What's Your Worst Case Scenario?
What is it that holds you back from pursuing something you love what air the vampire voice is telling you that sucking the good stuff out of you um we want to make sure that you know if you have the workbook that this is filled out if anything else popped into your head that you maybe didn't write about before but resonated with you as I went through these fears keep adding to this chart for sure any more career fears that have come up for the people in that shack jacare interesting what people are saying, you know, assess earlier sherry was saying that procrastination is I think all of the things that you've been covering about people you know, that fear of financial people have reached a certain point in their career well, I mean their life and they got the home and they've got everything they wanted in material goods they have that fear of losing that by going up pursuing their dreams that may not provide the income they needed beginning that seems to be the biggest theme is coming ...
along I don't know I think we can all appreciate absolute and I think and I hope that there is some reassurance and comfort in the fact that it's not just you and I think that's what's so exciting about this work and getting the word out and and learning about being a renaissance old that's it saying right, like that's what my clients get more excited about than anything that they're like. There's a we'll hurt for someone like me. That must mean that there are other people out there like me, and I'm not a lost cause. A loser flake, a weirdo and, you know, it's like, oh, I'm part of a group of people. So I think we need to embrace that and hopefully know that we're not alone. Anything new pop up for you guys. Oh, yes. Jenna. Um, one thing I just realized that, uh, once you identify, uh, timeline and your values, it is easy to work around that because you have new priorities in your life. So I could see not living in san francisco city, but some are accessible to it sometime in the future. If I know that a year or two from then I'll be able to go on amazing trips. I know it. I think once you identify those passions, you can re balance your life to make them work. Love it. Yes. Show major. Big. Yes. And it reminds me of the career fairy tale we read yesterday where cheryl moves from seattle to livingston, montana. Because she said I I want to try out these things it's going to be less expensive for me to live there and it's going to still put me in nature and be a place that I'm gonna really enjoy living in but it's not the big city and this is the compromise that I'm making for now I love that jennifer cole and I were talking at breakfast and it was kind of funny because like you go back and forth between I'm afraid nobody will I want my services teo I'm afraid everybody'll want my signature on it and it's like so funny to have both sides of it and then you know there's a fear failure and there's a fear of success but I think it's a really good transition right? So if you start if you start fearing that piece of like oh my god, what happens when I get too big that at least shows you what it is you want and I know for me my my big fear now and what I want us to move on to talk about is what's your worst case scenario so like even though this isn't such a life coach she hippy dippy thing to talk about this we always want to talk about unicorns and rainbows and moon beans and sunshine it's a worth like putting yourself in that place of what is the worst thing that could happen if I followed this dream I want you guys to write it on the workbook page fifty five has space for it and what do you really see when you're in the lowest of the doldrums? So this is something you could expand on later if you want but like I want to hear the stories about being a bag lady about nobody loving you about not being able to go to happy hour with the girls maybe that's the worst case scenario for me right now my worst case scenario is going back to corporate america I believe I can do it but it would be my worst case scenario um but and the next question after this is how could you avoid your worst case scenario so like after you take that space too this is the worst thing that could happen then you could start saying, oh, this is what I could do right off the bat in order to avoid that so I know in order to avoid my worst case scenario and having to go back to corporate america I could create new offerings I could do it if my client's dried up. If the money dried up I could do a stale I could do you know all these different things to avoid going back to corporate america maybe instead I'm gonna want a part time waitressing job I could do that instead of going back to corporate america so we want to talk about your worst case scenario we'll what's your worst case scenario we just want to get it out there and how could you avoid it? And you know what? Let yur ego take over um nobody is going to be accused of having a big head here I know and I could say very happily that might family would not let me if I really go worst case scenario and I'm like a bag lady on the street and no one loves me and I'm living in a cardboard box it's not gonna happen because of too many people that love me on you know, yes, I'd have to move back to long island and live with my mother and that you know and I'd be uh I love you mom, but it would not be a proud moment for me at all but you know, I will not be a bad lady on the street I know that I trust that so I love to hear what's coming through and the shot I see you guys all writing, writing, writing away jenny, what are you writing? And I feel like we haven't heard from you today uh a couple things one is that, you know, if if we became super broke that my husband would be disappointed or my family would be disappointed that I wasn't able to do it, huh? Or that because, you know, I used my name as part of my business name that maybe I would ruin my name that if I go to do something else that maybe that would tarnish relationships and I would be able to move forward from there. S so how could you avoid that changed my name go into witness protection having david here this isthe yeah and I think you know, maybe just I know it's hard, but I think some of what you guys were talking about this morning about, you know, bringing your partner along with you and kind of setting up things you know, finding ways tto feel financially secure without and feeling secure in my business that no matter what happens it's not going to ruin me, you know, right? Right? Absolutely and I have to stay I barely know you, but I feel like I know you well enough to know ok? It's one thing to have your business ideas tank and maybe people aren't buying what you're selling it's another thing to have your name tarnished and ruined and you don't seem like the type of person that's going to burn bridges or, like, be a jerk or disappear on your clients or take their money and not deliver on things, so to me it's like that's that's not that's, not who I've been talking tio here like that's so so we could have trust and just our own compass and values and how we treat other people that like okay, yes the business might not go well maybe no one's gonna buy and micro shape patterns but I could pick myself back up I couldn't convert you know my followers may be into something else my clients into something else because they're going to like what I say and who I am and having worked with me or bought something from a so like ego ego you know, feed it in what's happening in the chat great comment especially coming from marcia marcia wasn't with us yesterday and she's saying I'm being very quiet right now because I swear michelle has been monitoring my thoughts on fears and recording them I did miss yesterday so I don't know we did actually address marshall just so you know the managing significant relationships family the spouse who don't get it that's holding her back right now uh we talked about you know what I realized yesterday too I feel like I said to myself, you know, I think I've heard it all like nothing's coming up that's a surprise to me and I hope that is comforting to you guys also that looks this's what everyone goes through this is what we all have in our heads you're not a lost cause you're not because because this is this is all of us right now yes, justin so for me, I think it's the challenge of work's already so demanding it takes so much time and it's very stressful, so using that extra time I know like even the fifteen minutes it's inspiring, I probably do spend like an hour on facebook I'll admit alright, but that the concept of trying to do more at once and not being able to balance both well and having it affect the steady income when others are relying on your income a swell like I'm first generation here in my family coming from another country, their education didn't mean much their background didn't mean much, so they're making significantly less than they would in their normal lives back home. So now my income is supplementary teo kind of a few people around me so there's the fear of financially letting other people down, not being able to support them if something comes up as well as negatively impacting my existing job. Okay, I love this. Thank you for that example and I think we're going to really address that when I bring up my guests in just a few minutes. Paula here that studio who is my excuse buster she's the excuse buster she came to me when she had a three hour commute to a job she didn't like and a toddler at home and I was like this lady is not going to do any work she's gonna waste her money all up and down this place and she came to every session with her homework done and then some she found ways to make it work so I think not to plug my my book on amazon called ineffective escape for nine, ninety nine you could buy it and it's gonna it's gonna help you zero in on what's going to make you feel comfortable and confident in making that transition and showing you the baby steps you need to take but you know, I think it's about just starting small starting those fifteen minutes a day just starting those just starting that off starting a new way of thinking talking to your family about this transition, giving yourself a timeline it all really makes a difference and were so so running over in the segment so we're kind of in a speed through this stuff but in the workbook you'll notice that you know there's a chart here my vampire voice does and I love you know here to be able tio to put everything that you wrote down and here is the rebuttal so like let's pretend that we are all lawyers and we're in the court with our vampire on our vampire is trying to make the case of whatever it is they're saying and we might not believe that yet ce right because I have a feeling a lot of lawyers don't necessarily believe what they're arguing we might actually believe it yet but we have an argument against it so my vampire voice used to say nobody can even make a living as a career coach for creatives for pete's sake and probably you idiot jerk dummy and I would re but it by saying I'd argue back this will resonate with the right people and they'll see it as an investment to not spend the next thirty ish years hating five days of each week so I love to hear really quickly from lego one or two of you what could you say to the vampire voices and order to joanne gave a really good example right? Like you're half death you're fat you're sixty two who's going to hire you mean mean mean vampire and you're re budding at by saying I have my hearing and so that's not an issue I could always lose weight whenever I want and the only way to not be sixty two is to turn sixty three or there's an alternative which we don't want to think about I love that I love that example so even if you don't believe that yes that's what he would say in court so could someone give me an example yes then okay so my big one is I'm not enough I need to be told what to dio well I don't have enough talent drive commitment, creativity resource is oh I don't have enough enough is one of those words I hate I don't know why basic no one has a definition of what enough means nobody whenever I hear enough I go oh what would be enough what is enough for you and I go I don't know so it's always this a nebulous thing that we can never tackled yeah I love that it's not enough so what would you say to that voice that says it's not enough okay so and the voice really says like I'm not uh huh uh huh that's like when it's really bad huh uh and what would you say what would you just argue so I say okay when I'm truly being myself and I'm aligned with who I am I know that things flow resource is and doors open that I can't even imagine I love it do you believe it yet that's been my experience okay that's when my real life okay so that's fantastic so even if you don't believe it but you know that that's your track record bring that up right bring I've done this before I've conquered this before I have been sick I have been poor I have been fired and and I've I've soldiered on and I know I could do it this time too all right so we have this really cool exercise that I want everyone to do it at home because I want you to personify you're a vampire I want you to give it a name I want you to give it a look I wanted can't you two give it acts reboots and I don't care if you can't draw because here is my vampire this is my vampire vern this is my drawing ability and talent usually I draw stick figures so this is actually really good. So my vampire is four feet two inches tall he's a hunchback he has lots of wrinkles he is an abundance of ear hair. He is a long island accent. He too looks like this is what michelle, you never gonna amount to anything? He wears a flowered picture. He has a stupid cape it's stupid he wears old man shoes, high waisted pants that are orange, which clashes with this pink shirt. I could pull it off, but he can't. And he is woody allen glasses he's like and whenever I hear my vampire voices in vern's voice uh they're funny, they're ridiculous. They're almost kind of cute, right? Because vernon like such I've made him such a I don't know typical new york guy that I'm almost like over and like you must be concerned about me thank you for bringing that up, but but this is actually why you don't need to be concerned about me anymore, so during the break you guys draw your vampires either disarmed them like I did. This is a disarming vampire, and every time I hear those voices in my regular voice on another voice, I try to put them in vern's voice and I could deal with them a lot easier or you could actually do the maybe scary vampire that you see and I promised just giving it a voice and characteristics is how it's going tio help you deal with it better it's not going to be this a nebulous thing that you don't see really vampire voices aren't all bad they show you your fears and that's helpful because you know what you need to overcome to get to your goals so the louder the vampire voice or sometimes the quietest vampire voices are the most powerful and scary uh is telling you exactly what you need to work on to get where you need to go and that's a really big help, so make sure you draw your vampire during the break you show it to us, you snap a picture, you tag it with hashtag dream career live on facebook on twitter on instagram. Upload it to the course page it says like client work or something and that would be so great if you want to expand on this keep adding to the vampire voices and rebuttals worksheet as you hear them say new things and as I said before they're never going to go away they're just going to stay new things read the work of art by steven press fields the best book ever okay and I have to tell you to take you less than then two hours to read it and he talks all he helps it's it's so motivating it's so encouraging and the procrastination pieces interesting he talks about resistance with a capital r and really everything that's preventing us from doing our creative work whether personally or professor or professionally is an act of resistance whether it's procrastination whether it's perfectionism any thing that is stopping you from doing your work is resistance and the on ly way to combat it he says and I agree with this whole heartedly is to do the work so showing up and doing the work is the only way to keep resistance at bay even if you throw all the work out even if you spend a year writing a novel and then toss it in the garbage you have still built to resist at us still beaten resistance you still have moved forward and your and your project and has beat resistance and the other thing I love that he said ah that I get really excited when I hear from my clients that their vampire voices are getting louder because he says you get closer to the thing that you want to be doing resistance fling out because resistance feels threatened resistance is going to die if you actually do the thing that you I want to be doing you're supposed to be doing so if you hear it got louder and you have more things thrown at you by your vampires, you could be like, oh my gosh, that means I'm getting closer to the thing that I want to do. Resistance is really scared by vampires really scared and that means I'm doing an awesome job, so keep I'm going and you could make a vampire slaying kit, right? So we talked about the wind book yesterday, the tangible place where we keep our thank you's and our compliments and our accomplishments that could be part of the vampire slaying. Cut your worksheet with the voices and the rebuttals part of your vampire slaying cat. I have a board on pinterest called motivations station where I pin everything that motivates me songs, comics that I found online articles, videos when I hear the vampires, I go to the vampire slaying kit I go to the motivation station on pinteresque go to my wind book on I'm able tio get myself back up and moving