Are You Listening
And now just a little bit about listening. And my questions really is are you listening? And what are you listening to? Because as I've said, if you're quiet, you may be busy listening to stuff in your head, and that's not gonna help you very much. So, you could be listening to what's happening out in the world, what's happening in the people that you're talking to, and then, can you distinguish between what you imagine is happening, which is based on what's in your head, or what's actually happening in the world. And that's something, I think, that takes getting used to because it's all in your head, but did I imagine it? Or is it actually happening? And that's, again, when a question can come in handy when you interact with a person and say, I keep thinking this, is this what's really happening? And they can say, oh no, are you kidding? That has nothing to do with you, or no. They can dismiss it or they can say yes, as a matter of fact, this is something we should talk about. So agai...
n, kind of don't give in to the laziness of, oh, I think I know what's going on, when it's especially something that you're imagining. So a few listening strategies that I want to share. And these are kind of obvious, but really hard to do. And I'm not talking here about gestures of listening that make it seem like you're listening, like looking someone in the eye because I could be very easily looking you in the eye and totally not listening to you, right? Or nodding my head and not listening. So do those things if they're genuine, if they're real, but really what you have to do is be open, which is easier said than done, and you have to be focused, right, so don't allow yourself to be distracted by things that are happening or, again, things in your head. You have to be active and listen to every single word that someone says. Don't rush to get the understanding and don't rehearse what you think you're gonna say next. Don't interrupt. This is actually not easy at all because we have things that come up and we want to say them, but you have to wait until the other person is finished. Don't talk to yourself and rehearse your response. And what you can do in your listening is listen for the questions you can ask. Alright, so be listening for things you don't understand and then ask questions accordingly.