just actor one spot you know in bondage incarcerated stuck can't speak can express myself just physically stuck and I have felt like that most of my life I want to express through my ads what is inside me that is just crying to get out and why they bound and gagged and so stack because I am and I need to say it and express it and I need to photograph it so I can communicate to you how I feel what's inside you what is it? Is it beauty? Is it dancing? Is it freedom? Is it running through fields that's the biggest thing people say I don't know what to shoot a ll the time you where do I get my inspiration from in it comes from inside every time I've looked for inspiration that's why I started with self portrayed I was a shy girl I remember doing this one for herself portrait which was basically me and I was bullied at school I remember coming home and I created this picture which was like my face as a mask on my thing and that was like a mask that was hiding me and underneath this this person and that's the personally feel now that's who have blown out and I look back to that picture of my mom even say's to me she's like that was you that that's the person achieve and when she said that she's like I can't believe you just shot that at fourteen and when you do that yeah different back there and not because you're younger yeah look physically different you're different yeah, I can see it in my eyes see? And when people say I can't create you just take it from here can you see laura and her work now she shoots models when you see her in her work you've seen her in real life you made to you khun see her right? Can you see me in mine? You can see me in my work, right? So why did people look at my wig and say she looks like you the school looks like you somebody said that to me today about the reed here it doesn't look like me what she's looking like is my face what she's doing is holding my expression because I'm holding her space I'm holding her, photographing her space and who energy right there is in my energy and my energy it is straight holding his lock down just like there and there's a camera between us but before the camera comes out my my energy holds that, just like larry's holds our models energy, whose energy is holding that space that's, who we are, you are doing that the best photographers know how to do that. We're talking about this the other day with felix, which had ever done he's holding that space, you can see the beauty in his imagery, it's, not just about the space or the fashion he's holding that beauty. She does it with her own work. Now, with your creative work what's inside you. What is it? Is it beauty is pain? Is it drama? Is it just that the way you want to create in see beauty? Is it laughter? Is it children, and what do you want? Elements.