Lessons

Lesson Info

Your Block: Seeing is What You're Being

we're gonna keep going through this one approaching a stranger to an inquiry, a consultation, a shoot, viewing the pick up the post, contact the business pitch. We're going to do woods specific woods that make a difference. We're going to do things that change and make a difference. Every time one of you have an epiphany, keep throwing your hand up because it helps me realize what you don't know what is working for you. What is helpful to you? I learned all of this by doing it on my feet. But it's quite amazing when you start to teach you that you don't realize how much you learned. And no, no one to start teaching people what you learned to know. And then people are like, Oh, I need to do that. I need to do that. So this is where I started to. If I go back to what I learned, it was this. We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are okay. And nice. Nen Big quote, wrote it on my wall, kept it on my wall from many, many years. Every time I would see something, I would read t...

his quote. We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are. If you see there is no money in your community, there is no money in your community because that's what you're seeing. There is always money. Okay, there was a smudge. Wealth is there is poverty in this world. Sometimes we focus on the leg instead of on the abundance. It's very easy to do, but it is not that truth, Okay? It is not the final truth, okay? It shifts and changes and it's out there and there's always enough to go around. And this is very, very important. When you start realizing what you're blocks are around pitching and marketing yourself. I could not sell my wig and I could not sell myself for the 1st 12 years of business, not business. The 1st 12 years of my career, once I owned by own business, I had no option but to start selling myself and my business. Okay, so, up until the moment where I was paying the bills, I was unemployed photographer. I didn't need to sell myself, and I didn't need to sell my work because somebody else did it for me, all right? I simply could not do it myself. I did not value photography. I did not value what I was creating. I did not value it, and I wouldn't have paid for it. So today I want to ask you when you pitch your prices, do you value how much you charge? And I'm going to confront you about that as well, because you will only sell as much as you're prepared to spend. Do you know that? Do you know that you will only sell what you're prepared to spend. So you need to address the value around that pitch. So we're gonna go through that as well. There's so many pictures and running a business. And then So this single action changed my career, and it was that getting this card printed out of the 2000 cards, I have probably five lift that I kept as a memento. I never redid them because by the time my business had progressed into sort of 4000 and 7 2008 I was still using them. But the IPhone was becoming Farmall prevalent and easy to manage and carry. Although I still know the power off this card. This card. You know, the most significant thing about this card is how confident I felt when I was holding it. I remember that being like my Superman T shirt, it was I remember thinking I'm a really photographer. I'm not a fraud. Nobody's gonna say 2 May your fraud. Your own wannabe here has bean. You're You know, I'm on the real deal when I got these, so I felt trust me, you know, print your work, carrot with you, if that's what you need. This was my suit of aama it in seven images. I told a story off seven different women twins, sisters, a woman in his six days, a redhead, a blonde, a beautiful girl from Africa that had the most incredible life story Bellow with hit Ted does. And it funkiness told so much this young girl here who was only 14 you know, it was aged appropriate. It was It was appropriate for everybody. It had something to touch on, something to talk about. I know their names. I know where they live. I know their stories, you know, it was significant that connected me to my work. and I felt so proud and showing people. Now, if you ask me to pitch without this, I'm a very different person. Could suddenly the only thing they've got to look at us, me, okay? And I don't feel comfortable being the one everyone's looking at. But when they would get this, they weren't looking at May. They were hearing me talk while they were going like this. And I used to laugh because this is nearly 10 years old and what people would say to me was, Oh, wow, you're really good and I would feel validated, right? Consider, to be armed with a folio in some way, shape or form at all times to change your pitch. She who wanted to who says, When I show my before and afters either on my phone or folders. Some people just react as if it's all thanks to photo shop, and any photographer could do it. This is where I get stuck. How can I respond to that kind of comment? Um, okay, so is it photo shopped like, What are the comments? The point is, is that if somebody said to May OAS, it'll Photoshopped say, Yeah, that's a little bit of magic in there, but I wouldn't be offended by that if somebody said to May, It's what you're getting offended about. So when people write in Bid was so somebody rang me today to ask for a shoot, and I told them the prices and then they had this shooting. Now they're trying to talk me down to 1/5 of the price, and I'm really upset and offended why you upset and offended most people trying to get a good deal like this. No need to be upset and offended. It's what is up sitting in offending you that you need to consider. So if somebody says, are that's or photo shop and you're offended by that, not everybody you show is going to say that. But somebody said it to you and offended you because somehow that made your value lists. It's like when somebody says Okay, just so we clear. I don't like any negative posts on Facebook. I'm like, Keep your laundry in the laundry room. Think it your duty. Laundry goes in the laundry room, Not I'm not on Facebook. One of the things I didn't like was when people posted that you must have a good camera. Nobody's even said that to me. You must have a good camera. And if they say you must have a good camera, I said, Yes, I do. And I know how to use it like I'm not offended by that comment. So why would I make something of it? So just address what you're fended by. It's very easy to be offended by something because you offended because it's some help personally is attacking you. That's what you need to address. Do I not value my work? And I think people think I overshot my work, you know? Is that your problem? Like, what is it that that your problem is? What are you saying? Because his here's the thing we did. I write it, I write it. It's coming up. You always lead into my question to you people knowing full well what I'm going to say. What are you seeing? Because that's what you're being right. So when somebody, um, very few things about my work hurt my feelings because I'm I see it all the time. Negative comments on Facebook, negative comments about me being an instructor. Recently, somebody attacked me physically my weight. Um, you know, they wrote something really horrible on Twitter, like I used to want to be so Bryce. And now I she's fat and she single when she has nothing to envy. And it hurt my feelings like I cried. I you know, I posted about it. The reason it hurt my feelings is cause not because of what they see it, but because there was truth in what they said for me. Right? So these truth around my weight and around being single at that time, that made me cry. Now they've seen something that has struck a new. Whereas if you called me stupid or dumb photographer or not a good speaker, I would have laughed. Does none of those things would hurt me, but they just like, okay. And I would have made a joke cabin. But they said something that has resonated with a pain that I carry and that attacks myself failure. So when something hurts you, you're seeing that. So when you have no value for money in income and you see poverty everywhere around you in competition, that's what you're focused on. Do you understand? You cannot see past it because that's all you're seeing. Now you have to consider that that's not the truth right now. That is not the truth. That is just what you're looking at. Does anybody have any questions about that? Cause I could. I need Teoh. Explain that Something fierce. That is like, if you can shift that if I could challenge you to shift the one thing you believe right now, I could change it. Does anybody have a block that they just can't see past that they need to. Do they want to share with May like if you brave enough to try that out, then I have a block that that I've been struggling with. And and, you know, I think that a lot has to do with and how you pitch is your story, you know about you and who you are and why you do certain things. And for me, you know, after a lot of thought and and I guess some sold searching, if you will. I've determined that what hurts the most Well, my story the most is it comes from a place of lost, right? I had a very tragic loss in my family. Have had multiple of them, and it's something out of a movie. I mean, if I tell it now, it everyone would be balled up crying. And that made me Mawr of aware of making connections because I lost someone very dear to me without just after making a real connection with that person, my brother, and passed away three months after I made a real life connection, a real life. I was the little brother in the Big Brother. After I made that connection, I lost. And I want to tell people that you are beautiful and you should exist in photography. You should exist for yourself and for your family, because you never know. But that's such a sad place for me that it's difficult for me to translate that to hair beautiful. And I want a photograph you without getting into sort of the gloomy side of it and without knows, pretty much pulling into tears about really that situation. You know, you can really walk around in parties doing that. So so my wise, difficult to tell people it is difficult for me just to explain, and it's difficult to translate that why I want a photograph you and why I want to make you happy. It's important for me to make people happy and make real life connections with people. Relationships are key to me. Okay. Can I address something now? Yes. I've lost £100. If I was to walk upto one special woman who had £100 on and said, Listen, I used to be £ bigger. I know what it feels like to not like myself. Do you think she would be stoked about coming for a photo shoot with me? No, Um, if I even bought out that story. Oh, how would that all I'm talking to hear about this who wait? Because I know what it's like to have £100 on. If you come up to me and said I used to be overweight, I'd be like, Why are you talking about my weight? I wasn't was talking about my weight, but we instantly related to us, right? Because it's our thing. So I realized that I don't need to tell that story. My pitch is so authentic that what I believe permeates. So now the skunk is permeating something really beautiful. And it's called sincerity. Now I don't need to pitch anything, no matter what. Wait. I am whether I'm coup via skinnier than I am now. If I woke up to a woman and say to hear I want to photograph you and when she says Why I say because you're beautiful and I want you to see it that I don't need to explain why now when she comes into my studio, if her body image comes up, I can relate. I can have a personal conversation and I can say I I lost a family member. I lost a family member four years ago. I don't have a single photo of him. The power in that statement is enough, but you don't need to say it in your pitch, your sincerity and authenticity to make somebody beautiful toe want to share that is permeating out of you the way you pitch to someone. I didn't tell you what the woods where I told you how you feel if you woke up to somebody feeling that they will feel it too. Trust May Energy is remarkable in It's so attractive and we're so drawn to it. Why did that go Come and sit by May. Why did that woman call me the next day? Because they wanted to know something in the way I told them that they wanted to know more about me. They were interested because I did something that nobody does. I walked upto a complete stranger and I paid her a compliment. That was genuine, sincere and full of authenticity. When you are having that conversation and I'll tell you this, I have got so many stories. Richard. They go like this. I was about 30 photographing this family and I was thinking What I do doesn't see if the will they make people look pretty. I put make up on the myself photographs back to them. I have a shallow job and really doesn't mean a lot. That's how I felt. Didn't value myself, didn't value my income, didn't value my work. I photographed this family. Six weeks later, the dead dies. He waas an amazing man. He was a pastor and his family were just incredible. He had four kids that each had a partner in each and they all had kids and I didn't know whose kids belong to which couple because he was 16 of them because they all treated all of the kids like their own kids. Like they were a family unit that you just wanted to be part off. Like I was like if I could choose my family, I would live with this family, this family love each other. I never knew who was a sister in law and who was a brother. They all looked similar. They were all beautiful. Incredible. He was the matriarch when he died. I printed this photo for each of them. Border 30 40 of this photo with this dead in the center. It broke my heart like they just had so much love for each other. And they were talking about how the little kids talk to him at the table. I saw the value off photography that day, and I will never forget it. I was like, here I was thinking what I did with Shell. Oh, and I reconnected to that. Now I would never bring up that story and they said clients it to me. You know, I lost my mom a year ago and going through the photographs. I just wish she had bean here. I would then tell that story because then I can connect. I can talk to them about their mom. I can even offer retouching services for any images they might have that I could salvage for them. You know? Think about how many emotional conversations are around there. Why? But you do not need that in your pitch. You only need to hold it in your heart wall. You pitch and all you need to say to anybody even if it comes up was you know, I'm a photographer and I lost my brother. And I made a promise after he died that I would approach more people on the street that I really wanted to photograph. And you're one of them Because I made a promise to myself that I would be confident enough to do that. Take my card. Have a look at my work. If you're interested. Place called me. Let me think about it. There are a 1,000,000 ways to say what's in your heart if you're brave enough to say it. But you don't need to actually say it. If the energy in your body is, I've got a pitch to them. But I don't want to sound sleazy I don't wanna be sleazy. I don't want to be creepy. You're gonna be sleazy and creepy. If the energy and your body is, they'll probably find out how much and then they won't want them. Then, yes, they probably will tell you. No way. I'm not spending that money. If the energy is in any way, whatever you think it's gonna be is really what it's gonna be. This is gonna be your making, okay, Would even the energy you walk up to somebody? This is what it's gonna be. But if you can start with paying compliments to complete strangers, then you're going to be OK. And if you can connect with them now somewhere coming up on my slides with bouncing around cause people are just going asking me questions that a relative, that air coming and I put everything in sequence. But the truth is, there is no sequence to this. It's all about the self, anyway, is there are a 1,000,000 different groups, organizations together, business groups, you know, these grieving groups, this these millions of reasons and ways for you to go and sheer your true self. And there was always an opportunity to stand up and tell that story from a place off marketing myself. You know, something really weird. Um, when I met Nikki, I met Nikki because she stills best friend Jill is who I took to Paris. Nikki me took to Paris. I meet Nikki and Jill in Paris in, like, a months time on the two year anniversary of Jill in Paris. We were all rascals are going to New York to mate Jill to photograph Jill Teoh, Give people an update on how deals health is and tills. Last two years has been remarkable, and Nikki and I worked together a lot, and I've been so lucky to gain both of their friendship. And over a 1,000,000 people have watched deals video and I have received tens of thousands of e mails just of people who have it's helped them change them, you know, done something to affect their life. Connected to Jill, connected to Jill's family connected to his story. It's being remarkable. One guy, one out of one million, and I'm sure these other negative stuff, but I don't see it, So it's good one guy tweeted way to go supervise feathering her career by using cancer patients. I was not upset by that tweet because I know the truth. Okay, so you don't get upset by staff unless it is hurting you. I know what I did for Jill. I know what I did for myself. I know what I did for Nicky. I know what I did for every person that was part of that project, and I feel really good about it. Did it further my career, Yes. But not because the marketing fitted in my career and I was using Jill or exploiting Jill. But because I belaid 100% in my heart on what I did that day, the decision I made to take him to Paris to give till that gift to still be connected to them. I 100% believed it. And I pin mediated that I feel like that was, you know, a good thing. And none of that hit me. No. Nothing you could say about Joe would hit me because I believe it. So you know what I mean. Hold it in your heart. Let it permeate your energy off. Why? You're brave enough. Why you're confident enough. Hold your brother in your heart. when you go up to a complete stranger and say, You know, When my grandmother died, I had to read her eulogy and I was so terrified of public speaking, but wanted to do public speaking. So I said, Lorna Mae, you're on the other side. Give may strength to stand up there and speak to these people. Cure May of my inabilities big publicly. I use the power of the people who love you and the energy of loving them to stand up and do what you need to do and watch that change. You wanna take a question? Yes. Okay, place. And I'm asking this question because there's been a dozen people that have asked. Yes. Okay, So people are still struggling with it being about you more than others, I think. Yes. Where do you find this is from K Kirch? Where do you find clients who value enough to pay you what you're worth? I've tried pardoning with two gyms, one high end, a couple salons, a couple boutiques. I'm unable to generate interest from this market much. Let's get people to pay thousands of dollars for my work. I've been following you for over a year employing your techniques, but cannot generate interest from my community to get leads as you were good enough the status Because I get a lot of people tell me like I'm doing everything you're doing. It's not working. And I looked at their website and they work is crap. Like, have you considered that your wicks? Not good enough yet? I mean, seriously, this is not a joke. This is not a get rich quick scheme. This is a luna genre of photography. Build a business. Secondly, when you tell me you cannot generate business, there's something about what you're doing that is putting a bigwig in there. And today we're hoping to find out what that IHS Because you are the one that is repelling that work. You either don't believe you're with it. Don't believe the value of what you're selling or somehow you're permeating through that pitch that you're not with it. Okay? You are doing that. Yeah. Yeah. I have seen some of the best photographers in our industry Can't make money. You know that, right? Can't make a dime. Not, uh, dime. Some of the most average photographers in an industry make it perfectly healthy living, some of them a big income. Don't you look at those people and think there's something in what they're doing, that they're doing wrong? It's not luck. It's not. I've been doing everything that you tell me, and it's just not working. Why is it not working? What would you say to somebody that said that to you? You're you're in your first full year. What would you say to somebody that that's not working because you're making it work without my help? I mean, Nikki document Wrong, Mickey Em up. Wanna do everything I say? Like if I if something goes wrong and they they ask May I tell them? But you know, they don't talk to me outside of creative life. I mean, I only see my point when she comes to creative life when we were on Facebook, but you know, she doesn't get access to me. 24 7 I was ring so and ask her how to deal with this problem. She goes to the Facebook group, But when I built a reveal wall the next week, they did reveals I never coached them through that they just saw my Facebook post and they were like, I'm gonna do that. They apply everything I've said. What would you say to somebody that is just not generating any business that's here not working, working out? You're doing something wrong. What do you think it would pay from hearing? I can relate to the, You know, my block is money, So I would just say you're not valuing yourself. I mean something. You're not telling your work or your work's not good enough for notice. The language also was little line pay thousands of dollars. They're not valuing them. The, you know, trying to build an average of thousands of dollars. You're trying to build an average of 1200 to start out. With 28 days, Folio Shoot says you were working up from an average of 400 to 600 to 900 to 1200 to 1600 to 1802 to to 262 to 8 23 To those of the increments that photographers seem to go up. Watch that segment. You are just trying to create a product with around $900 because it's going to actually get you a profit margin. A small one, but our profit margin enough for you to build up to the next level, right? There's no profit margin. 700. Not with a makeup artist in the studio. But you know, there's a tiny profit. Imagine at 900 a better one. A 1200. Your sweet spot is 16 to 1800 season. So I've heard a lot of photographers say you need to price yourself where you couldn't afford yourself. You said you have to believe you have to actually be able to spend that money on what you're selling. So which one? Which one? You think it iss? I think it's I don't think you could price yourself above What? You OK? What? Spain Teoh Believe it. Yeah, because you don't believe that. I believe you're only gonna be able to sell us much as you would spend. Okay, I believe that I know what I would spend and I don't spend higher Otherwise, you know, if somebody said to me the other day, they sent me an inquiry for a photo shoot. And I think that you know, the $ package and they're like, Can I see the price list was like that is the priceless. I'm one package on $3000 plus text, and then they're like, Oh, I can't afford you. And I said, okay, they can't afford me right now, but they might be able to in the future. You know, I don't get upset about that, but somebody, one of my friends here tempt lucky You're not $18, now and I looked at them and I was like, Oh, thank you. That's really nice thing to say, but I would never price myself $18, unlike where you could. And I said this who I would never get it because I don't believe I'm with $10,000. I'm quite happy at $3000. I'm quite happy with my package. I'm quite happy with what I offer and I get paid for it. But it took me a long time to be comfortable with that. I would pay $3000 for my experience, but I wouldn't pay 18,000. And then I thought about it, and I thought, Any liebovitz is 20,000. Who's sitting fee and last like would I paid $20,000 to be photographed by any Labovitz I was like, Wow. I mean, you're talking about a deposit on a house. I said, What? I really save up $20,000 t be photographed by any little bits, and I kind of thought about it, and I was like, Maybe I could do there may be. And then I thought about all my friends, their own homes, and I don't own a home yet because I haven't settled anywhere. And I thought about taking my health money, and I'd be like, Instead of buying a home, I chose to be photographed by any Liebovitz. I would have to really value that, wouldn't you? Yeah, so everybody has a tuning point. But remember, I've told the story many times about my friend, who every year chooses a photographer. She takes $ out of his savings account. The case she brings up the photographer. Eight years she's done this, she says. I'm a photographer and they usually know who she is because she's quite high up. I've got a son I'd like you to photograph May, and she pays them $1800 she says, All I want is a beautiful 16 20 black. My image for $1800. She makes it very clear that she's a photographer. She goes through the whole sales proceeds to shoot everything, to see how other people do it. She enjoys the process. She buys a beautiful portrait. There's 8 16 20 Portrait's in their house off here in the san in every year of his life for eight years, and she looks the same and just about all of them. And I was like, What an incredible thing to do. You honor our industry, you honor and value the cost of what we are. You have it on your wall. If anybody comes to a studio, they walk through your home. They see your portrait ts. I value that because I pay for it. Wouldn't the smartest thing you do as a photographer would be to come to me for a photo shoot, get a beautiful portrait on your wall and then show all of your clients that you did it because you value it. And yet I know so many people that don't believe in the value of what they're doing and giving. They don't believe it, so if you don't believe it and you wouldn't pay for it. I can't see that anybody else would. So in the in the stream of being stinky, if you're being stinky with your value and you you think what? I wouldn't pay for this and I don't think that it's with it. You can make money, but you won't hold the money. That money will just go straight through. That helped works. I believe anybody can make an income, but you can't keep it in this. You value yourself. That's why I want to do the MPs and workshop. So I can really ask people the value questions. So I can really say I mean, I would love to spend a day with that person because I know it's hooting. You hearing this and I know you can't see past it, and I know that you don't see any other option than failing. And I know I'm telling you, it's your fault. And I know that you have no inside around that, and I am. I am so sorry that it's not easy to understand. And I'm so sorry that you're going to get hit with it over and over again until your name one of this and I am so sorry that there is no elevator to success. I just put them on my Facebook page. It's a steer, and it goes up and up a stairwell and you get burning thighs and it hits and you want to give up and you don't want to climb any further. But you got to keep going because, you know, if you read the Addis Way, it's like you're going up a mountain and you're going up a mountain. Different altitude, same view. You will learn the same lessons over and over again, just from a higher view. Higher view Highview. Same view every single time, just a higher altitude. It doesn't go away. There's a question at the end of this talk that's relevant to the person that asked me that. Christian, the question that the end of this talk simply says, What is it? You cannot learn what your block is until you see it over and over again. You cannot take responsibility for your block when you are emotionally involved in it. All right, when you are emotionally involved in what's going on, you can't see the wood from the trees, you're in it, you're not above it. Only when you step above it Can you see down and go. Oh, I'm doing that. Do you get it? So when I'm telling you it's your fault, it's kind of like it's not fear, is it because you're crying out for help And I'm telling you, it's your fault, and you're gonna get smacked in the face over and over, open again until you confront what it is. So Nikki and I were talking about that. I said to Nikki, You have a block around money and she was like, Oh, I do. And she said, Never realized it. So we started to talk about value identity other night. Like I say, What do you pay for? What would you pay for what you comfortable paying for? How much money you comfortable spending like, you know, recently, Nikki spent some money on a dress for a wedding. It was more money than she would ever spend on a dress, and to me it was nothing like what she said she spent. Cause I value shopping so, you know, if you follow me on post, But you know I do it quite regularly. I have a black belt in shopping and eso to hear it was a big deal. She spending money on this dress, but she ward and she loved it, and she'll weird over and over again. But these value around it and I'm listening to her words and her woods are telling me that that's a lot of money to spend on myself, and it was difficult to do. And I said, You're talking about $300. If you expect people to give you an average of $1800 you need to know I said, I want you to save $1800 going by something you really want. It has to be something you ridiculously want. I don't care if it's Gucci shoes or a Prada handbag or I see buy something for the value off what you sell, buy it, feel uncomfortable with it. But say, I don't care. I want this more than anything in the world. I challenge you to do that, and I said to her, Would you pay me $1800 to photograph here? She said, Yes, we didn't the last two times, so I was like, So pay me, pay me and I'll take you somewhere and I'll photograph you how you dream of being photographed so you can feel it. And then you can show those images to your clients and say, I did it. I loved it, you know, Domain this? Yeah, there's a connect in that. I think it's really, really important.