Money Management for Couples

 

Money Management for Couples

 

Lesson Info

Conditioning Habits

If you don't change here's, what happens with pain? It doesn't end you will, you will, you will ignore it. You will hide, you pretend it doesn't exist, but it's there, if you take a pain head on pain your mind, then it will last. It won't last a lifetime. It'll last a short amount of time and then you let's get some new pain, but pain doesn't end, but that pain that you're experiencing can definitely end. Get leverage, use it, use it for strength so that it moves you forward to have what you want instead of making you know you, you stop moving, right? Okay, can you do that? Excited? Yeah, on audiences with you here, very brave of you and thank you for coming up on dh and being vulnerable and being an example of what that transformation can be like, so dead, nava says. I think this is fascinating, not her pain, but the psychological effect that our perceptions of money have over us. We don't often recognize them or acknowledge them, but saying them out loud is powerful and leverage. Awe...

some thank you good comments any other comments like you're welcome to like how does it feel for you? You know what what is like what is your feeling about experiencing the pain or give me you know, a circumstance or like wow, you know, I went through this pain and that's when I turned my life around because I've got leverage and I I associate it to in that that's when I said no more so if you have anything to add go ahead and you can bring it bring it up as they come into the chat rooms you know you get a chance to actually choose your screen name you could be anonymous with your comments maybe there's something that you have been wanting tio put out there in the world and just speak about that this is actually the place to do it is to hop into that chat room and do it and also just bring your feedback and uh and play along with us here well some thank you so go ahead and write in your notebook on a piece of paper wherever you want write down how you're going to get leverage like I'm gonna what what pain points or you're going to so skate to make sure you write this down because it's very very easy to be like a robin said associate to the pain got it got it I'm gonna do that next thursday next thursday never comes I really want to associate with the pain today not been right so you got to make sure that it happens so write down what those things are and at least write down you know when you're going to make sure I'm not saying you have to sit down associate of the pain I just want you to be real with yourself and I do want you to like look at those those pain points and use it as as leverage and use it as a motivating factor to get you to where you want to be okay so I'm gonna give you number two number two is habits and rituals ok check this check it check it change so on this money master map your personal money mastery road map you're going toe learned like throughout these next three days you're gonna learn this habits and rituals that you can adopt that have been proven like I'm not making him up I mean I've seen thousands of thousands of clients and read you know, tons of books about this about rich and wealthy and all this and it's the habits and rituals that determine where they are financially right away second said beliefs and behaviors cia it all counts right so habits and ritual so I'm going to show you an example this is my dog you saw in the first video of her one of the videos uh this is my dog moxie and what I want you to notice is some of her habits and rituals at the beginning and then noticed how those we conditioned new habits and rituals and that we continue to do it so it's stuck so here we go enjoy this it's my honey no just slippery I said then she just peed that's what I said earlier I think you think you don't have to hear it how cute is that little thing this was the first day we got her she we picked her up we met her like a someone delivered her to this like kind of midpoint and it's kind of like a truck stop and uh trucker came out and he handed us this like anybody to little dog and it was like my god like she smelled so back it was terrible and the first thing we did and like the gas station we went and washed her and then we went home and she's still stuck and we washed her again that's just funny part but what I said to him at the beginning I said did she just pete because on the way home when we first got her she was sitting in my lap I was like this is my first dog by the way is my first first I won't think my first pet this is my second pet so I was going to say riel pit but I had a pit that was it was a pet is a pet rat okay had a pet rat and the funny thing is is that it looked like a mouse at first so I actually knew they told me they have these little rats at school they're all babies and I thought they were so cute and my parents didn't want to have a pet and I wanted to have a pet and so I thought, well hey, I can probably like my mom would probably agree to a mouse so I was conniving there and I told my mom that there's like I want to take this a little mouse home can I keep? Is that okay? Just like fine as long as you clean the cage as long as you could of course I'll clean the case no problem so I take this mouse home and then a few weeks go by getting bigger let's go guys getting bigger and then my mom is like I don't think you got him now it's I think it's a rat and I was like, oh really? I had no idea I think it was just very recently that I told her that that she was like a really did you new and you you lied and I was like, I really wanted to have a pet odd thing is I named the rat tiger I don't know where that came from settle and it was a white like a grayish white rat named tiger anyway so this is the first like dog I ever had that was my one pit and by the way I never cleaned its cage so my my poor mom was like as long as you please get down no problem I was like I don't know in sixth grade or whatever it was gross I don't want to do my poor mom was always cleaning the cage and so so angry at me for that because I had promised but you know what happens anyway when I got when we got this dog I was excited had a little dog what has also kind of had my concerns because you know I don't know if you like to have a dog and I know how to train it but my husband is just like amazing amazing at training dogs and like eh? So what first of course like the first thing you need to train them to do is is to go to the bathroom outside right? So we have like a schedule up like buyer back door and I would look at it okay what time I should feed her and then like basically a theater and then you let her out a feeder any letter out featuring letter out eventually they learn that they are conditioned if you do it consistently right they change meaning they don't pee on you are in the house right so we did that. And then my husband is so so, like great training dogs that he I mean, I did a little bit, but he mostly did it. He began to train her and here's a cool video. You'll see how these habits and rituals began to form. Where? Moxie at twelve weeks old is learning how to do some tricks checked this up. Okay, this is moxie, twelve week old harundale terrier. Mozzie. Sit. Please use it. Pretty that's. Very good. Can you dance? This is your tree. You can come right up here to get them to come up here. Moxie, terrier. Gay for knoxy. Ok, cool. So you can see that was twelve weeks and we had trained her to do some tricks. And she was being outside, which was awesome. And I wanted to show you introduce you to moxie. Now, this is just two days ago or three days whenever I left new jersey on my husband's going to show you some of the same tricks because this is how you train them right over and over again. Consistently condition them and my husband also want to say hi. So here she is now not much bigger by the way people are like I was she said the puppy she's almost two s o this is to be almost two years later and that's her side she's fifteen pounds and she stays that size and we just full of it okay, here she is here they are hi. I'm praying I want to say hello everybody created life actually introduce youto moxie marty hi everybody you're out there everybody is learning so much creative life like you like you does that make you excited about our dance with your girl she's being rewarded here okay? And when they're learning all this amazing thing about relationships and use it for me is it ever possible that they may need some patient you should patients and when they sit for me when they finish his program when you give them a lot well that's a very let's see what if they took this information and then just didn't do anything with what would happen with their what if you like they just die like a relationship? Well it's a slow at work old stated earlier there are situations where you might be where they might lead many to overcome tremendous obstacles o he's here your handle occean sever awesome I love at the very end on these like this and she's like yeah just like high five cool so habits and rituals s o we talked about getting leverage so again make sure you write down how are you going to get leverage? How can you create leverage by the way, what did we do with moxie? How did we create leverage? Because we created leverage right treat treats so that was pleasure, right? So he said here's a treat you know, if you do this trick, you get pleasure so you can also create leverage by by giving pleasure you know it could be like well, if you do, if you d'oh if you let's say reveal the truth and you're not hiding, you're failure you know and you give you like you do that once and then you get some pleasure from it like you get a client because like I'm like, wow, I can totally relate to you or something now you're also reinforcing that reinforcing that change, okay? Or you khun you khun make that happen, teo and then habits and rituals and this is all going to be on your money mastery map so makes you right down like I'm going to give you a bunch. But if you've thought of like what our new habits and rituals that I might want like in your financial uh when I called the financial future prediction test in this financial future prediction tested you remember this that I I have ten questions here that you wrote you know you rated from one to ten and this kind of gives you some hints of some habits that you could have you know, I had clarity of our income expenses and saving some maybe a habit like a new habit would be to have clarity our income expenses and savings right money masked by the way I think making and growing money is easy that's a belief I often feel happy excited sure, I regularly track my cash flow in my network that's a habit that's a ritual that's something you can adopt toe have ah ah better score on your financial future prediction test okay there's a comment that's coming in on that sparked interest from what you said about tracking sarah baldwin says she's a stay at home mom that works full time on building her photography business while juggling the kid's tours and clients. I spend more money than I make yet my husband works all the time, so I'm the one buying the groceries, baby clothes, diapers but every day it's the same thing. How much did you spend it's exhausting and a source of conflict since I'm not working or making enough money? And so is that a habit habit that they have when talking about about what was spent daily? Yeah, I mean that's definitely have it now it's okay, to have that habit of talking about what you spend daily. So here's here's, what came up for me when you said that what I find interesting, this is now a second time has come up, like with rina and what was the name? Sarah baldwin? Sarah, is that it looks like you're you're really looking at it's my money and his money. Now I'm not here to tell you that you need to put your money together. That's a choice, you can make it, it doesn't matter, but you're gonna learn this tomorrow and the next day is that what's absolutely necessary is that you have transparency of the finances. You need to know how much your husband makes. You need to know how much he's spending your spending because you're a unit, you're married, or you're in a partnership. If you want this to last, you need to think of your life as this as together as your life, it's one life you're living with your partner, and if you think of your lives is separate, you're going tohave these things come up like he's makes that he makes the money, I mean, you could you could totally that you say, well, I'd take care of the kids, I do all the dresses I doing stuff like that's, why work, right? So you probably feel like it's not really fair, that you're getting judged by that, and the problem is, is that you're not aligned with your goals, and this is what we're going to go over tomorrow, like it's, so important to get in line with your goals, because now if if you both want, for example, farina, you want to make money and he wants you to make money, you're aligned, but you haven't really discussed that and come to a point where you're like, we both want the same thing. Isn't this awesome? Now, if you you know, for sarah, if you're thinking, well, what do we want? We want groceries, you know? We want food, we want clothing we want our kids taken care of, honey, do you want my you want me to take care of the kids and make sure they get the school and they leave school and they do their homework all those things, right? I'm sure he's going to say yes, of course I want that, and you're not saying it so that he's valuing you more, you're reminding each other of what's important to you as a unit, right as a couple, and then you can figure out what you want together and how, how what is the fastest path to getting there so if you say, well, hey, we want financial freedom or we want our kids to be taken care of, to be raised in a great home where where we have a loving home and their homework gets done and they're good students, whatever you're a line like you want, you talk about a figure? Well, we're in line with that. So what is one of the things we need to do to get there? One of the things is we need money, right? Awesome. One of the things we need, someone at home, if that's what you believe to take care of the kids, all these things we need, we need to happen, we need these things was everything that we need to be in line to make it happen, right? And then if you're in line like that, it's not like you make the money and I take care of the kids and you do this, I do that it's like, what can we, what can we do to create our future together? Like, stop thinking that if you're married or if you're in a relationship and you want this relationship to last, you gotta thought, stop thinking of I and start thinking of week and say is actually sharing a success story on turning into the wee from the eye she says are he's my husband and I used to keep our money separate due to child support issues, but now that we no longer have the support do, we've combined our money and things they're so much easier to see see where the money goes and what we can save awesome and I can totally relate to that. So when my husband got married, I mean, we had a daughter, I had an immediate I inherited a daughter immediate child, you know? And we had child support knows I'm saying we like at first I mean, especially because my money issues like I didn't like the fact that, you know, we were paying and it was we because I was making money and a lot of, you know, goes to child support or whatever, and but it was like it was it came and went like that I had those thoughts because once we were married, it was like, we're in this together and I mean, maybe you're not married, maybe just in a partnership, but I would really recommend that you again think of yourself yourselves as a unit like you reiterated to go from ida we right? And that, like now we pay child support so that's how it isthe I don't care if I bring in the money or he brings in the money or where the money comes from we have these goals. The goal is to raise our daughter and make sure that her mom has taken care of, so that, you know, our daughter has a great life. And if you frame it like that, by the way, it makes it a lot better than what I used to think. Like, oh, crap. We have to pay child support you want. I want the best for my daughter.

Class Description

Strong financial management skills are a must-have for a thriving, healthy relationship — but conversations about money can trigger feelings of guilt and anxiety. Simple financial discussions don't have to turn into emotional minefields. Join Robyn Crane and CreativeLive to learn the skills you need to manage your money as a couple, without letting your finances get in the way of your relationship.

This course will teach you everything you and your partner need to know to manage your finances effectively – without stress, guilt, or conflict. You’ll learn concrete tools for communicating about finances openly and honestly. You’ll also build strategies for recognizing and correcting flawed beliefs about financial management. You’ll explore why money issues are among the most common reasons for break-ups and divorce, and learn how to safeguard your relationship against the friction financial disagreements can cause. You’ll also create a concrete, easy-to-implement system that allows you to achieve financial health by playing to your and your partner’s strengths.

You’ll leave this course with strong personal finance skills and an understanding of how to collaborate with your partner to work toward a thriving financial future.